


Thunder in Our Hearts

by Wolftales



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Assassins AU, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-16
Updated: 2017-11-12
Packaged: 2018-07-15 11:19:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 62,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7220248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolftales/pseuds/Wolftales
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rey and Kylo Ren are two assassins that can't seem to stop running into each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Stranger

**Author's Note:**

> My first Reylo fic. Inspired by a number of different movies and shows. I got the title from the song Running Up That Hill. Let me know what you think!

Rey had her eye on the target. George Pence, the CEO of the third largest weapon-manufacturing corporation in the world. She was perched on a rooftop, watching him through the scope of her rifle. He was giving a speech in the building across the street from her, at the gala celebrating the company’s twenty-sixth year. She could see him through the windows. Clearly whoever it was that wanted him dead wanted a big show. Shooting a CEO while he was making a speech in front of all of his colleagues would certainly make the front page the next day. The jobs she got were often high profile. Her clients usually wanted a dramatic ending. She was happy to give it to them. After all, the money was good.

The client had been specific. Take him out when he was finished with his speech and the audience was applauding. Pretty gruesome, but she’s follow the instructions nonetheless. She could tell that his speech was starting to wind down and settled herself closer to her rifle, her finger inching closer to the trigger. One shot, that was all it would take. She never missed. Her scope was trained right on his head. He was finishing up his speech. In less than a minute, he would be dead.

Pence raised his hands into the air and she saw his mouth stop moving. He held his hands up and the people around him began to applaud. He was finished. Rey took a deep breath, like she always did just before a kill, and her finger began to push back on the trigger.

A shot rang out. Pence dropped to the floor. Rey looked away from her scope, incredulous. She hadn’t shot him. The shot had come from somewhere else. She knew it came from somewhere close, since she had heard it. She snatched up her binoculars and looked to the rooftops on her left, where she had heard the shot coming from. At first, she didn’t see anything, but then she saw movement on the roof two buildings over from her. She looked closer and saw that it was a man walking towards the door, a case in his hand that undoubtedly carried a rifle inside. She couldn’t make out whom he was, but she knew it had to be him that shot Pence.

Rey hurriedly packed away her rifle. Pence was dead, and the police would be arriving soon. She packed her rifle as she always did after a job, and headed away from the edge to the door. When she was inside, she took the elevator down, all the while wondering who it was that had taken out Pence. Nothing like that had ever happened before. She’d never even come across someone she didn’t know in this line of work. She wondered if he worked for another organization, or if he was freelance, taking out people on his own.

By the time she was outside of the building and putting her rifle into the trunk of her car, she had already resolved herself to finding him. He couldn’t have gotten far. He had only left the rooftop moments before she had. She grabbed the pistol she kept in the glove compartment of her car and tucked it into the back of her pants, then started heading east, in the same direction the building he’d been on was in. She kept to the alleys. In this line of work, people tended not to park on busy streets. She imagined he was the same.

She wasn’t quite sure what she thought she’d be accomplishing if she’d found him. A part of her was angry that he had taken out Pence. Pence was _her_ target and this man, whoever he was, had taken him from her. She was already wondering what she was supposed to tell headquarters. ‘Yeah, the target was taken care of, but not by me.’ His interference was already shaping up to be a pain in the ass for her to deal with. Though she still wasn’t exactly sure what to do if she found him.

The alleys surrounding the building he had been on were empty save for a few dumpsters and rats. Rey wondered if he had already left. It wouldn’t be surprising. On every mission, she’d always take out her target and head off as soon as possible. At least until this mission. She continued to search the alleys around the building. She was beginning to think she’d missed him until she heard the sound of footsteps coming from around the corner and she stilled. There was no way to be certain that it was him, but despite that, she quieted the sound of her steps and made her way to the direction she had heard the footsteps coming from. When she reached the corner, she peeked around it; hoping whomever it was wouldn’t be close enough to see her.

There was a man there. He was leaning against a motorcycle and taking a drag from his cigarette. The man was tall and dressed in all black. His hair was black too, making his pale skin look almost sheet white. He looked like the man she had seen through her binoculars, but she wasn’t sure it was him until she saw the case strapped to the motorcycle. The same case she had seen the man on the rooftop carrying. She knew then that this was the man who had stolen her target from her.

“You can come out,” the man said suddenly.

Rey jumped at the sound of his voice, surprised at his acknowledgement. She had been so quiet, and he hadn’t even glanced in her direction.

“I know you’re there,” the man spoke again. He took another drag of his cigarette. “Either come out or leave. Staring is creepy.”

Rey considered this. She could just leave, but she wanted to know whom this man was. Going back to headquarters with no answers at all wasn’t a good idea. Her mind made up, she stepped out from behind the corner and stood to face him, keeping a safe distance between them just in case he tried anything. She placed her hands on her hips to keep them close to her pistol.

The man turned his eyes on her, taking her in. He looked her up and down before his eyes finally came to rest on her face.

“What do you want?” he asked, bringing his cigarette to his lips again.

Rey raised her eyebrows. She wondered if he even knew that just in the last hour she had been on a rooftop a few buildings over from him, intent on killing the same man he had killed.

“You killed Pence,” she said.

“Yeah. I did your dirty work for you and you’ll still get paid.” He blew out some smoke from his mouth. “You’re welcome.”

Rey’s mouth dropped open. Well, clearly he did know she was just on a rooftop set on killing Pence. His words annoyed her. She wasn’t grateful. He stole her target from her. The job may have been done, but not by her, and she didn’t need anyone doing her work for her.

“You should scope out surrounding rooftops when on a mission,” he said, bringing her out of her thoughts. “Never assume you’re alone.”

“I _know_ that,” she snapped. She had checked out all the rooftops surrounding her twice before she had taken her position at her rifle. “You weren’t there when I scoped them out. I would have seen you.” It was a lame excuse, but it was all she could think to say.

“I was a little late, but I guess that worked out in my favor tonight,” he said, dropping his cigarette to the ground and crushing it under his foot. He stepped away from his motorcycle, moving closer to her. “Why are you here?”

“Huh?” The question confused her. He already knew she was on that rooftop for a mission.

“Why did you follow me?” the man restated, recognizing her confusion.

Rey swallowed. “I…” she started. She wasn’t sure how to answer his question. It’s not like she had a very clear reason for following him other than sheer curiosity, but there was another explanation she could give him. “You took out my mark.”

The man raised his eyebrows. “And you’re…angry?”

Rey bit her lip and tried to keep eye contact with him. “I didn’t complete my mission.”

“Your mark is dead, is he not?” the man took another step closer to her.

Rey resisted the urge to step back, not wanting him to think she was intimidated. Her hands inched closer to her pistol. She was starting to realize just how tall he was. She wasn’t exactly petite, but he still towered over her. She didn’t like being outmatched in this way. “Yes, but _I_ didn’t complete my mission. He was mine to kill, and you took that from me.”

The man stared at her for a moment. “So what, you’re angry with me?”

Rey said nothing.

The man scoffed. “The way I see it, you should be more angry with yourself than with me, angel. Pence was my mark too. I did my job. You didn’t.”

Rey clenched her jaw, not having anything to say to that because she knew he was right. This man had killed her mark, but only because she hadn’t been quick enough. She stared at the man for another moment before turning on her heel and starting to walk away, their conversation seemingly over.

“I know who you are.” His voice came again from behind her.

Rey stopped in her tracks. She waited a moment before turning around again. His words baffled her. “What?”

“I’ve heard about you,” he continued. “You work for the J.C. under Skywalker. There’s been word going around in the last six months that he has himself a new favorite, a girl who never fails him. You happen to match the description I’ve heard.”

Rey stared at him. She was unaware that she had developed any kind of reputation among other people in this line of work. This man knew she worked for the Jedi Council, but she knew better than to confirm that.

“I know who you are,” she shot back, ignoring the suggestions he made about her.

He raised an eyebrow. “Do you?”

“Yes,” she answered. To be true, she wasn’t completely sure who he was, but she had a sneaking suspicion. Everything about him matched the description of someone she had heard about for a long time. “You’re Kylo Ren, aren’t you?”

The man gave her nothing in response. She wasn’t surprised. People who had this job never gave anything up about themselves to anyone they didn’t know they could trust.

“You certainly look a lot like I’ve seen him described,” she continued. “And you fit the bill of being an excellent marksman, and one who no one ever sees coming.” She certainly hadn’t seen him coming. “You work for the K.O.R.” The Knights of Ren, one of the J.C.’s competitors.

The man in front of her who she was pretty certain was Kylo Ren reached into his pocket and pulled out another cigarette, still not giving her any confirmation or denial of her accusation.

“So is that what I should call you?” Rey asked. “Kylo Ren?”

“Call me what you like, angel.” The man lit the end of his cigarette with his lighter. “But it would only be fair if I had a name for you too.”

“You’re actually asking me my name?” Rey asked. Giving him her name would be idiotic, and he was well aware of that.

The man shrugged. “It was worth a shot. Sometimes people slip up.”

“I don’t.”

“You did tonight.” The man smirked at her, and Rey had the sudden urge to slap him.

Rey glared at him. “Well, it won’t happen again.” She turned on her heel and began walking away, intent on not turning back this time.

The man’s voice rang out again from behind her. “See you around.”

Rey turned the corner and headed into the darkness.


	2. Blue Blazer

Rey poured the scotch straight from the bottle into the tankard of hot water. When she poured the appropriate amount, she reached for the bottle of syrup. She was in desperate need of a blue blazer. She had just taken out her three targets, all of whom were on the floor of the bar. They had put up a fight, and made quite a mess of the place, but she had won out in the end. The bar was off the side of the highway near Austin in Texas. She found the three men; one of them was the bartender, having some meeting in the bar. The meeting had come to a halt when she showed up.

The three men had made enemies with wrong people in the drug trade, enemies that contacted the J.C. and offered them a hefty sum of money to take them out. Rey was more than willing to oblige when Luke gave her the mission.

After squeezing out the lemon peel into a glass, Rey scanned the bar counter for a lighter. She didn’t see one out in the open and turned around to look through the shelves. There wasn’t one there.

_What kind of bar doesn’t have a lighter?_

She bent over to search through the cupboards but only found more bottles of alcohol. She let out a frustrated huff.

Someone whistled behind her.

Rey whirled around, her hand automatically seeking the pistol she had tucked into the back of her pants. When she saw the source of the whistle, she froze.

There was a man there, and for a moment, Rey didn’t recognize him, but then she remembered. Kylo Ren, or at least, the man she was pretty certain was Kylo Ren was sitting at the bar. He looked relaxed, as if he had been sitting there all night. In his hand was a lighter, and he was holding it out towards her. Rey’s mind was racing. How the hell could he have come in and sit down without her hearing him? She had only been turned around for a few moments. And what the hell was he even _doing_ here?

“Need a light?” he asked casually.

Rey studied him. It had been over a month since she first encountered him. She’d reported what had happened to headquarters. They hadn’t been happy with her. Luke talked her ear off for almost an hour about never letting someone get the jump on her like that again. It was a pain in the ass for her to deal with, like she knew it would be. For a few days after that, she’d been angry. She almost wanted to find him again just to tell him off. But that passed after a few days, and things had gone back to normal. She continued going on missions and there had been no unexpected guests. Within a few weeks, she’d started to forget about Kylo Ren.

Now he was sitting in front of her holding out his lighter, a smirk tugging at his lips the longer she stared at him. Rey stepped forward and snatched the lighter out of his hand, if only to get him to stop looking at her like that.

Rey lit up the lighter inside the tankard, setting the scotch inside aflame. She quickly stuffed the lighter in her back pocket before picking up the other tankard and pouring the liquid from the first tankard to the other. The liquid was alight with a blue flame as she poured. Once she finished pouring it into the second tankard, she moved to pour it back into the first, the flame still alight on the liquid. She felt Kylo Ren’s eyes on her the entire time.

“If you want one, you’d better squeeze out a lemon peel into a glass,” Rey spoke up.

He hesitated for a moment before reaching over the bar and grabbing a glass and lemon peel. Rey continued to mix the drink as he squeezed the peel into the glass and dropped it in when he was finished.

Both glasses ready, Rey poured the drink into the first glass, the flame still lit up around the liquid. She put the second tankard on top of her glass when it was full, so the flame would go out. When she finished the first glass, she moved to Kylo Ren’s glass, placing the tankard on top of his glass when she was finished.

The flames on both drinks were quickly dying out.

“That’s pretty impressive,” Kylo Ren said. “Where’d you learn how to do that?”

Rey lifted the tankards off both of the drinks when the flames had died out. She pushed Kylo Ren’s drink towards him and picked hers up off the counter.

“Years of practice,” she said and took a sip from the glass. She swore her blue blazers tasted better every time. This one was no different.

She watched as he took a sip from his own drink. When he moved the glass away from his mouth he raised his eyebrows and gave a small nod.

“Not bad.”

Rey scoffed. She shouldn’t have expected much more from him.

“Do you usually drink after missions?” he asked her.

He asked her that so casually, but she was struck by how personal the question was.

She shrugged, trying not to show him her nerves. “It takes the edge off.”

“There’s an edge?” he asked.

Again with the personal questions. He seemed to want to dig around in her head. It was unsettling.

“I had three targets in a bar,” she said, and looked around at the room pointedly. “I wanted a drink when I was done. Are you done picking my brain?”

He took another sip from his drink. “You just didn’t strike me as the drinking type when we first met.”

“I could drink you under the table,” she snapped.

“I bet you could,” he agreed, a smile creeping up on his lips.

“I would assume you don’t even drink much if you can’t tell that is an _excellent_ blue blazer,” she said.

Ren squinted at her. “Are you still mad?”

Rey bit her lip and looked at the glass in her hand. Seeing him again did remind her of her one and only failed mission. “I’m…not,” she said quietly.

“You kind of seem like you are,” Ren pointed out.

Rey shrugged. “Well, you being here is a reminder that I failed a mission. But I’m more angry with myself than with you.”

“Well, like I said that night, I was only doing my job.”

“I know.” Rey brought her glass back to her lips. His very presence was becoming an elephant in the room. She was hoping he’d give her some explanation, but clearly she was going to have to ask him.

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

“I like this bar,” he said.

Rey raised an eyebrow and gave him a ‘really?’ look. “Ren, did you follow me here?”

“How could I have followed you?” he asked. “I’d have no idea where to even follow you from.”

“Then what are you doing here?” she asked him again, irritation apparent in her voice.

“I told you,” he said. “I like this bar.”

Rey huffed. “Fine. If you want me to believe that you happen to like this bar in the middle of nowhere in Texas, and you happened to walk in on the same night I was taking out two of its patrons plus the bartender, then fine, I’ll say I believe you.”

“Stranger things have happened, angel,” he said as he took another sip of his drink. He kept his eyes on her as he drank, and Rey could see his amusement. He wasn’t even trying to hide it. He had followed her here, somehow, and she didn’t like that he was able to find her without her knowing about it.

Ren put his drink back on the counter and looked her up and down again, the same way he did when they first met. Rey felt herself blush. He could at least be subtle about it. But he didn’t look like he cared if she noticed his looking. Maybe he even wanted her to notice.

Rey looked at him again. She hadn’t given much thought to his looks, but he was striking. Not handsome, exactly, but unlike most men she had seen. His face was long, his lips plump, and his pale skin was a stark contrast to his dark hair and dark eyes. She had noticed his height when they first met, but it was even more apparent now that he was closer, even when he was sitting down. He looked too big for the stool he was occupying. Absently, she thought about what a problem it would be if anyone ever caught him on one of his missions, because he looked so unlike anyone else that someone could pick him out of a crowd with no problem.

“So who were they?” Ren said, breaking the silence.

Rey realized they had just been staring at each other for a few seconds and her blush returned. She wasn’t sure what he was asking. “Who were who?”

Ren glanced over to the three bodies lying on the floor of the bar.

“Oh,” Rey said. She briefly considered not telling him, but then realized he probably wouldn’t care if she kept it from him. “They were trying to make it big in the drug trade here,” she told him. “They made enemies with the wrong people.”

“Enemies who called up the J.C.” Ren said, looking at her questioningly.

Rey almost nodded in confirmation but stopped herself. She had almost slipped and confirmed to him that she worked for the Jedi Council. That was the second time he had tried to get information out of her and this time she almost gave it to him. The first time was easy, when he had just asked for her name. But this time, he had asked her so casually, it would have been easy for her to nod and give herself up.

“You’re good, Ren,” Rey said to him, her mouth twitching upward into a small smile. “But not that good.”

Ren returned her smile and took another sip of his drink.

“Finding me in a bar,” Rey continued. “Having a drink with me, the personal questions, flattering me with your not so subtle look overs, and then slipping the question in like it's meaningless. Really, I’m impressed. I see why you’re the darling of the K.O.R.”

Ren of course gave her no confirmation of her suggestion but rather finished the last sip of his drink and brought his glass back down on the counter. He seemed to be trying to contain a smile. “So do I get your name this time?”

Rey almost laughed at that. “And why would I give you my name?”

“Doesn’t seem fair that you have something to call me, but I don’t have a name for you, angel.”

“It seems you do have a name for me,” Rey said. She’d taken note of his endearment, trying to gauge whether it was a compliment or if he was being condescending. She’d decided to let it be for now.

Ren chuckled. “So does that mean you’re not going to give me your name?”

Rey considered him, and she realized she was smirking. In truth, she didn’t see the harm in giving him her name. Luke had stressed never giving her name out to anyone, but it almost seemed like a formality. There wasn’t much Ren could do with only her name. But she liked that she had something to hold over him, had something that he wanted but couldn’t have. It was satisfying that she had his name yet he didn’t know hers. She wanted to keep that satisfaction as long as she could.

“Maybe another time,” Rey said. She picked up her glass and threw back what remained of her blue blazer. Then she made to move out from behind the bar.

“So does that mean you want to see me again?” Ren asked her as he stood up.

Rey came out from behind the bar and made her way towards the exit, which was behind Ren. “That would be up to you,” she said and stopped in front of him. “You’re the one that found _me_ , remember?” She looked up at him. He really was much taller than her. At first she’d found that threatening, but now she couldn’t help but find it appealing.

He gazed down at her. “Until next time then.” He moved to the side so she could step past him.

Rey walked towards the exit, a small smile still on her face. So much in her head was telling her that seeing him again would be a bad idea. Kylo Ren worked with the K.O.R. He was an adversary of the Jedi Council. He was her enemy. But she was having a hard time caring about any of that at the moment.

Her hand was on the door to the exit when his voice came again from behind her. “Wait.”

Rey turned around and he made his way towards her. She stiffened when he came up close, only a few inches away. She craned her neck to keep eye contact with him, but he brought his face down next to hers and she felt his breath in her ear. His hand came to rest on her hip before moving around to the small of her back. Her breath hitched when she felt his hand move down into her back pocket. Realization hit her then. His hand moved down further and he fished his lighter out of her pocket and brought it back out. He stopped touching her then, and he moved his face back so he could look at her. He was still so close. Rey felt her face heating up.

Ren tucked the lighter into his back pocket and scanned her face. “Just so you know,” he said in a low voice. “I wasn’t looking at you to flatter you into giving up information.” His dark eyes met hers. “I just like looking at you.”

Rey knew her face was beet red. His gaze held hers for a moment longer before she let out a breath and turned towards the exit. Without offering any parting words, she walked out of the bar. The air outside was hot, doing nothing to relieve her already warm skin. She made her way to her car, and noticed a motorcycle parked about a hundred yards away. Ren probably parked there so she wouldn’t hear him show up. She unlocked her car and got in, turning it on immediately and blasting the air conditioner. She knew she stayed at that bar far too long and needed to leave. Every part of her mind was screaming at her to report this incident to headquarters, but he hadn’t interfered with her mission, and he’d made no threats towards her. But maybe she was just making excuses to hide from the truth.

She wanted to see him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we went from general dislike to light flirting. Hope the progression worked well. Thanks for reading!


	3. Tuesday

Rey could count on Finn for anything. A few days after her encounter with Kylo Ren in Texas, Rey approached Finn for a favor. More than once she had requested something of him and he had done it, no questions asked. This time was no different. She asked him to keep his eyes and ears open for any upcoming K.O.R. missions. Finn had once worked for the K.O.R. before he left to work for the J.C. She never really got the full story on why he made that decision, but she got the impression that some of the missions the K.O.R. ran were not exactly morally righteous, and that they’d gone too far for him to stick around. Not that the J.C. was completely honorable and just, but she had heard some horror stories about the K.O.R. and how far they were willing to go for their missions. But though Finn left the K.O.R., he still had some contacts on the inside that he would reach out to occasionally. Rey knew he would reach out to them for her if she asked.

Finn didn’t even ask her why she wanted the information; he just agreed to look into it. Rey appreciated this. She wouldn’t know what to say if he asked questions. Finn had been so kind to her since she joined the J.C. At first, she thought it was because he liked her. After all, he helped her without any reservations, and she always seemed to catch him looking at her from across the room, but he had never made any advances towards her at all so she figured she was imagining things.

As for Rey’s reasons for asking Finn this favor, she decided not to think on it too much. It was difficult to lie to herself about this. Part of her wanted to find Ren because he had been able to find her and catch her off guard. She wanted payback. But a bigger part of her just wanted to see him again. She tried to ignore that part.

Two weeks passed before she heard from Finn about her favor. He approached her as she left Luke’s office, having just come back from completing another mission.

“Hey, I’ve got something for you,” he said as he walked up to her.

Rey paused and waited for him to reach her. “What about?”

“That favor you asked,” he said. “I have something.”

Rey glanced back at Luke’s office. She couldn’t have this conversation here. She had a feeling Luke would not approve of her looking into the K.O.R. without his knowing, especially if he knew _why_.

“Walk with me,” Rey said to him. Once they were a safe distance away from Luke’s office, Rey glanced around the hallway to make sure no one was around. When she didn’t see anyone, she looked at Finn again. “What do you have?”

“New Orleans,” he said under his breath. “Mardi Gras. A few members of the K.O.R. are gonna be there.”

“What for?” Rey asked. She stared ahead, keeping her stride.

“It’s got something to do with the Louisiana governor,” Finn said.

“Are they gonna take him out?” Rey asked, that seemed the most likely outcome.

“I don’t know,” Finn said. “That’s all I was able to get.”

Rey nodded. This was much more than she had anticipated. “Thank you,” she said. “I owe you one.”

“No you don’t,” Finn said.

Rey sighed. He really was too good to be true. She stopped walking and he stopped with her. “You’re a good man, Finn.”

Finn shrugged. “You’d do the same for me.”

Rey put her hand on his shoulder and gave him a smile. “I’ll see you later, okay?”

He returned her smile and nodded.

Rey turned and began walking away, already thinking about how quickly she could get to New Orleans. Mardi Gras was less than two days away.

“Rey, wait,” Finn’s voice came again from behind her.

She turned back around. Finn was still standing where she left him. “What is it?”

He let out a breath. “I don’t know what it is you’re doing, and I don’t need to know,” he said. Then he bit his lip and she could see the worry in his eyes. “Just be careful, okay?”

Rey stared at him, her gratitude for him returning tenfold. It felt good to have someone who worried for her, someone who she could call friend.

“I will,” she said reassuringly. “I promise.”

Finn nodded, and he looked slightly comforted by her words.

Rey gave him another smile before turning around to head out of the building.

*****

Mardi Gras wasn’t exactly Rey’s cup of tea. She understood the appeal. Loud music, parades, dancing, and a lot of drinking, but it wasn’t for her. But she knew she had to go if she wanted to find Ren. It could be a while before Finn got any more intel about the K.O.R. That’s what motivated her to step outside her hotel room and head out into the New Orleans streets that morning. Mardi Gras was an all day party, and she knew it was going to take her some time to find who she was looking for. She had dressed for the part. Nothing on earth could have gotten her into the ridiculous outfits a lot of girls wear, but she had managed a nice pair of jeans and a purple tank top. She collected beads throughout the day, as was the holiday tradition.

She had looked into the Louisiana governor’s attendance. He would be making a speech at the start of one of the parades. Rey wondered if the K.O.R. would be taking him out during that speech. If they were, Mardi Gras would be ending early. That speech was to take place in the mid afternoon, but she kept her eye out for Ren all day, knowing he could be anywhere at any time.

Part of her mind kept reminding her that she didn’t even know for sure if he would be here. Finn could have gotten bad intel, or Ren might not be on this particular mission. But she knew that if the K.O.R. did send agents here, it would be logical to send Ren. After all, he was their best.

By the time the parade was about to start, she was amazed at how many people were already drunk. She’d had to shove off more than a few drunkards in the crowd around her who grabbed her ass. Getting drunk in the afternoon had never interested her, but she supposed people would make an exception for Mardi Gras.

She heard the sound of someone tapping a microphone, usually a sure sign that something was about to start. She looked to the stage set up on one of the floats. Sure enough, someone was there, tapping the microphone and trying to get the crowd’s attention.

_Good luck with that one._

The poor guy managed to quiet the crowd about one tick and let them know that the governor was about to make his speech. Part of the crowd hooted in response, the rest didn’t see to hear him.

Rey scanned the crowd again, looking for any signs of a K.O.R. agent. But it was difficult to pick anyone out of a crowd of green, purple, and yellow. Everyone was starting to blend together. She scanned the rooftops, where someone with a sniper rifle would usually be located, but most of the buildings surrounding the area were low, not ideal for a sniper mission. She scanned the windows of the buildings too but saw no one of notice. If the K.O.R.’s mission had to do with the governor, she would have thought it would involve the speech he was going to make.

There was more tapping on the microphone. This time it was someone a little less timid, and he successfully quieted the crowd with a few booming words into the microphone. Amazingly, the crowd quieted down. The man at the microphone was apparently one of the event coordinators for Mardi Gras. He thanked everyone for coming and started talking up the governor. After a few kind words, he introduced him, holding his hand out to the side, and the governor stepped on stage. He came on stage with an entourage of people. Rey took note of them, a lot of big guys in suits. And that’s when she saw him.

Kylo Ren was with him. He was standing behind the governor, wearing a suit and tie, looking very unlike how she had ever seen him before. Rey was taken aback. This wasn’t how she expected to find him. She wondered what his mission was, if he was gathering intel on the mayor, or if he was going to take him out, but in a less showy way than how she had seen him do it before. Slip him some poison, maybe.

Rey hardly listened to the governor’s speech, but apparently it was to the liking of the drunken crowd around her, because when it was over, they all cheered like they had just won the Super Bowl. But she had a feeling just about anything would get them excited at this point. When he was done, he made to move off the stage. Ren and the rest of the entourage followed him. Rey’s heart sped up. It had been a pain to find him, and she wasn’t going to lose him in a crowd like this. She hurriedly made her way through the crowd, sometimes shoving people aside so she could get through. The parade was about to start and she had limited time to get to the other side of the street.

Just as the music started up, she made it to the other side. She quickly scanned her surroundings for the governor before she spotted a group of security guards. She didn’t move. She knew she couldn’t just walk up to them and talk to Ren in front of the governor. She would have to wait. But luckily, it didn’t look like the governor was going anywhere. In fact, he was making his way inside the restaurant nearest to them. Perhaps he would be staying for the festivities. Rey spotted Ren’s dark hair moving away from her and towards the restaurant. She didn’t follow. She thought it better to wait before revealing herself to him.

Over the next few hours, she kept the restaurant in sight, but made sure to keep her distance. She watched the parade, and took part in some of the festivities, though she avoided the alcohol. She needed to make sure her mind stayed sharp. The governor didn’t leave the restaurant. She imagined he was inside, probably having a few too many drinks himself. Once it got dark, she was starting to get antsy. Spending the whole day at Mardi Gras hadn’t exactly been her plan. Needing a break from the constant party, she headed around the side of the restaurant the governor was in. Hopefully he wouldn’t leave while she was gone. The street she was on was a bit quieter, less rambunctious. It was good to be away from the noise for a few moments. Just she was about to turn back to the party, she noticed it.

A motorcycle. It was parked a few yards away from her on the street. Rey looked closer and realized it was Ren’s motorcycle. She recognized the model and license plate number. Rey quickly approached it and placed her hand on the handle. She was almost giddy at the sight of it. She briefly contemplated stealing it. It was a great bike, one she would like to have herself. But then she realized she would just have to wait here for him to come and get his bike. He was apparently leaving on his own and not with the governor. She grinned to herself at the thought of him finding her with his bike.

Rey swung her leg around and straddled his motorcycle. The seat was comfortable. She could see herself riding it for hours. She looked at the dashboard. Ren kept no keepsakes on it, which was unsurprising, but it was in great condition. A few people walked by her, but no one said anything. It was very obvious that this was not her bike but Mardi Gras was providing the perfect distraction.

She sat on the motorcycle for over an hour, distracted by her own thoughts. More than once she reconsidered stealing the bike, just out of sheer boredom. She was considering it again when she finally heard a familiar voice come from behind her.

“Hey! Get off my bike!”

Rey grinned at the sound and looked over her shoulder. Ren was approaching her rapidly, not close enough to see her face yet. He came closer and closer, his stride angry, until he could see her face and he stopped dead in his tracks.

For the first time since she first met him, Ren looked startled. It was satisfying to see him look like that, to see him feel the same way she felt when he surprised her in the bar. She loved that she was getting even with him.

“Oh, is this your bike?” Rey asked. There was laughter in her voice. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to try it out.”

Ren was clearly trying to regain his composure. He took a few steps closer to her. “What are you doing here?”

Rey smirked. That was the same question she had asked him when he found her in the bar in Texas. “I’ve heard great things about New Orleans. I wanted to check it out.” He hadn’t told her how he found her in Texas. She certainly wasn’t going to tell him how she found him here.

Ren was now standing next to the bike. She had to crane her neck to keep her eyes locked with his. He seemed to have regained his composure, because he smiled. “I guess I deserve that.”

Rey smiled at him in a way that she hoped got the words ‘yes. Yes, you do.’ across to him.

There was suddenly a large cheer from the crowd. They both glanced over at the figures partying in the distance. Rey was reminded of something then.

“What were you doing with the governor?” she asked him.

Ren turned back to look at her. He considered her question for a moment and shrugged. “He thought someone was trying to kill him. He wanted protection here.”

Rey’s eyebrows shot up. “He contacted _you_ for protection?”

“The way he saw it, the best people to protect him from getting killed are the people who usually do the killing.”

“Did someone try to kill him?” Rey asked.

“No,” he said. “Guys like him tend to get paranoid.”

Rey nodded in understanding. She had been on one mission where all she had to do was watch out for someone. She couldn’t help but find it painfully boring. She couldn’t imagine it was Ren’s thing either.

“It’s a good look for you.” Ren said, bringing her out of her thoughts.

Rey wondered what he meant for a moment before he looked at her then looked at his bike pointedly.

“Really?” Rey straightened up a bit, her hand reaching out to grab one of the handles. “I think you should consider giving it to me.”

“Not on your life, angel,” Ren scoffed.

Rey pouted at him. She realized that they were actually flirting.

“But I will offer you a ride,” he said.

Rey stiffened and glanced away from him. She wasn’t sure if that was a good idea. Talking to him was one thing, one very _stupid_ thing that she was pretty sure she’d pay for later, but getting on his bike and going somewhere with him was something else. She’d be allowing him to take her wherever he wanted, giving him the control. That wasn’t a good idea for a million reasons. She may like seeing Ren, but she knew better than to trust him.

“Hey,” Ren said lightly.

Rey looked at him.

“You don’t have to,” he said, and she could see the warmth in his eyes. “I get it. I was just offering.”

Rey considered him. There were a million reasons she should say no, but Ren hadn’t tried to hurt her since she’d met him, and he’d had plenty of opportunities. So despite the corner of her brain screaming at her to stop, she scooted back on the seat, giving him room to sit in front of her and gave him a nod.

Ren smiled and swung his leg over the seat, placing himself in front of her. He reached to the side of the bike and pulled out two helmets, reaching back to hand her one. Rey took it and placed it on her head.

“You’re gonna want to hold on,” Ren said as he buckled his helmet around his chin.

Rey scoffed and just took hold of the bottom of his jacket. She was wary of wrapping her arms around Ren’s waist and just didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of getting her to hold onto him.

She heard Ren laugh in front of her before he revved the engine and they took off. Rey gripped his jacket even harder as they sped up, trying to keep herself from falling off the bike. She was suddenly very grateful for the helmet. This wasn’t her first time on the motorcycle, but it was her first time not being the driver. She didn’t like it. She preferred to be the one in control, and it was much better when she had the handles to hold on to, and not just a person’s jacket.

Everything around her was going by in a blur. She saw flashes of people, of purple and green lights. Music and the sounds of people cheering and laughing were swirling all around her. The parties were still happening everywhere, but she couldn’t see any of them clearly. It was like being in a dream.

“You might want to hold on a little tighter!” Ren shouted at her over his shoulder.

Rey stubbornly kept her hands on the bottom of his jacket. “Thanks, but no thanks!”

She thought she heard him laugh but she couldn’t be sure. In the next instant, they came to a quick stop. Rey let out a loud squeak and her arms quickly went around Ren’s midsection, clutching him tightly and holding her face against his back as they screeched to a stop. When they finally came to a complete stop, Rey glanced up and saw the red light above them. She huffed.

Ren looked over his shoulder at her. There was a smirk on his face. “I did warn you.”

She pinched his midsection hard. “That was not a warning.”

Ren laughed again and the light turned green. He revved the engine and they were off. Rey held onto him tightly. She was suddenly very aware of his body. This was the first time they had ever touched like this. His midsection was hard, and his shoulders felt the same. His legs were long, and their size difference was even more obvious when she was so close to him. She tried not to imagine how he would look without any clothes on, but feeling his strong body like this was doing nothing to help her.

“Where are we going?” Rey yelled into his ear, if only to distract herself from her thoughts.

“We’re almost there!” he yelled back at her.

Rey huffed; annoyed at his non-answer, but it shouldn’t have been surprising. They rode for a few more minutes, as she continued to try and not think about his body pressed against hers, until they came to a stop. They seemed to have moved away from all the partygoers, as it was a lot quieter where they were stopped. Rey unwrapped her arms from Ren’s midsection and looked around. There were a few people in sight, but it was pretty desolate. They were right next to a body of water.

Ren took off his helmet and looked at her. “Lake Pontchartrain, one of the landmarks of New Orleans. Everyone should see it when they come here.”

Rey removed her own helmet and looked back at the lake. What he had just said was oddly…thoughtful. She swung her leg over the bike and hopped off. She moved closer to the lake. The sky was clear, and the moon was glistening on the water. It was her first time in New Orleans. When she traveled, it was usually for missions. She didn’t do a lot of sightseeing. It was odd to be taken somewhere like this just for fun.

There were footsteps coming up behind her. Rey tried not to stiffen as Ren stood beside her. She had come to New Orleans because she had wanted to see him. She expected more of what had happened in the bar in Texas a few weeks ago, but this was different. Something about this was more intimate than what she had expected, and she didn’t know how she felt about it.

“It’s beautiful,” she said quietly.

“I know,” he said.

Rey swallowed, unsure of herself. “Thank you for bringing me here.”

He didn’t say anything and Rey felt awkward. She didn’t really know what his intentions were in bringing her here. She wished more than anything that she could read his mind. But she did think of one thing she wanted to say.

“Do you want to know my name?” she asked.

Ren slowly turned and just stared at her for a moment. “Yes,” he said.

Rey licked her lips. She didn’t know why she was so nervous. But she felt like she was about to cross a bridge she couldn’t come back from. She opened her mouth to speak. “I’m—”

A horn blared from behind them and they both jumped. There was a car screeching to a halt right next to Ren’s bike. When it stopped, a number of drunken Mardi Gras partiers began pouring out. It seems they had decided to take the party to the lake.

Rey looked back at Ren. He still had his eyes on the partiers. Rey looked him over. She was just about to give him her name before they were interrupted. Suddenly, that was the last thing she wanted to do. She took a step back from him and he turned to look at her again, his eyes confused as he noticed her stepping away from him. Rey looked him in the eyes and shook her head. This was a bad idea. This whole thing had been a mistake. Coming here to find him, getting on his motorcycle, almost telling him her name, all of it. And he just had to go and take her to this bloody romantic spot. It was too much. This couldn’t happen.

“What is it?” Ren took a step towards her.

Rey backed up further. “I can’t, Ren.”

Ren’s eyebrows came together in confusion. He continued to come closer to her “What do you—?”

“Stop,” she told him.

He stopped moving towards her.

“I can’t,” she said with more assurance. “Don’t try and find me again. This can’t happen.”

Rey turned around then and walked away. He didn’t chase her. Part of her wished that he would. But she knew this was the right thing to do.

It had to be.


	4. Olivia and Jason

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A long chapter for you guys!

Rey adjusted the straps of her dress as she waited for her car to come to a stop. She felt nearly naked in what she was wearing. The black cocktail dress barely hit her mid thigh. The back of the dress was open, and she didn’t even have any tights on. Her heels were strappy and uncomfortable, but they did raise her a few inches, making her feel tall. The beauty expert at the J.C. had caked makeup on her face, and she was wearing her hair down, which she never did. It was all a costume, meant for the mission. Undercover missions were rare for her. This was only her third in almost ten months, but Luke had been adamant that he needed her on this mission. She hadn’t been in any position to argue.

A state senator of New York was holding the gala she was attending. It was probably the most exclusive party the J.C. had ever scored for a mission. But the state senator wasn’t her target. She was there for Anthony Burke, the Deputy Director of the FBI. Burke was a friend of the senator and would be attending the gala to support him, as it was an election year. He wasn’t as much of a public figure as the Director of the FBI, but this mission was still high profile enough that Luke wanted her on it. Her clothing and look had a lot to do with her target. He had a history of sleeping around on his wife with younger women. She was meant to catch his eye and get close to him. Then when she had the chance, slip poison into his drink. That was the mission. Simple enough, and nothing she hadn’t done before.

Her car stopped. Rey looked out the window and realized she had arrived. The gala was being held at the senator’s house, or rather, his mansion. The building was far too extravagant to be called a house. She took a breath and closed her eyes, getting into character, as a man in a uniform approached her door. When the door opened so did her eyes, and she gave the man in a uniform a smile. She stepped out of the car into the early evening air, her clutch in hand and her mind focused on keeping her dress from riding up.

“Thank you,” she said to the man as he closed her door behind her.

He smiled and tipped his hat at her in reply.

Rey turned to look at the mansion in front of her. She had never seen a home this big in her life. State senators were really living the high life. She took another breath before making her way to the front door. There were people around her, rich, high profile people. They gave off that aura. A few of them she recognized from the invitation list she’d had to study. It was important for her to fit in here, and to do that she needed to know who these people were.

When she reached the door, she quickly scanned the crowd inside. A number of people were chatting in the entryway. Burke wasn’t among them she realized after a look around, but she did see the senator. Richard Knight. A name, she thought, was meant for politics. She was fairly certain that had been done on purpose given that his father had been a state senator as well. He was chatting up a few of his guests in the corner of the entryway, his wife on his arm. There was no reason for Rey to approach him. He wasn’t the one she was here for. Instead, Rey made her way out of the entryway into what turned out to be the bar. Unsurprisingly, that was where a lot of people were headed.

It was by far the biggest bar she had ever seen in anybody’s home, and the nicest one she had ever been in. There were couches and tables and plenty of room for everyone to have their own space. Rey couldn’t help but be impressed. Like in the entryway, she scanned the people around her, looking for Burke. He wasn’t there, and she let out a small breath in disappointment. Maybe he was the type who liked to arrive fashionably late. She approached the bar, catching a few men staring at her as she walked. It didn’t escape her notice that she was dressed far more provocatively than most of the women at the party, but she was pretty sure that was the point. When she reached the bar she scanned the drinks lined up behind the bartender. Usually she wouldn’t drink on missions, but blending in was crucial to this one. She couldn’t exactly just stand around and wait for Burke to show up.

“What can I get you?” the bartender asked her.

Rey looked him over. He was young, a handsome guy. His hair was blonde and his eyes were blue. She gave him a half smile and leaned forward, playing her role.

“I’ll have a Jameson on the rocks,” she told him.

He straightened up a bit, surprised by her demeanor, but he returned her smile. “Coming right up.”

He moved to the other side of the bar to prepare her drink.

Rey glanced around her, looking for someone she recognized. Then she realized that next to her, sharing a drink with his wife, was James Walton. He worked with the FBI, so he was one of the faces she had to memorize before coming here. Surely he would know Burke.

“Excuse me?” Rey said to him.

Walton turned and looked at her, his wife turning her attention to her too. “Yes, can I help you?”

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” she said. “You probably don’t remember me, but I’ve just started working with Mr. Knight. I’m Olivia Blake. You might have seen me tagging along with Mr. Knight whenever he visits your office.”

Walton looked contemplative. He looked over her face again before giving a small nod. “I think I remember you.”

Rey smiled. That was the thing about espionage. You just had to be convincing enough. She made him believe they had met before just by putting the idea in his head. It would have been too awkward for everyone to admit that he didn’t recognize her.

“Well, I was just wondering if you knew when the Burkes would be arriving?” she asked him. “Mr. Knight was wondering.”

“Ah, well, I talked to him yesterday,” Walton said. “He said he had something to attend to before the party, and that he’d be arriving a little late.”

Rey nodded and gave him another smile. “Thank you.”

“Hey James! Julia!” A voice came from across the room. Walton and his wife looked to the source and Rey looked too. A man in who Rey recognized as one of Knight’s business associates had just entered the bar was waving them over.

Walton turned to her again. “If you’ll excuse me, please.”

Rey shook her head to indicate it was no problem. “Thanks again for your help.”

Walton took his wife’s arm and headed over to where Knight’s associate was standing. Rey watched them go.

“Your Jameson on the rocks,” came a voice from behind her.

Rey turned around to see the bartender placing his drink in front of her on the counter. She gave him an appreciative glance. “Thank you.”

The bartender nodded and headed to the other end of the bar to take more drink orders. Rey took a sip of her Jameson. She had to hand it to Knight. Clearly he had spared no expense, and that had certainly included the liquor.

Her drink in hand, Rey turned to face the crowd in the sitting area. Apparently it was going to be a while before her target arrived. Until then, she was going to have to blend in. Drinking alone wouldn’t do. After all, she was young. She would have to find some young man or woman to talk up if she wanted to look like she belonged here.

The guests were mostly of the older generation, which was unexpected considering their host. But a few of the sons and daughters of the guests were there; some of them were about her age or just a little bit older. She looked for one that could perhaps pique her interest. One man, she noticed, was tall and had dark hair. He had his back to her. Rey couldn’t tell if he was talking to someone or not. She liked that he was tall, and she willed him to turn around and face her. After a few moments of staring at his back, he finally turned around, and Rey almost dropped her drink.

Kylo Ren. There was no mistaking it. He was standing there with his hands in his pockets, and Rey couldn’t keep herself from staring at him despite how she was risking blowing her cover. He was wearing a suit, and his hair was neater than she had seen it before. It had been three months since she left him at Lake Pontchartrain in New Orleans and told him she couldn’t see him again. After doing that, she had felt remorseful, and even missed seeing him. But as time passed, she had decided that it was the right thing to do. Now he was standing on the other side of the room. Her first thought was that he had followed her again, how else could they have run into each other like this? Her mind was racing with possibilities.

Then there was a small part of her mind, a part she desperately tried to ignore, that was happy to see him again.

Rey didn’t take her eyes off of him for nearly a minute, and Ren finally looked at her. He did a double take, and when his eyes rested on her again, a wave of confusion and surprise came over his face. That made her think perhaps he hadn’t actually followed her here, as he seemed as surprised as she felt.

For a few moments, they simply stared at each other across the room, then Rey watched as his eyes moved down over her body, and she was suddenly very aware of how little of her skin the dress covered. The nakedness she had felt earlier returned. There was a blush creeping over her cheeks as she remembered his words at the bar in Texas.

_I just like looking at you._

His eyes came to rest on her face again and he started walking towards her. Rey’s breath hitched. She didn’t exactly want to talk to him in such a public setting, especially when she had questions for him. They would risk blowing her cover.

Ren kept his eyes on hers as he approached her. But he didn’t stop when he came close; he kept walking until he passed her, his shoulder brushing hers as he went. Rey knew well enough what he was communicating to her.

_Follow me._

Rey turned so she could watch him leave the room. She noticed he took a left when he passed the door. To keep from drawing any attention to herself, Rey waited a few moments before following him, throwing back the rest of her drink just before she went. She was going to need a little bit of liquid courage for this.

Trying to keep herself calm, she headed out of the bar room. She took a left just as Ren had when she left the room, and walked down the hall. There was no sight of him in the hall, so Rey continued to walk. This part of the mansion wasn’t crowded. There were doors on both sides, and she wasn’t sure if Ren was behind any of them. The sounds of the party got fainter as she kept walking.

Suddenly, she heard the door to her right open and a hand shot out and grabbed her arm, pulling her inside. Rey didn’t struggle. She knew it was Ren. She let him pull her into the room and push her up against the door when he closed it behind her. His hands were gripping her upper arms.

“What are you doing here?” he asked urgently, and Rey had almost forgotten how deep his voice was.

She swatted his hands off her arms and stepped away from him. “Stupid question,” she said. “What do you _think_ I’m doing here?”

Ren kept his eyes on her face. “You have a target here?”

“Bingo,” Rey said. “What, did you think I was here because I enjoy the company of these people?” She looked at the room he had pulled her into. It was a library, and there was a pool table in the middle of the room.

“You didn’t follow me here?” he asked.

Rey swung her head back to look at him, a shocked expression on her face. “ _No_ ,” she said. “I did not follow you here. Did _you_ follow _me_ here?”

Annoyance crept over his face. “No, I didn’t,” he said, his voice hard. “You made it pretty clear last time that you didn’t want me to see me again.”

Rey felt herself blush. Guilt washed over her. It was true. She had been harsh the last time she saw him. Told him not to find her and walked away from him just when she was going to tell him her name. It shouldn’t surprise her that he would be angry.

“I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “The way I left in New Orleans…that wasn’t right. I shouldn’t have done it.”

Ren’s expression softened as he considered her words. He let out a breath. “It’s fine. I’m not mad. I get why you did it.”

Rey gave a small nod. “It’s just…I’m…and you’re…” She couldn’t seem to get the words out.

“I know,” Ren said, and she believed him.

A sigh of relief escaped Rey’s lips. Ren kept his eyes fixed on her, and she noticed his gaze drop to her dress again. Despite what she had said to him months ago at the lake, she couldn’t help but enjoy having his eyes on her again. She could feel the guilt leaving her as she slipped back into the role she was playing.

“When I first saw you, I thought you had followed me here,” Rey said and walked towards the pool table. “Figured you wanted to see me again.”

Ren watched her as she lifted herself up to sit on the pool table. She crossed her legs, and was very aware of her dress riding up, revealing even more of her legs, but she didn’t pull it down this time.

“I did want to see you again,” Ren said and moved closer to her. “I just didn’t think you wanted to see me.”

Rey bit her lip and looked him over. “I did.”

He took another step closer so he was a little over an arm’s reach away. “Can I expect to see you again after tonight?”

Rey leaned back, her hands resting against the green of the pool table, and considered this. She was past thinking he was trying to get anything about the J.C. out of her. He barely ever talked to her about who she worked for. But that didn’t mean it was a good idea to keep seeing him.

“You didn’t tell me why you’re here,” Rey said. She wasn’t answering his question, she knew, but she only just remembered that she still didn’t know what he was doing here. She wondered if they would have the same target and run into the same problem as the first time they met.

Ren stiffened, surprised by her sudden inquiry. “Tell me who your target is,” he shot back.

Rey bit the inside of her cheek. So they were playing that game.

“Are you here to take someone out, Ren?” Rey asked, insistent. She wasn’t answering his questions until he answered hers.

Ren huffed, exasperated. “No,” he finally said.

Rey sighed in relief. So at least they wouldn’t run into that problem. “What are you here for then?”

“Tell me who your target is,” Ren said.

Rey almost groaned. Damn, he was stubborn, as stubborn as her. “Anthony Burke,” she told him. “Now tell me what you’re here for.”

“You’re gonna take him out?” Ren asked.

“ _Yes_.” Rey was getting impatient. “Ren, tell me why you’re here.”

Ren bit his lip and considered her. Finally, he huffed and answered her. “I’m here to retrieve something.”

“Retrieve what?” Rey asked, her interest piqued.

“I’m not going to tell you that,” Ren said, his voice unwavering.

Rey raised her eyebrows at him. “Does it have something to do with the senator?”

Ren just looked at her.

“Oh, come on, Ren,” Rey chuckled. An idea was forming in her mind, and before she had a chance to think on it, she was acting. Her hands moved up from behind her and rested by her sides instead. She uncrossed her legs and leaned forward while keeping her eyes locked on Ren’s face. She didn’t have much to work with in the breast department, but she took advantage of what she had. His eyes took in her movements, his gaze resting on her uncrossed legs. Without thinking, Rey reached forward and took his tie in her hand. Slowly, she started to draw him closer to her, her hands making their way up his tie. She pulled him until he was up against her legs. When he was close enough, she wrapped her legs around his waist, her ankles locking behind him. “You can tell me,” she whispered up at him.

Ren didn’t say anything, but he certainly wasn’t pulling away either. His breathing sounded uneven, and Rey knew what she was doing was having an effect on him. Taking advantage, she took his hands in hers and placed them on her hips, and then she placed her own hands on his shoulders. She felt one of his hands start to move around to her back, touching her bare skin.

He kept his eyes on her face and Rey leaned up. Their height difference was still substantial even with her sitting on the pool table. She brought her lips close to his, not quite touching, but enough so that she could feel his breath on her mouth. Her hands gripped his shoulders, pulling him closer to her.

“I can keep a secret,” she whispered against his mouth, still not quite kissing him, but on the very edge.

She felt the hand that wasn’t on her back move to her leg, moving under her dress on her thigh. He let out a soft moan that she was sure he didn’t want to make. Her legs tightened around him. He was unraveling. She could feel it and a smile formed on her lips.

Ren’s eyes flicked up to hers as his hand moved further up her leg. “You’re good,” he whispered to her. Then he leaned forward and kissed her cheek, just next to her mouth, and squeezed her thigh. “But not that good,” he said against her skin.

Annoyance washed over her and her smile fell. His words weren’t uneven. He sounded comfortable and sure of himself. That wasn’t the point of this. Did she have any effect on him at all? The way he was talking it seemed like he was in his right mind the whole time and he just went along with what she was doing so he could touch her. She hadn’t been controlling him at all.

She glared at him and he smirked at her. What made her madder was that she liked having his hands on her this way, and she could tell by the way he was looking at her that he knew it.

Just as she was about to shove him away from her and tell him off, the door flew open and they jumped apart. She unwrapped her legs from his waist quickly and he stepped back.

At the door was Richard Knight, and Rey suddenly panicked that he would throw her out of his party for this. She couldn’t exactly tell him the truth of what was happening. ‘Oh, no, Mr. Knight. We weren’t hooking up in your library. I was just trying to seduce information out of him.’ She had a feeling that wouldn’t be an appropriate explanation.

Knight stared at them for a moment in stunned silence. Rey held her breath, waiting for his response and then, surprising her, he chuckled. “Well, what are parties for, right?”

Rey and Ren both laughed, but it sounded forced in her own ears.

“Olivia Blake, right?” Knight asked her.

Rey nodded. The J.C. always did their job in establishing her cover.

“And Jason Hart, if I’m not mistaken.” He gestured to Ren.

“Yes, sir,” Ren said. “That’s me. I’m so sorry about this—”

“Don’t apologize,” Knight said. “I throw these parties for people to have fun, and well, you two looked like you were having fun.”

Ren smiled and Rey felt herself blush again.

“But if you don’t mind,” Knight said. “There’s something in here I need. So if you’d please…”

Rey hopped off the pool table and adjusted her dress, not needing Knight to say another word to tell them to leave. She made her way out of the room, throwing Knight an apologetic smile as she passed him. She heard Ren’s footsteps following her.

When the door shut behind them, Rey briefly contemplated punching Ren in the gut, but she had a feeling that would only satisfy him further, and she wasn’t going to give him that. Instead, she walked away from the door without glancing behind her to see if he was following.

But Ren’s damn long legs caught up to her in seconds and he was walking next to her. She glanced up at him. He looked smug, probably because he had been standing between her legs with his hand up her dress a few moments ago. She wanted to slap him.

“Shut up,” Rey told him.

“I didn’t say anything,” Ren said. She could hear the amusement in his voice.

“I know what you’re thinking,” she said.

Ren chuckled. They were approaching the bar. More people had shown up since they left. Surprising her, Ren reached over and put his hand on her waist, pulling her closer to him.

“What are you _doing_?” Rey hissed at him, trying to pull away. She was still mad, and didn’t want him touching her right now.

“We need to blend,” Ren said under his breath. He kept his hand firm on her hip. “Don’t be difficult. You know I’m right.”

Rey huffed. He was right. When she had first spotted Ren here, she had been looking for someone to chat with so she could keep her cover. But after what had just happened in the library, she didn’t really one to play nice with him right now.

Despite herself, Rey wrapped her arm around Ren’s waist, returning his gesture. Her mission was more important than her spat with Ren.

When they entered the bar room, Rey once again scanned the crowd for Burke. She didn’t see him. His absence was starting to make her nervous. Though she knew he was going to be late, what if he missed the evening all together? Then the J.C. would have to track him down somewhere else and she’d have to do this all over again.

Ren led her to the bar and sat on the stool there. Rey remained standing.

“What can I get you guys?” the cute bartender from before asked them. He smiled at her and Rey returned his smile.

“Bourbon,” Ren told him. He turned his eyes on Rey. “And you?”

“Nothing for me.” She gave the bartender another smile. She’d already had one drink at this party. It wouldn’t do to have another.

The bartender nodded and moved back down the bar.

Rey was watching him when she felt Ren’s hands on her hips again, bringing her closer so she was standing between his legs.

“Flirting with the bartender?” he asked her, his hands holding their grip on her.

Rey considered shoving his hands away, but she couldn’t cause a scene. So instead she put one of her hands on his shoulder. “Jealous?”

“Yes,” he answered.

Rey scoffed. He couldn’t be serious.

“So,” he said, his hands moved down from her hips to her thighs. “Olivia, huh?”

“That’s my name,” Rey said. They couldn’t exactly have a discussion about their fake names while anyone could hear them. She knew he was well aware that Olivia wasn’t her real name. “Jason?”

“The name of my father, passed down to me,” Ren said. His voice was serious, but she could see the humor in his eyes.

Rey chuckled, and the bartender returned with Ren’s drink.

“Your bourbon, sir,” he said, placing the drink on the counter.

“Thank you,” Ren said, picking it up and taking a sip.

The bartender moved away, and then Rey remembered what had happened in the library and her annoyance was back. She wasn’t about to let that go. She pinched Ren’s shoulder. “I’m not happy with you.”

Ren set his drink back down and his hand returned to her thigh, kneading her through her dress. He smirked. “I know.”

She glared at him. She was going to need a little more than that.

Ren sighed. “Do you want me to say sorry? Fine, I’m sorry. But it was a little difficult to say no to you.”

“You knew what I was doing,” she said.

“Of course I did.”

“You could have just said that when I grabbed your tie,” she huffed. “Clearly you were in your right mind the whole time.”

“I don’t know if I would say that,” he said. Then he dropped his voice so only she could hear him. “You wrapping your legs around me, now that threw me for a loop.” He squeezed her thigh to accentuate his point.

Rey blushed and picked up his glass of bourbon from the counter, taking a sip.

“I hope you’re not embarrassed that it didn’t work on me,” Ren said.

Rey placed the glass back on the counter.

“Most men would have given you anything you wanted the second you grabbed their tie.”

Now this she knew was true. Every time she had a mission to seduce information out of someone, she had been successful. Ren was her first miss.

“So how did you learn to do that?” Ren asked her.

Rey shrugged. “It’s something we all have to learn to do. You’ve done it, have you not?”

He nodded. “Many times. And you?”

“I have.”

“Men usually give you what you want?” he asked.

“Every time,” she told him. “And women too.” She’d seduced two women in her career so far.

“Sorry to tarnish your perfect record,” Ren said.

“You know, I find that it’s much easier to get things out of men than women,” Rey said, partly because it was true, but also to try and annoy him.

He surprised her by nodding. “I would agree.”

“You’ve been with men?” Rey asked. This wasn’t surprising. In their line of work, everything goes.

“Of course I have,” he told her, taking another sip of his drink. “Men will tell you anything the second you get on your knees for them. But women, women are smart. You’ve gotta make them forget their own name before they’ll tell you anything.”

“Do you always get it out of them?” Rey asked, she was curious about how good he was at this, since he had been so good at denying her.

“Every time,” he said.

“Do you think you could get something out of me?” she asked him. She wasn’t sure where she was going with this. Her mind was never clear whenever she was with Ren.

Ren’s eyes moved down her body before coming back up to rest on her face. “If you had something I wanted.”

She wasn’t sure what to say to that, but she felt her cheeks heating under his intense gaze. Her mind was flooded with thoughts of what he would do if she had something he wanted to know, and it looked like he was thinking the same thing.

Before she could say anything, something out of the corner of her eye caught her attention and she snapped her head to the side. Burke was there. He had arrived and was standing at the entrance of the bar. Suddenly her mission was pushed to the forefront of her mind. She turned to face Ren again and swatted his hands away from her legs.

“Go away,” she told him.

“And here I thought you were enjoying my company,” he said, his hand moving back to her hip.

Rey swatted his hand again. “Burke is here,” she said under her breath. “I need to look available, and I can’t do that with you groping me in front of him.”

Ren sighed and picked up his drink. He leaned in to whisper in her ear. “Keep your legs to yourself, angel. His wife is here.”

Rey glared at him and he smirked before walking away.

It took her less than five minutes to catch Burke’s attention. Once his wife left the room, all she had to do was stand at the bar and eye him, and he was coming over, offering to buy her a drink. She of course said yes. Burke was an older man, but still handsome. She felt Ren’s eyes on her the entire time she was talking to him. To piss him off, she leaned into Burke just a little bit too much, and made sure to throw in plenty of playful touches as she laughed at his jokes.

After a while of talking to Burke, she noticed Ren crossing the room, heading towards the exit. Rey was on alert immediately. She still wanted to know just what it was he was retrieving there. It had to have something to do with the senator. If she could get it instead, the J.C. could surely make use of it, and it would be an opportunity to one up Ren, which seemed too good to pass up.

Ren took a left when he walked out of the room, and Rey lost sight of him. She turned her attention back to Burke. The opportunity to slip the poison into his drink hadn’t arisen yet. She was looking for her opening. He was already a little bit tipsy, which was a good sign. He wouldn’t be as conscious of what she was doing.

He provided her the opportunity only moments later. Some man came up behind him and distracted him by asking how work was going. Without anyone noticing, Rey took the poison out of her clutch and poured the small vial into his drink, and then the vial was back in her clutch.

She stayed a few more minutes to make sure he took a few more sips of his drink. That was all she needed. Then she excused herself to the ladies room and left the bar. She wouldn’t be returning.

When she entered the hall, her eyes immediately sought Ren, but he wasn’t out there. She walked back down the hallway they had been in earlier, looking for anything out of place. He could be anywhere, but the way she saw it, if he was here for something the senator had, then an office or bedroom was probably where Ren would be. Once she was out of sight of the crowd, she began peeking into doors. She ran into one couple locked in the same position she and Ren had been in earlier, and quickly apologized and shut the door.

Eventually, she peeked into a room that had to be Knight’s office. She stepped inside and peered into the dark room. The moment after she stepped inside, the door slammed shut behind her and she jumped. She whirled around and Ren was standing there.

“What the hell are you _doing_ here?” he hissed at her.

Rey chuckled. He had asked her the same question the last time she followed him down the hallway.

“I want to know what you’re here for,” she told him.

“Get out,” he barked at her.

“Did you get it already?” she asked, ignoring his demands.

“I said get—”

There were suddenly voices on the other side of the door. A voice Rey recognized immediately as Knight, and he sounded like he was coming closer.

Before she could think, Ren’s hand was over her mouth and he was pushing her to the floor. They landed behind Knight’s desk in a tangle. Rey squirmed beneath Ren. He was huge, and it felt like he was crushing her flat. He propped himself up on his elbows so he wasn’t pressing the air out of her lungs. He kept his hand over her mouth and stared down at her, warning her with his eyes to keep quiet.

The door opened and she heard Knight’s voice. He was talking to some woman. Rey couldn’t place her voice.

“It’s not necessary right now, Richard,” the woman said to him.

“Are you sure? Because it’s really no trouble.” Rey heard the door opening just a little bit wider, but they hadn’t stepped into the room.

“I don’t want them if they’re not finished,” she said. “I just need your word that you will bring this to the floor next week.”

“And I will give you that,” Knight said.

Rey heard the door shut and she let out a breath in relief against Ren’s hand. Ren didn’t move until he heard their voices start to fade as they walked down the hallway, then he took his hand off her mouth.

“There are easier ways to get me on top of you, you know,” he said.

“Ha ha,” Rey said. She didn’t know what she did to deserve this, but whatever it was, she was sorry. For the second time that evening, Ren was between her legs. But this position worked much better in his favor than hers. “Did you get what you came for or not?”

Ren stared down at her, then, slowly, he shook his head. “Did you take care of Burke?”

Rey nodded, but she was surprised at what he told her. She had a hard time believing he didn’t get what he was after. “He’ll be dead within twelve hours.”

“Impressive,” he said. She felt one of his hands moving up and down her leg.

“Do you want to get off of me now?” Rey asked. He had made no move to roll off of her.

“Not particularly.” Ren smirked at her again.

The smug look on his face was too much for Rey to handle. She shoved Ren’s chest hard, pushing him to the side. She rolled with him until he was on his back and she was on top of him, straddling his waist.

“Much better,” Rey said.

Ren smiled. This position seemed to suit him as well. His hands moved towards her legs but Rey swatted them before he could touch her.

“You’ve been feeling me up all night,” Rey said. She placed her hands on his chest. “I think it’s my turn.”

Ren leaned back and rested his arms on the floor.

Rey smiled at his silent agreement and leaned down so her face was close to his. She began running her hands up and down his chest. Like when she was on his motorcycle with him, she could feel the hardness of his body through his shirt. While she touched him, she let her hair tickle his face, and her mouth and nose graze his jawline. Her hands moved under his suit jacket.

“I liked seeing you tonight,” she whispered to him. She looked at his face. He seemed like he was in a daze.

“Me too,” he said.

Rey smirked and rocked her hips into his. She heard him moan deep in his throat. Her hands continued to explore his torso.

“Tell me your name,” he said. He had asked her this before, but this was the first time he sounded pleading.

“I don’t know, Ren,” she said. “You did, after all, tarnish my perfect record.”

“Please,” he said into her ear.

Rey moved her face up so she could look at him. His gaze was intense on her face. She leaned down and kissed his cheek. “Not tonight.”

Then she got up off of him and moved towards the door.

“Are you serious?” Ren said from behind her.

Rey opened the door of the office and looked behind her. He was sitting up on the floor, looking at her incredulously. Rey winked at him and shut the door behind her.

Ren groaned in frustration. God _damn_ that girl was going to be the death of him. He had no idea why he allowed himself to get so wrapped up in her. But every time she was near him, he felt like his entire body was on fire.

He got up from the floor and walked towards the door. He shouldn’t have stayed in here so long. But it was a little bit hard to remember that when he had that girl sitting on top of him, touching him everywhere she could reach.

Once he was in the hallway, he let out a breath in relief. Then he reached into his jacket pocket to check for the flash drive. His hand found nothing. His pocket was empty. He checked his other pockets as his heart rate started to speed up. The flash drive had all the information about the bill Knight was going to bring to the floor, and plenty of other intelligence he kept on his computer. That was what he was meant to retrieve. Where had it—?”

The girl. Her hands had been all over his body. He remembered her hands moving under his jacket. She had actually pick pocketed him. Ren speed walked down the hallway, trying not to draw attention to himself. When he was out the front door of the mansion, he scanned the area for the girl, but she was nowhere to be seen.

He could have screamed right then and there. How was he supposed to explain this to Snoke? And he was _never_ going to hear the end of this from Hux. A girl actually pick pocketed him while feeling him up, and he let it happen. He wanted to laugh at himself.

The only thing that kept him from punching a hole in the nearest wall was the thought of seeing her again. She was probably feeling pretty proud of herself right now, but he wouldn’t forget this. If she wanted to play games, oh, he would play.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for all the comments. I hope you enjoyed the chapter.


	5. Rooftop

Ren huffed as he reached another dead end in his search. He leaned back in his chair away from his computer and stared at the ceiling. It had been difficult enough the first time he tracked down this girl, but doing it a second time was another thing. The J.C. was good. Hardly any information was ever known to leak out from them. Finding her the first time had been sheer luck. He wasn’t sure if he’d have the same luck a second time. He rolled his chair back to his computer and continued his search. This girl had stolen from him, ruined his mission, and he would be damned if he was going to let that go. She couldn’t hide forever. He would find her.

Telling Snoke what had happened after his failed mission three weeks ago had been by far the worst moment in his career, save maybe one. Snoke had been furious. His voice could be heard down every hallway as he screamed at him. By the time he was done, everyone knew what had happened on his mission, and he had been the butt of far too many jokes for his liking. Most people knew it wasn’t wise to laugh at him, but a few brave souls didn’t care.

“Still looking for your little minx?” a voice came from the door to his office.

Ren sighed, recognizing the voice and already dreading this encounter, and looked up. Hux was standing there, his infuriating smirk plastered on his face as always. Ren said nothing to answer his question and his eyes went back to his computer.

Hux stepped further into his office. “Perhaps it's best that you don’t see her again. She may get you to give up everything about the K.O.R. with one shag.”

“Was there something you wanted, Hux?” Ren asked, looking up from his computer. Hux wasn’t the kind of person you could ignore until he went away. He was an unwavering annoyance.

“Snoke sent me to tell you to file the reports from your last mission,” Hux said. “It’s not like you to forget. Maybe I should tell him what’s distracting you so much.”

Ren glared at him. Was this man-child seriously threatening to _tell on him_? “Try it. See what happens.”

There was a small break in Hux’s composure as Ren saw a flash of alarm cross his face. Ren smirked then and turned his attention back to his search.

But Hux was relentless as always. “I’d like to meet this girl of yours,” he said. “I feel she and I could have a good laugh about your stupidity. I’d like to hear her account of the mission. You said she felt you up under your jacket and you never once thought she might be stealing something from you?”

Ren squeezed the mouse of his computer so tightly that he was sure it was going to break. “Hux, either leave or stay here and help me find her.”

“Why would I do that? I already found her.”

Ren’s eyes snapped up to Hux’s face in disbelief. The smirk was back on Hux’s face as he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a slip of paper. He held it between two fingers in front of him.

Ren stood up from his desk and tried to reach forward and grab it, but Hux snatched it away just in time.

“Ah ah ah, Ren,” Hux said, his smirk growing wider. “You know better than that. Nothing is free.”

Ren almost groaned in frustration. He hated it when Hux held something over him. It had been a while since this happened.

“I’ll give this to you,” Hux said. “But you’ll owe me a favor.”

“That’s all you’ll tell me?” Ren asked. He didn’t like the sound of that. He would prefer to know what horrible task Hux was going to make him perform.

“That’s it,” Hux said. “One favor. No questions asked.”

Ren bit the inside of his cheek. He hated the sound of this. There were dozens of things Ren could imagine Hux making him do. The man wasn’t exactly known to be their cleanest agent. Ren had a feeling that whatever Hux would have him do, it might land him in trouble with Snoke. But he needed this information. He needed to see this girl again, and he had no idea if he was capable of finding her himself.

Hux was holding the paper out in front of him, and Ren reached forward and took it out of his hand. “Deal.”

*****

Rey tried to keep her breathing even as she looked through the scope at her target. Elena Hemming, a botanist who was responsible for the loss of life of numerous farms in the Midwest. One of the farms belonged to a company that didn’t take to kindly to having all of their crops ruined. That company reached out to the J.C. Luke had given her the mission. It was one of her more standard operations, so she was happy to take it.

Hemming was in a restaurant, sitting across from her husband at a table by the window. They were finishing up their meal. Rey was moments away from pulling the trigger and completing her mission.

Something hit her. Rey didn’t even realize what had happened until she was on the ground and someone was on top of her. She acted immediately; kicking whomever it was in the stomach. They recoiled from her, and she rolled out from under them. She hopped up to her feet and turned on her attacker, holding her fists up in case they came at her again.

When her attacker stood up, she recognized him immediately.

“ _Ren_?” she asked disbelievingly. “Ren, what the _hell_?”

Sure enough, Ren was standing there, tall and disheveled. She gaped at him, a million questions running through her mind. He was expressionless, not giving her any answers. He confused her further by moving to stand between her and her rifle.

“Ren,” she said again. “What are you _doing_?”

“My job,” he finally answered her.

Rey stared at him, wide eyed. He trying to keep her from taking out Hemming? Where the hell was this coming from?

She didn’t have time to dwell on it. She just knew one thing. Someone was trying to keep her from completing her mission, and she couldn’t let that happen. She had to act. Before she could think on it any further, she charged forward, bent forward, and rammed her shoulder into Ren’s stomach, effectively knocking the wind out of him. He stumbled backwards, and Rey took advantage of this by holding her foot out and tripping him. He was on the ground and Rey turned to her rifle. If she only had a few seconds, she would be able to take out Hemming.

Turning her back had been a mistake. She immediately felt Ren’s hand around her ankle and he pulled hard, bringing her to her knees. She turned around and tried to kick at him but he dodged her, continuing to pull her by the ankle closer to him. When she was close enough, she wrapped her arms around his neck and tried to put him in a chokehold, wanting to knock him out. He released her ankle and his hands went to her arms, trying to pull her away. She maneuvered herself so she was behind him, but he immediately took advantage and pushed himself onto his back, his large body crushing her under his weight. He pushed himself up and back down again so her head slammed against the concrete of the rooftop and she loosened her grip on him. That was all he needed to wrench her arms away from his throat and turn himself around so he was facing her.

Rey tried to punch him, her arms swinging out wildly, but he grabbed both of her arms and pinned them down next to her head. Then she tried to bring up her knee and jab him in the stomach, but she could hardly move her legs under him. He tightened his grip on her wrists. They were both breathing heavily, and Rey stared up at him, waiting for his next move. The look on his face was unexpected. He was staring down at her, not angrily, but almost tenderly.

He surprised her with what he did next. She felt him bring his knee between her legs and nudge them open, settling himself between them. Then he rolled his hips against hers, and Rey could feel the hardness in his pants. Unwittingly, a moan escaped her lips at the feeling of him. His eyes locked on her face at the sound, and Rey saw a smirk playing on his lips. That almost took her out of the moment until he moved his hips against hers again, a little harder this time, and she let out another moan against her will. He didn’t stop moving this time, rather he continued rolling his hips into hers, and Rey heard his own moans in the back of his throat.

Ren buried his face into her neck, placing sloppy kisses all over her skin. Rey’s breath was coming faster now, and she wrapped her legs around Ren’s waist, urging him on. Taking his cue from her, he removed his hands from her wrists and began touching her, his hands moving from her breasts to her legs and everywhere in between. Her hands free, Rey buried them into his gorgeous head of hair, something she had been thinking about doing since she met him. His hair was soft and fine. She pulled at it and she heard him groan against her throat.

Rey was moving with Ren now, her hips rising to meet his. She could feel herself getting wetter with his every thrust, and she heard her moans getting louder. He brought his face up from her neck and pressed his forehead against hers. Their eyes locked. Rey felt herself getting hotter under his gaze. His hands were driving her mad. One was running all over her leg, teasing her skin at the waistband of her pants. The other focused on her breasts, squeezing and cupping them through her shirt. Rey’s hands were on the move too. They were on his back now, her nails digging in so hard she was sure he’d have scratch marks on his back.

“ _Ren_ …” she moaned out. It was a plea.

His eyes changed in realization. Rey closed her eyes as she felt his hand move down from her breasts and join his other hand at her waist. His hands began to make work of the button of her pants.

That’s when everything came back to her. The mission. Hemming. Her eyes snapped open and she unwrapped her legs from Ren quickly before shoving him off of her. He hadn’t been expecting it, so he rolled off easily. She hopped up from the ground and practically leapt to her rifle. She looked through the scope that was already trained on Hemming’s table in the restaurant.

Hemming was gone.

“No,” Rey said under her breath. “No, no, no…”

She wrenched herself away from her rifle and groaned loudly in frustration. She slammed her hands down on the ledge of the roof, the pain from the impact hardly registering in her brain.

This was a blunder of epic proportions. She’d let a target get away from her when she was _right there_. She’d had Hemming in her sights, and she’d slipped right past her. How the hell was she going to explain this to Luke?

‘Sorry, I couldn’t take out the target. I got a little distracted by an enemy agent pushing me to the ground and dry humping me.’

That, she had a feeling, would not fly with Luke.

She was still staring over the ledge when she felt Ren’s arms wrap around her from behind and pull her against him. She didn’t fight his embrace, though she was furious with him.

He leaned in close and kissed her temple.

“You ruined my mission,” Rey told him, as if he didn’t already know.

“I know,” he said.

“ _Why_?” she asked.

“You’re really asking me that?” Ren chuckled against her skin.

Rey swallowed. She knew, of course, what he was talking about. She had taken the flash drive off of him when they last met. The J.C., it turns out, did make use of the information. She didn’t regret it. At least, she didn’t before tonight. She knew Ren would be mad, but she hadn’t expected him to try and get back at her.

Ren’s hands were moving on her again, and she could feel his hardness poking against her backside. He was trying to bend her over against the ledge. Apparently he wanted to finish what he started.

Not having any of that, Rey elbowed him and turned around in his arms. She tried to pull away but he kept his grip on her, his hands pulling her hips into his. They were so close that Rey’s neck hurt from the strain of looking up at him.

“How did you know I was on this mission?” Rey asked him, her voice angry.

“I have my sources,” he said. “When I discovered your target, I contacted her, and offered my services.”

Rey’s mouth dropped open. “She hired you?”

“I did tell you I was doing my job, angel,” he said.

Rey shoved his chest, furious at him. He had actually gone out of his way to warn her target, and become her personal bodyguard. That far surpassed what she had done to him. “You piece of _shit_.” She shoved his chest again.

Ren kept his grip on her firm and pushed her harder against the ledge. She hated how her body responded to him, how she was still wet for him, how every part of her was screaming at her to tear his clothes off and have her way with him.

Ren was looking at her like he knew exactly what she was thinking, and Rey blushed furiously. She reached up and pulled his hair. She meant to hurt him, but in doing so she brought his face closer to hers until they were only a breath away. Her eyes dropped to his mouth. His lips were full, fuller than any man’s lips had a right to be. He smirked at her when he noticed her staring.

Losing all sanity, Rey stood up on her toes and crashed her lips into his. He had been ready, his mouth responding immediately. She didn’t want tenderness, and he didn’t give it to her. His tongue pried her mouth open and their teeth clashed. Rey pulled his hair harder, only encouraging his already insistent mouth. She felt his hand move to her backside as his tongue explored her mouth. It was like he was trying to consume her. Not to be outdone, Rey bit his lip, and she heard him groan, a sound Rey would never get tired of hearing, she decided. It made her feel powerful to hear him make that sound for her.

For the second time, Rey shoved Ren off of her. She had managed to hold on to some semblance of thought while he had been ravaging her with his mouth. He stumbled back a few steps and looked at her curiously when he caught his balance.

“Don’t do that again,” Rey told him, trying to keep her voice from breaking. She was still out of breath from his kiss.

Ren raised an eyebrow. “You kissed me, angel.”

Rey blushed. “ _No_ ,” she said. “I meant don’t show up on my missions again.”

He smirked. “Are you sure about that?”

“ _Yes_.”

“Because I got the distinct impression that you were enjoying my company a minute ago,” he said and glanced at the ground, where he had been on top of her.

Rey felt herself growing redder. “You were keeping me from my mission.”

“Certainly took you a while to push me away.” He was chuckling now.

Everything he said only made Rey angrier. She stepped forward and glared at him. “If you ever interfere with one of my missions again, you’ll regret it.”

“I was just getting even, angel,” he told her. “Tit for tat.”

Rey came close to slapping him, but she thought better of it. Instead, she turned around and began walking away from him.

It didn’t surprise her when she heard his voice come from behind her. “So when _can_ I see you again?”

Rey turned around again, despite her mind yelling at her to walk away and ignore him. “How about never? Does never work for you?”

Ren moved closer to her. “Don’t pretend with me, angel,” he said. “You kissed me, remember?”

Rey clenched her jaw. There was no making up an excuse for that. Ren was seeing what she had been trying to hide for months. She wanted him.

Ren reached out and brushed a lock of hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear. Rey shied away from his touch, but he moved closer. She could feel his breath on her face as he leaned in closer.

“Don’t be afraid,” he breathed out. “I feel it too.”

His eyes were locked on her face. She could feel herself trembling under his gaze. She knew he was waiting for her consent, for an invitation, and she wanted to give it to him, oh how she wanted to give in. 

Rey leaned forward and pressed her lips against his again. It was a small kiss, not fast and consuming like their first had been. She kept the kiss light, before pulling away. Ren had closed his eyes when she kissed him, and he slowly opened them again. 

“Don’t show up on my missions again,” she said.

She walked away then, and didn’t turn back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Thanks again for all the comments!


	6. Win-Win

“It’s simple enough,” Luke said. “You go in, you plant the bug in his office, and you get out. Is that clear?”

“Yes, sir,” Rey said. She was at the end of her briefing with Luke. He typically kept these short, which was her preference, but in the last few weeks, he had been holding her on a shorter leash, not wanting her to slip up again.

“This is a mission I would have given you when you just started,” Luke said. He raised his eyebrows at her pointedly. “So I don’t expect any mistakes.”

“Yes, sir,” she said again. She hated that his trust in her had defused. She was his best agent, and she didn’t want to let him down. “This won’t be a problem.”

Luke nodded at her. “Okay. Then that’s all I have for you.”

Rey gave a small smile and moved towards the door, but just as she reached for the knob, the door opened and Rey stepped back in surprise.

Standing there was Leia Organa, Luke’s sister and one of the heads of their organization. Rey was shocked to see her. Leia didn’t usually pay them visits, but rather managed things from afar. Rey had only met her on one other occasion, when she was first recruited.

“Ms. Organa,” Rey said, surprise apparent in her voice.

Leia looked her over. “Rey, correct?”

Rey nodded at her. She was surprised that Leia remembered her name, though she did get the feeling that she had liked her a lot when they first met.

“Leia,” Luke spoke up from his desk. “This is a surprise.”

Leia turned on her brother. “Yes,” she said. “But I needed to speak with you.”

“And it isn’t something that could have been addressed over the phone?” Luke asked with a glance at the cellphone sitting on his desk.

“No,” Leia said. “It isn’t.”

“Uh, I’ll just—” Rey was already feeling awkward with the obvious sibling tension, and started to move out of the open door.

“No,” Leia said. Her hand shot out in front of Rey and blocked her path. “I’m afraid this concerns you too, Rey.”

Rey swallowed. Despite Leia’s short stature, Rey couldn’t help but find her intimidating. She carried herself with a confidence that Rey admired. But she also didn’t want to be a part of this conversation. What could Leia possibly need to say that had anything to do with her?

“Okay,” Rey got out. Leia put her arm down and Rey closed the door to Luke’s office. She moved to the chair in front of Luke’s desk and took her seat. Leia remained standing.

“What’s this about, Leia?” Luke asked his sister.

“These run-ins with the K.O.R.,” Leia said. “They need to stop.”

Rey tried her best to not react, and she almost gasped as soon as the words left Leia’s mouth.

“How exactly are they continuing to find us on missions?” Leia asked. “Unless they have someone on the inside.”

“Are you suggesting we have a mole, Leia?” Luke asked.

“It’s foolish to assume we don’t have one,” Leia said. “They’ve disrupted two of our missions now, and we can’t allow this to continue.”

Rey was clenching her jaw. She stared blankly at the wall over Luke’s head.

“Rey,” Leia said. “Both of the missions the K.O.R. has disrupted have been yours.”

“I know ma’am,” Rey said quickly. Her voice sounded worried in her own ears. “I’m sorry but it’s just—”

“I’m not looking for an apology, Rey,” Leia said. “I’m looking for some answers. Was it the same person both times who disrupted your mission?”

Rey swallowed. “I…” she said, then she cleared her throat. “I can’t be sure. The first time, I only saw him from a distance on a rooftop.” The lie tasted like vinegar in her mouth.

“And the second time?” Leia prompted.

“I got a good look at him then,” Rey said, thinking back to the rooftop a few weeks ago. “It may or may not have been the same man from the first time.”

“And you said he attacked you, and while you were fighting, your target left the location, correct?” Leia asked.

Rey blushed as she thought back to the mission, and what Ren had done to distract her from taking out Hemming. “Yes,” Rey lied. “That’s what happened.”

“How did you know he was a K.O.R. agent?” Leia asked. “That’s what you put in your report.”

Rey swallowed. “He fit the description of one of the agents I’ve heard a lot about,” she said. “Kylo Ren.”

Leia bit her lip and Rey saw a flash of uneasiness cross her face, but it was gone in a second. Leia turned her attention back to Luke. “This can’t go on.”

“I’m well aware,” Luke said. “But what do you propose we do about it?”

“Tighter security,” Leia said. “And I want you to look into anyone who you just recruited in the last year. See if any of them could be a mole.”

Luke leaned forward in his chair. “Leia, I don’t think anyone we have here would betray us like that. You and I handpick all of these people.”

“I’m well aware of that,” Leia said. “But I still want you to do it.”

Luke sighed, and then nodded. “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thank you, Luke,” Leia said. Rey thought she looked relieved. “And Rey.” She turned her attention back to her. “Keep your eyes open. We can’t have this happening again.”

Rey nodded.

“Now, if you would excuse me and my brother, please,” Leia said, glancing at Luke. “There’s something we need to discuss in private.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Rey said, all too eager to get out of there. She tried not to sprint out of Luke’s office, but when she shut the door behind her, she let out a breath in relief. That had been too much. Leia was suspicious, and she was passing that suspicion onto Luke. She and Ren and drawn too much attention to themselves while running in on each other’s missions. Her anger from that night on the rooftop came back to her. She moved down the hallway, wanting to get away from Luke’s office.

“Rey!” she heard a voice come from behind her. She stopped and turned around, only to see Finn coming towards her.

“Finn,” she said when he reached her. “What is it?”

“I got this for you,” he said, holding up a piece of paper in front of him.

“What is it?” Rey asked, confused.

Finn glanced around; there were a few people within hearing range. He held out the paper towards her. “Here, just look at it.”

Rey took it from his hand and unfolded it. She scanned the paper and quickly realized what it was. He was giving her intel on an upcoming K.O.R. mission.

“Finn, why are you giving this to me?” Rey asked.

“Well, you asked for it a few months ago,” he said. “Ever since then, I’ve kept my ear to the ground for anything new, and after what happened on your last mission, I thought you might want this.”

Rey understood then. Finn thought she would want to get revenge on the K.O.R. for ruining her last mission. “Thank you, Finn,” she said. “I don’t know yet what I’ll do with this, but thank you.”

Finn smiled and turned on his heel to walk back to his office.

Rey looked at the paper again. The mission was in Las Vegas. The agent on the mission was meant to engage with one of the drug lords there. It wasn’t a kill mission. Whoever it was on the mission was just meant to be gathering intel.

It was true that Rey was still angry with Ren for what he had done on her last mission, but that didn’t make it a good idea to see him again. She continued walking towards her office. If she ruined his mission, he would only come after her again, and she couldn’t have that. Not with Leia getting suspicious. But she didn’t necessarily have to foil his mission to get back at him.

An idea was starting to form in her mind.

*****

It didn’t take long before Blue, one of Vegas’s most infamous drug lords, took notice of Rey. She’d shown up in the club just before he arrived, dressed to impress with her black leather pants and a low cut top. She needed him to notice her if this was going to work. And notice he had. He had waved her over and brought her to his private quarters in the back of the club. They were shielded from the other club goers by sheer red curtains. Her legs were draped across his lap and she gave him his desired attention while he conducted his business. They were sitting in a rounded booth, so people could sit on both sides of them. Blue kept his hand firmly attached to her hip. He wasn’t a bad looking man. A little stocky and prickly to be her type though. She kept her ears piqued for anything interesting he might be sharing with his colleagues. It was a lot about their competitors, apparently there was a recent territory dispute between him and another drug lord.

“Someone else is here to see you, sir,” one of his associates said from the entrance of the curtain after two other men had walked out.

Blue nodded. “Send them in.”

Rey’s hand was running over Blue’s chest. She was struck by how easy it would be to pick pocket him. He was clearly enjoying the attention she was giving him, but most of his focus was on his business.

“Mr. Blue,” a voice said from across the room.

Rey recognized the voice immediately and had to do her best to keep herself from grinning. She glanced towards the entryway and sure enough, Ren was standing there, dressed casually in a leather jacket and jeans. He had his eyes on Blue. He hadn’t taken notice of her yet.

“You must be Phoenix’s man,” Blue said.

“It’s Cal,” Ren said.

“Well, don’t just stand there,” Blue said and gestured to the booth. “Sit down.”

“Yes, sir,” Ren said and took a few steps forward. That was when his eyes finally moved to Rey’s face. He stopped in his tracks, stunned. Rey saw the shock wash over his face and she couldn’t help but smirk at him. He recovered quickly, his eyes moving back to Blue and moving to sit next to him in the booth. Rey was impressed. He fell back into character easily without Blue noticing his slip up.

“What do you have for me?” Blue asked him.

“I’m here to negotiate,” Ren said. “That’s why you agreed to meet with me, is it not?”

Blue sighed. Rey felt his chest rise and fall under her hand. “I suppose, but I don’t see what there is to negotiate about,” he said. “Phoenix has been pushing on my territory. That needs to stop. End of story.”

“Your territory extends to the county line,” Ren said. “Other counties are fair game.”

Rey was keeping her eyes on Ren through this whole conversation, and she noticed that he glanced at her just enough so that Blue wouldn’t notice anything. As they kept talking, Rey walked her fingers across Blue’s chest, then leaned in close to his neck and started trailing kisses up towards his jawline. He didn’t try to stop her. If anything, he was holding her a little tighter. As she was kissing Blue’s neck, she looked out of the corner of her eye at Ren. He was doing a good job of keeping a straight face, but Rey could see that his jaw was clenched and when she looked down she noticed he kept curling and uncurling his fist. What she was doing with Blue was bothering him, and that was exactly what she wanted.

This idea had come to her when she remembered Ren’s reaction to her flirting with the bartender on her mission to take out Burke. He’d said he was jealous. Rey had laughed it off at the time, but that turned out to lead her to the perfect way to get back at him. She wasn’t going to ruin his mission like he had done with hers. That would lead to nothing but endless back and forth revenge between them. Instead, she went for a more personal attack. It had been obvious since he ruined her mission on the rooftop that this thing between them was little more than harmless flirtation. He wanted her, that was obvious, and that was something she could use. Seeing her with another man bothered him, and she was glad.

“Excuse me, Mr. Blue?” his associate at the entryway interrupted them.

“What is it?” Blue asked, annoyance in his voice.

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but someone called the bar for you. They’re saying there’s an issue at the plant.”

He had Blue’s attention then. “Okay, I’ll be right there.” He looked at Ren. “I’m sorry, do you mind?”

“Not at all,” Ren said. Rey could still see the tension in his jaw. “Please, take your time.”

“I’ll be right back, darlin’,” Blue said to her.

Rey moved her legs off of his lap but leaned forward so she could capture his lips with hers. He kissed her back without hesitation, his hand burying in her hair as he shoved his tongue into her mouth. When they parted, Rey could see Ren over Blue’s shoulder and could tell that he was fuming.

“Hurry back,” Rey whispered to Blue.

Blue smiled and left the booth.

Ren waited until the curtain was closed behind Blue before he turned his glare on Rey. “What are you doing?” he asked.

Rey smiled at the anger in his voice. “What?” she asked. “I’m not getting in your way, am I?”

He moved closer to her in the booth, invading her personal space. “Is this your way of getting back at me?”

“Yes,” Rey said. His face was only inches from her own. “And I can see that it’s working.”

Ren glared at her for a moment before leaning even closer. “I’m going to make you a promise right now, angel.” His hand moved to her leg and he gripped her tight. “When I’m finished here, you’re going to tell me your name.”

Rey scoffed at him. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, _Cal_.”

“Oh, I intend to keep it,” he said.

Rey tried to slap his hand off her leg but he held his grip. He leaned closer so that his mouth was at her ear.

“I see you looking at me while you touch him and let him paw all over you,” he whispered. His hand moved further up her leg. “I know you wish it was me, but don’t worry, angel. I’ll fulfill that wish later.” He nipped her earlobe.

Rey was about to shove him away from her indignantly but Ren moved back himself, sliding away from her in the booth. She simply glared at him for a moment before she heard the curtains slide open and Blue stepped inside to join them again.

“I’m sorry about that,” Blue said.

“It’s no problem,” Ren said easily, right back in character. “I just hope everything’s okay at your plant.”

“It’s fine.” Blue settled himself back between Rey and Ren. “Just a misunderstanding is all.” Blue wrapped his arm around Rey’s waist again and pulled her close. Rey draped her legs across his lap again and leaned against him, Ren’s eyes watching her the whole time.

“Well, I’m glad it was cleared up,” Ren said, a small smile on his lips. “Now, where were we?”

As the rest of their conversation droned on, Rey continued to play her part. She touched Blue where she knew he wanted and kissed his neck when she felt the inclination. Her eyes remained on Ren, and he stole glances at her in return. But he didn’t look angry anymore. Now he was looking at her with heated anticipation, a look that made Rey feel hot and flushed. She was frustrated at this turn of events. She came here to get back at him, not for him to turn this game around on her, something he seemed really apt at doing.

Their conversation was winding down. Rey could tell Ren was getting ready to leave. Most of the issues they had been discussing had apparently been resolved.

“It was nice meeting you, Mr. Blue.” Ren extended his hand for Blue to shake.

Blue unwrapped his arm from around Rey’s waist so he could shake Ren’s hand. “Likewise. I’m glad we could work most of this out.”

“I’ll relay our agreement to Mr. Phoenix,” Ren said. He stood up from the booth “And he’ll be getting back to you.”

Ren turned then and walked towards the entryway. Rey watched him as he went, and when he reached the curtain, he turned back for one last glance before walking out and closing the curtain behind him.

Rey let out a breath. Having him gone was something of a relief.

“That should be my last meeting of the night,” Blue said, turning his attention towards her. “Now, why don’t we discuss something other than business?”

Rey recognized the look in his eyes. He wanted to take her home with him. That was not happening. But still, she smiled, playing along. “How about one more drink first?” she asked.

Blue nodded in agreement and Rey reached over to the table in front of them, which held a number of wine glasses and bottles. She picked out a bottle of white wine and poured it into two glasses. Then, without Blue noticing, she slipped a substance into Blue’s drink and handed it to him.

“Cheers to you,” Blue said and drank from his glass.

In less than ten minutes, Blue was so intoxicated he didn’t even recognize her. The substance she had given him was meant to speed up the drinking process, and it had certainly worked. She told his associate at the entryway that Blue had had a few too many and needed to go home. Then she left him.

Rey scanned the club for Ren when she reached the common area, but the place was still packed. She opted to go out the back exit in case he was still lurking around somewhere. She moved past the bathrooms and into the hallway that led to the exit.

It didn’t really surprise her when she saw Ren standing there, blocking her path.

“The back exit was an obvious choice, angel,” he said and stepped closer to her.

Rey crossed her arms over her chest and raised her eyebrows at him. “Am I supposed to be scared?”

Ren grinned and sidled up right in front of her. “Scared? That’s not the emotion I was going for.”

“What about annoyed? Exasperated? Miffed?” Rey listed off a few of her current feelings.

“And why would you have those feelings?” Ren asked. “After all, you’re the one who chose to come here.”

“I didn’t exactly achieve the desired results,” Rey told him.

“And what would those have been?” he asked. “Did you want me to screw up my mission by getting distracted by you?”

Rey shrugged. “I didn’t care about that.”

“So what?” he said. “You just wanted to piss me off by hanging all over that scumbag?”

Rey stared at him for a moment before giving him a small, curt nod.

Ren moved his face close to her. “Well, you did,” he said under his breath, and then he stooped down, planted his shoulder firmly in her middle, and swung her up and over his shoulder.

“Ren!” Rey yelled at the small of his back. “What the _hell_?”

“I made you a promise, didn’t I?” Ren said and began walking them down the hallway and out of the club, one arm clasped over her thighs and the other swinging to his side.

Rey’s stomach flipped at his words, and her mind was flooded with ideas of what he planned to do.

Ren stepped into the warm night air in the alley. Rey noticed they were passing a few parked cars before Ren swung her back over her shoulder and sat her down. She glanced down and realized she was sitting on his motorcycle. She didn’t have time to say anything before Ren’s mouth came crashing down on hers. He had to lean down pretty far to kiss her when she was sitting on the bike. She clutched at his shoulders, kissing him back. Absently, she realized that this was the first time he had initiated a kiss. She had been the one to kiss him both of the previous times.

His hands moved down to cup her breasts and Rey gasped at the contact, allowing him to invade her mouth further. Not content to sit anymore, Rey stood up so he wouldn’t have to bend so far to kiss her. He immediately pushed his hips into hers, her backside hitting the bike as he leaned into her. Rey could feel his hardness through his pants, and she was already so wet for him. She buried her hands in his hair, tugging at it and urging him on.

Ren wrenched his lips away from hers. She protested, trying to bring him back to her mouth.

“Your name,” he said roughly. “What is it?”

Rey stared at him, considering her answer. She knew she couldn’t keep it from him forever, but perhaps just a little bit longer. She shook her head at him in response.

He practically growled at that, latching his teeth onto her neck and Rey groaned, holding him closer to her. He ground his hips into hers and she heard her moans becoming louder.

“Where’s your car?” he groaned against her neck.

Rey could barely form a coherent thought, but she managed to pull herself together enough to remember where she had parked. “It’s that way,” she said, pointing further down the alley.

Ren reached down to her legs and lifted her up. She wrapped her legs around him helpfully, and he began walking her down the alleyway in the direction she had pointed him in. He kept kissing her, and Rey was trying to keep some of her attention on the cars they were passing. When she saw hers, she patted his shoulder.

“That one,” she said against his lips and pointed at the car.

Ren moved them towards the car and Rey tried to dig into her back pocket for her key. When she found it, she pressed the button to unlock the doors and Ren opened the backseat of her car and placed her on the seat inside. Rey immediately moved back on the seat, trying to make room for him. Ren entered the car and Rey was struck again by how large he was. Maneuvering around in her car was going to be difficult. He shut the door behind him and she locked the door with the press of a button. Then he leaned over her on the seats.

Rey stared up at him. Her heart was racing. A part of her knew this was a very bad idea, but the rest of her didn’t care. She wanted Ren. She’d wanted him since the first moment she saw him.

He leaned down and kissed her again, almost tenderly, and Rey started clawing at his jacket, wanting his clothes off. He obliged her and yanked off his jacket and then pulled his shirt over his head. Rey’s hands immediately went to his chest. She knew he was built. She had been able to tell in the many times they’d touched, but seeing him was something different. She wanted to kiss and touch every inch of him. She leaned up and began placing kisses across his chest.

Ren’s hands tugged at her own shirt impatiently, so she leaned back and allowed him to pull her shirt off. She wore nothing underneath, and she heard him give a small groan in approval. His mouth went to her chest, kissing and sucking at her breasts. She ran her hands all over his back and chest, touching every part of him she could reach. It wasn’t long before she felt his hands moving to her pants and tugging them down along with her underwear. She lifted her hips helpfully, and kicked them off when they were far enough down her legs. As soon as she kicked them off she felt him begin caressing between her legs. Loud moans escaped her lips at the feeling, and she cried out when she felt two fingers slip inside her wetness. He watched her face as he thrust his fingers in and out of her slowly, his eyes taking in her every reaction.

“ _Ren_ , please,” she moaned out after a particularly deep thrust, and she hardly recognized the sound of her own voice.

Ren reached down with his other hand and she heard the sound of him fiddling with his belt buckle. A shudder of anticipation went through her as he pulled his pants down over his hips. His fingers came out from inside of her and he lined himself up with her entrance. He pushed himself closer, and she felt just the tip of him inside of her. The feeling of him so close was killing her. She grasped his shoulders and wrapped her legs around his waist, trying to pull him inside of her, but he didn’t move any further.

“Your name, angel,” Ren whispered, keeping his eyes on hers. “Give it to me.”

Rey swallowed, her mouth trembling under his intense gaze. Then she gave in.

“Rey.”

He rewarded her immediately, pushing himself forward until he was fully sheathed inside of her. She cried out at the feeling, her legs holding him tighter. He felt so impossibly good as he started thrusting in and out of her.

“Rey…” Ren moaned against her cheek. “Rey…Rey…”

She lifted her hips to meet him, thrust for thrust. Her hands were clawing at his back, and she idly wondered if she was leaving marks on him, and part of her found a thrill at idea. His lips went to her neck, and he started leaving marks of his own, sucking and biting at her skin.

“Say my name, Rey,” he groaned into her neck.

“Ren…” Rey got out. “ _Fuck_ , Ren…”

His thrusts were starting to come faster as he came undone, her words having an effect on him. She felt his hand slip between them; those long fingers rubbed quick circles around her sex, bringing her right to the edge.

“Wanted you…since I first saw you,” he groaned as he stroked her.

“God, _Ren_.” Her words were barely audible now.

“You wanna come, Rey?” She could hear the grin in his voice, but she was too close to the edge to care.

She nodded against him, unable to find the words.

His thrusts became even more erratic and he was flicking his thumb against her clit, the sensations were becoming too much for her.

“Look at me, Rey,” Ren groaned. “I want you to look at me when you come.”

Rey locked her eyes with his. His dark eyes were intense on her face.

“Come,” he said.

The look in his eyes and the command in his voice was enough to bring her release. Ren watched her as she rode out her orgasm. He continued to thrust into her three more times before he found his own release, spilling himself inside her walls. Then he collapsed on top of her, his face buried in her neck.

They were both breathing heavily, and Rey absently started stroking his hair. She supposed she should be swimming in regret, but she was having a hard time feeling anything other than satisfaction. This hadn't exactly been what she came to Las Vegas for, but she would certainly call it a win.

“So,” she said. “What now?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, here is the desired smut. Hope you enjoyed it!


	7. Questions

“Have you given up any information to anyone outside of this agency?”

“No,” Rey said. “I haven’t.”

Luke looked her over. She was sitting in the chair in front of his desk, waiting for him to ask her something else. He had been questioning people all morning. Any new agent they had was required to see him for this. She could tell he wasn’t enjoying it. Luke was trusting, and he hated making his agents think he was suspicious of them.

“Have you come into contact with any member of the K.O.R.?” Luke asked. He was well aware that she had, but he was reading the questions off a list.

“Yes,” Rey said. She tried to keep herself from blushing as she remembered the last time she “came into contact” with a K.O.R. agent just a few days ago. “On two of my missions.”

“Right, I know about that,” Luke said. “You don’t need to explain again.”

Rey let out a breath. She hated lying to him. It was worse when she had to do it repeatedly.

“And you’ve never voluntarily given up information about the J.C. to a member of the K.O.R.?” From his tone, it sounded like this was the last question.

“No,” Rey said. “I haven’t.” This wasn’t a lie. Ren had found her on missions, but she didn’t know how he had done it. She had certainly never given him any information on where she would be.

“Alright,” Luke said, setting down his pen. “That’s it.”

“Do you really think you’re going to find a mole by asking these questions?” Rey asked. She had been wondering this for a while. “Whoever it is could be lying.”

Luke scanned her face. “Rey, if there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s spotting a liar.”

Rey swallowed. She’d keep that in mind. “Do you agree with your sister? Do you think we have a mole?”

Luke shook his head. “I don’t. I’m only doing this for Leia’s sake.”

“But if we don’t have a mole, then how has the K.O.R. shown up on two of our missions?” This was something she had been wondering herself. How _exactly_ did Ren know where she was going to be? Finn was her source, but what was his?

“I don’t know,” he said. “But I know none of us are responsible.”

Rey nodded. She agreed with him. It was hard to imagine anyone Luke and Leia handpicked to join them being a mole. Luke and Leia took everyone in like family, and they were always very thorough in their investigations into each potential agent. “I think you’re right,” she said.

“You’re not going to be going on any missions for a little while, Rey,” Luke said suddenly.

Rey’s eyebrows shot up. “ _What_?”

Luke sighed. “Believe me, I had no say in this. It was my sister’s call.”

“But _why_?” Rey asked, incredulous. Then a thought struck her. “She…she doesn’t think I’m—?”

“No, no, no,” Luke said immediately, waving his hand in the air as if to banish the idea. “She doesn’t think you’re the mole. She’s doing this because the only time the K.O.R. has shown up on missions, they’ve been yours. So she wants to see if it would happen with anyone else, or if they’ve somehow targeted you.”

“Targeted me?” Rey asked. “What do you mean?”

Luke shrugged. “Maybe they’ve found some way to track you specifically. No matter what is going on, she wants you to lay low for a while. No missions.”

Rey sighed. The missions were the reason she joined this agency in the first place. She didn’t like the idea of stopping, but it wasn’t like she had a choice.

“Okay,” she said. “No missions.”

“Thank you for not fighting me on this,” Luke said. “You know I wouldn’t do this if I had any other choice.”

“I know,” Rey said. She stood up from her chair. “Will that be all?”

Luke nodded. “Yes. Send in the next agent when you go out.”

Rey left Luke’s office, and sent in the waiting agent, Jessika, as she went. She headed to her own office. Apparently she was about to have a lot of free time. A blessing and a curse, she supposed.

When she sat down at her desk, her phone rang. She pulled it out of her pocket and saw that the caller ID only read “unknown.” She frowned at it, but pressed answer.

“Hello?” she answered.

“What are you doing?” Ren’s voice came from the other line.

Rey gave a small gasp and immediately glanced up at her still open door. No one was there. She got up and moved towards the door so she could close it. She had almost forgotten that she had given Ren her phone number, a stupid decision on her part, but he had taken advantage of her post coital state.

“Ren,” Rey said under he breath when she closed the door to the office. “You can’t just _call_ me.”

“Why not?” he asked. She could hear the amusement in his voice. “Wasn’t that the point of you giving me your number?”

“I’m at work,” she hissed at him, irritation apparent in her voice.

“Take a break,” he said.

Rey huffed but stayed on the phone. As much as she wanted to be annoyed with him, she couldn’t help but be happy to hear his voice. He was, for once, a welcome distraction. She sat back down at her desk.

“What do you want?” Rey asked.

“I want to see you,” he said.

Rey couldn’t help but smile at that. Clearly they weren’t done. He just kept coming back for more.

“How sweet.” She chuckled. “Do you want to take me on a date? I hope you bring me somewhere nicer than the backseat of my car this time.”

“I don’t remember hearing you complain,” he said.

She certainly hadn’t. He could have taken her against the brick wall and she still would have loved every moment. It’s not like she was very experienced when it came to men, but Ren was by far the best she’d ever had. Not that she’d ever let him know that.

“Maybe not,” she said. “But I’d prefer a change of scenery.”

“My Rey,” he said and she could hear the smirk in his voice. “I’ll be wherever you want me to be.”

Rey licked her lips and thought about it. She was past caring about whether or not it was a bad idea to keep seeing him. After all, what they were talking about had nothing to do with work. She was already contemplating where she wanted to meet with him.

“New York City,” she said.

“A big city girl, huh?” he asked.

“Not at all.” She was brought up in the furthest thing from a big city. But she her short visits to New York on missions had been more fun for her than any other traveling experience.

“Well, New York is a pretty big place,” he said. “Are you going to give me some details or am I expected to find you in a city of eight million?”

“I’ll text you more details,” she said. It wasn’t like she could give him a time and location off the top of her head. She needed to think on it.

“When?” he asked.

Rey bit her lip and thought about it. She wasn’t needed on missions anymore, so her absence would not seem suspicious, and she really wanted to see him again. “Tomorrow.”

“Alright.” She heard the smile in his voice. “Tomorrow.”

“I’ll see you then.’ She hung up the phone.

*****

A hotel. It’s not like she was trying to be subtle. What was the point of that? She knew what she wanted, and it was obvious what he wanted. So instead of telling him to meet her at some restaurant or park, she opted for a hotel. After all, their first time had been in the backseat of her car. While she had enjoyed that, she’d prefer the comfort of a bed.

It was the early evening and she was laying on the hotel bed, flipping through the channels on TV. She’d texted Ren the time and room number of the hotel the day before, but she had shown up early, too nervous to stay away. While she wanted to see Ren again, something about seeing him always made her skin tingle and her heart rate pick up. She didn’t know if she liked it or hated it.

She heard the key in the door. She straightened up against the pillows and turned the TV off. The door opened and Ren was there, dressed casually like the last time she had seen him, in jeans and a t-shirt. His eyes met hers immediately and he took her in as he stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. For a moment, he just stood there, looking at her.

Rey spoke first. “I’m glad you came.”

Ren raised his eyebrows and took a step closer to the bed. “Did you think I wouldn’t?”

Rey swallowed. “I…” she started, then cleared her throat. “I wondered if after last time…you’d got what you wanted and wouldn’t want to see me again.” This had been on her mind until he had called her, but even after that, she still had the same worries.

He flinched, and looked startled by her words. “Is that really what you think of me?”

“No!” Rey moved off the bed and went to stand in front of him. “That’s not what I think of you. It’s just…I wondered.”

“Stop wondering.” His hands went to her hips and he pulled her against his own. “I’m here, aren’t I?”

Rey nodded, craning her neck to keep eye contact with him. “I’m glad you’re here.”

His hands moved down to her legs. She had opted to wear a dress despite only wearing them on rare occasions. It was nothing extravagant, just a simple sundress. He was playing with the hem, his fingers brushing against her bare legs.

Rey pushed herself up on her toes and pressed her mouth against his. She kissed him hungrily, opening his mouth with her tongue and wrapping her arms around his shoulders. He didn’t hesitate to kiss back, his hands holding her close. Her tongue was exploring his mouth and she heard him moan against her lips. She smiled, loving that she could draw such reactions from him. His hands moved to her thighs, and Rey jumped up to wrap her legs around his waist. He walked them towards the bed. She loved it when he carried her. His strength was exciting.

When he reached the bed he set her down on the edge. He was still standing and Rey’s hands immediately went to his belt. She was already so impatient.

Ren surprised her when he caught her wrists in his hands and pushed them back to her sides. She looked up at him questioningly and he smirked at her.

“I’m going to take my time with you tonight,” he said lowly.

His voice and the implications of his words sent a shiver down Rey’s spine as she stared at him, waiting for his next move. He leaned down to kiss her again and he pushed at her shoulder. She took her cue from him and moved back on the bed so her head was against the pillows.

Ren kicked off his shoes and crawled up the bed until he was hovering over her. He leaned down to kiss her again and Rey ran her fingers through his hair. His mouth moved to her neck, then her chest, as he made his way down, kissing her skin and kissing her through her dress. His hands followed his mouth, cupping her breasts through the fabric. She reached for the hem of the dress, intending to pull if off, but his hands, once again, stopped her.

“Patience, angel,” he said and kissed her wrist.

Rey huffed and placed her hands back at her sides.

Ren continued to move lower down her body, kissing her through the dress as he went. When he reached her waist, Rey opened her legs in invitation and he settled between them. He pushed her dress up her legs, placing gentle kisses on her inner thigh as he went. Rey moaned at the feeling. He was moving closer and closer to that spot that was _aching_ for him. When he reached her underwear, he glanced up at her before putting his mouth against her sex. Rey almost shot off the bed. The fabric of her underwear between her and his mouth hindered the feeling. She was already wet for him, and she knew he could feel it. He hiked the dress up around her stomach and his hands went to the waistband of her underwear. Rey lifted her hips eagerly and Ren pulled them off over her legs.

When he was settled between her legs again, his mouth went to her sex, no fabric separating them this time. Rey gasped at the feeling, her hand burying itself in his hair, trying to pull him closer. His strong arms slipped around her thighs, holding her still as he began lapping away at her clit. Rey’s head fell back against the pillows and she moaned louder. She felt his tongue dart between her slick folds and she almost hissed in reaction.

“God, you taste so good, Rey,” he said against her clit.

Rey could only moan in response.

He pushed his thumb inside of her and wriggled it while he sucked her clit. If he hadn’t been holding her in place, Rey’s hips would have tilted towards his face. She pulled at his roots, encouraging him to keep going.

“Ren…” she moaned out. “God, _fuck_ , Ren.”

His hand moved up to her breasts in response, cupping her through her dress. She placed her small hand on his, following his movements while his tongue continued to tease and torment her. She closed her eyes, losing herself in the feeling. Her whole body was humming with energy; her heart racing like it always did when she was with him. He sucked her clit and fingered her until she felt a familiar feeling coursing through her body.

“Ren, _Ren_ , I’m gonna come,” she got out.

He kept at it, sucking and fingering her until she came with a sharp groan, her back arching off the bed. Ren guided her down from her orgasm, placing soft kisses on her thighs. Her chest was heaving with exertion as Ren moved back up her body and stared down at her. His shirt was off now. She wasn’t sure when that had happened, but she appreciated the view. He looked as satisfied as she felt, but there was still a hunger in his eyes. She put her hands around his neck again and brought his face down so she could kiss him. He responded to the kiss with surprising gentleness.

His hands moved to her dress, still around her stomach, and he began pulling it off of her. She raised her arms above her head and let him remove it. Then his eyes turned to her bra. He kissed her breasts through the fabric again before moving his hands around her back to unhook it. He tossed it to the side when it was off and he placed his mouth on her chest, kissing and kneading her breasts.

Impatient, Rey wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him closer. He looked up at her face.

“Are you ready for me?” he asked softly.

Rey nodded.

He made quick work of his pants, pulling them off and tossing them to the floor along with his underwear. Then he settled himself between her legs again and lined himself up with her entrance. Slowly, he pushed himself inside of her until she was filled to the hilt. Rey heard herself gasp. Though he had been inside of her before, his size was still a shock to her system. He waited a moment, allowing her to adjust, before he started to move.

He pulled out of her before thrusting back in, and Rey tilted her hips encouragingly. His breath was hot against her lips and his eyes never left hers. Rey buried her hands in her hair and tugged with his every thrust. His pace was quickening, and Rey was having a hard time keeping up. Her moans were becoming louder and her legs tightened around his waist.

“Are you gonna come for me again, Rey?” Ren groaned out, placing kisses along her jaw.

“ _Yes_ ,” Rey moaned. “ _Harder_.”

He needed no further encouragement. His hand moved to her waist as he pounded into her so hard there was no question the person next door would know exactly what they were doing. She felt herself tipping over the edge and closed her eyes, but he slammed into her almost painfully at that.

“Don’t do that,” he panted. “Wanna see you. Wanna watch you come.”

She opened her eyes again and he was staring down at her. His eyes were so dark, and she lost herself in them as she came. His name flew from her lips as she succumbed to her orgasm. He watched her the whole time, but he didn’t let up on his thrusts. Her over-sensitive flesh protested, but he continued to pound into her tightness until his own orgasm came over him. He groaned out a word that sounded suspiciously like her name. He collapsed on top of her, though he held himself up just enough so that his weight wouldn’t crush her.

Rey was still breathing heavily as she felt him begin to soften inside of her. If it was possible, this time had been even better than the first time. She hadn’t expected that.

His face was buried in her neck and she began placing kisses on the side of his face. He was breathing hard too, spent from their liaisons.

Finally, he pulled himself out of her and lay down next to her on his back. Rey turned her head to the side to look at him. He seemed tired.

“I’m glad we had a bed this time,” she said, a smile creeping on her lips.

He chuckled. “Certainly makes the aftermath a lot easier.”

She nodded and recalled the difficulties of car sex. After they had finished, it had been a struggle to get dressed, and neither of them had had much room.

“You like it when I look at you,” Rey observed, her hand trailing up and down his arm.

He turned to face her, his eyebrows drawn together.

Rey remembered their first time, how he had asked her to look at him as she came. He had done the same thing again their second time.

“Is that a power trip or something?” she asked playfully.

Ren gave her a small smile. “No, it’s not that,” he said.

She stared at him, waiting for him to elaborate further. He didn’t.

“Why’d you pick New York?” he asked suddenly.

Rey bit her lip and thought about her answer. “I’ve been here a few times,” she said. “I’ve always liked it.”

“But you’re not a city girl,” he said, remembering what she had said to him on the phone.

Rey shook her head. “I’m not.”

“Small town girl?” he asked.

She looked away, turning to stare up at the ceiling. “It’s complicated.”

“Well, how’d you wind up with the J.C.?” he asked.

Rey scrunched her nose. “I don’t believe I ever said anything about working with the J.C.,” she said. She wasn’t enjoying this conversation. It was far too personal for her liking. She turned to look at him again. “What about you?” she asked. “How’d you wind up working for the K.O.R.?”

Ren’s eyes darkened and his jaw clenched. “We’re not talking about that.”

Rey raised her eyebrows, not backing down. “What about your family? Where are they?”

He turned away from her then. “We are certainly not talking about _that_.”

“So no personal topics for either of us then,” Rey said. He had asked her personal questions first. He had no right to be mad about her doing the same.

“I guess not,” he said, still not looking at her.

“I do have another question for you though,” she said.

Ren sighed. He sounded frustrated.

“It’s not a personal question,” she said hurriedly.

He took another deep breath before turning back around to face her. He scanned her face. “What is it?”

“How did you find me on my missions?” she asked. This had been on her mind for a long time, and now that Luke was looking into it, she wanted to know even more.

Ren raised an eyebrow at her. “How did _you_ find _me_?” he shot back.

“I have a source,” she said. “A person who gave me information. That’s all I’ll tell you.” No way in hell was she going to give Finn’s name.

Ren licked his lips and just looked at her.

“Is it the same for you?” she asked. “Do you have a source? Someone who knows my agency?”

“Just say the J.C.,” he huffed. “I’m tired of tip toeing around this. I work for the K.O.R. You work for the J.C. I already know you do. I’ve been able to confirm it.”

Rey clenched her jaw. It wasn’t surprising that he confirmed her agency, but that didn’t mean she liked it. “Fine,” she said. “You’re right. Now tell me your source.”

“Why the sudden interest?” he asked.

Rey bit her lip. “People have been getting suspicious,” she said. “They think we have a mole because two of my missions have been interrupted by the K.O.R.”

Ren looked surprised. “Are they questioning people?”

“Yes,” she said. “Even me. Maybe you won’t tell me how you found me, but at least tell me if it was someone on the inside. Do you have a mole inside the J.C.?”

Ren shook his head. “I don’t, and I promise I would tell you if I did.”

Rey let out a breath. It was a relief that no one in her agency was a traitor.

“Now,” Ren said. “Can we be done with work talk?”

Rey chuckled. “You don’t want to talk about work, and neither of us want to talk about our lives, so what does that leave?”

Ren smirked at her and she felt his hand on her hip. “I can think of a few things.”

She smiled and he came close to kiss her. She didn’t pull away. Nothing compared to the feeling of his lips on hers. They were breaking a million rules by doing this, but one thing was for certain.

This was the best mistake she’d ever made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, so many problems, and neither of them want to talk about it. What a shame. I hope you're enjoying!


	8. Friday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the wait. But here's a new chapter!

There was nothing more boring than channel surfing. It was Friday night and Rey was in her apartment. Fridays were usually busy for her. Targets were often out on the town for her to take them out. But now that she was on a forced vacation from missions, she was alone in her apartment on a Friday night with nothing to do. Finn had offered to come over with take out food when he noticed her frustration over not having a mission, but she had declined. She knew he had work of his own to do and was only offering because he felt bad. Luke clearly felt guilty over keeping her from missions. He had brought her lunch the last few days as if to tell her he was sorry. She wasn’t angry at him. It’s not like it was his call. So no missions left her alone in her apartment looking for something to watch on TV.

Rey did have to appreciate the J.C. for the apartment she lived in. It wasn’t luxurious, but she preferred that. She hadn’t grown up in lavish conditions, but this was still far superior to anything she had lived in before. She had a balcony with a great view of the city, a master bedroom with a master bath, and plenty of room in the kitchen and living room. It was above and beyond what she ever would have expected to have. The J.C. really took care of their people.

She stopped flipping through channels when she came across an in progress sex scene. She didn’t recognize the movie, but the man was big and dark haired and she couldn’t keep her mind from drifting to Ren. It had been a week since their rendezvous in New York. She hadn’t seen him since the morning she left. They had texted back and forth for the last few days, but she was already starting to miss him, and she hated herself for it. This was becoming a problem. They were having some sort of affair and if either of their agencies found out, she didn’t even want to think of what they’d do. The worst part of it was this excited her all the more. She wasn’t supposed to be with him. He was off limits, but that only made her want him more. She knew he had the same feelings.

As the sex scene went on, Rey found her hand reaching into her shorts so she could touch herself. She tried to imagine herself and Ren in the place of the movie couple. Ren’s strong body hovering over her, his mouth between her legs, her hands buried in his hair. She started rubbing herself but was having a hard time getting wet. Frustrated, she huffed and her fingers stayed on course. She blamed Ren for this. Ever since she had been with him that first night in the car, she had a hard time getting herself off. He was so good at what he did, and her hands seemed feeble by comparison. She pulled her hand out of her shorts and glanced over at the kitchen counter where her phone was sitting. Before she had a chance to think about it, she got up from the couch and got her phone from the counter. She found Ren’s number in her contacts and hit ‘dial.’

It was too late to turn back now. Her phone was to her ear and it was ringing. It rang three times before she got an answer.

“Yeah?” Ren’s voice came from the other end.

“Hey,” Rey said, her voice sounded nervous in her own ears. He didn’t sound like he knew it was her when he answered. “It’s me.”

“Oh, hey,” he said, his voice a bit lighter. “Sorry, I didn’t look at the caller I.D.”

“It’s fine,” she said and bit the inside of her cheek. “What are you doing?”

“On a stakeout,” he answered.

“Oh, you’re busy. I can call back later—”

“No, no,” he said quickly. “You’re saving me from a whole lot of boredom. This guy isn’t supposed to leave the building for at least an hour.”

“Who are you staking out?” Rey asked, a smile apparent in her voice.

Ren chuckled. “Not on your life, angel.”

Rey returned his chuckle.

“What are you up to?” he asked.

She sighed. “Nothing. I’m at home.”

“No missions?” he sounded surprised.

Rey bit her lip. “Well, I didn’t tell you this, but I’m being kept off missions for now. They didn’t want me interrupted by a K.O.R. agent again.”

Ren didn’t say anything for a moment. “Oh.” He sounded guilty. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” she said. “This happened because of me too.”

“I’d hate being kept off of missions,” he said.

“Believe me, it’s not fun,” she agreed.

He sighed but didn’t say anything. Rey bit her lip, thinking back to why she had called him in the first place.

“So…” she started. “What are you wearing?”

Ren said nothing for a moment before she heard him bark out a laugh. Rey couldn’t keep the blush from creeping over her face.

“Are you kidding?” he asked.

“Um, no?” she said awkwardly.

“I’m sorry, Rey. I don’t mean to laugh.” There was still a chuckle in his voice. “But hearing you ask that in such a sweet voice was downright adorable.”

“Gee, thanks,” she said, her face getting redder. “Adorable is really what I was going for. I’m hanging up now.”

“Rey, don’t!” The laughter in his voice was gone. “I’m sorry. I’m a dickhead. A jackass. A total shitface.”

“You are right about all of those things,” she said, feeling a little better.

“I’m being serious now. All jokes are done,” he said. “Is that what you called me for, Rey?”

Rey swallowed. “Well…yeah. I’ve been having a little trouble with…you know…”

“Making yourself come?”

Her blush was back. “To put it simply, yeah.”

“If you want to do this, Rey, you can’t exactly be shy about saying that stuff,” he said.

“Fine,” she said. “I’ll try.”

“Good. Are you in bed right now?” he asked.

“No.” She was still standing at her kitchen counter.

“Go get into bed,” he told her.

Rey was feeling nervous as she walked towards her bedroom. She had never done this before. She wasn’t even sure what she was supposed to say to him. She dimmed the lights of her room before she crawled into bed, laying her head against the pillows.

“I’m in bed,” she said into the phone.

“You should probably put me on speaker so you can use both your hands,” he said.

Rey blushed at the implications of his words but did as he suggested and put him on speaker, then placed the phone next to her face on the pillow.

“You’re on speaker.”

“Take your clothes off,” he said. His voice seemed to have dropped lower.

Rey’s breath hitched and she reached for the bottom of her shirt, lifting it over her head. She reached around her back and unhooked her bra, tossing it to the side along with her shirt. She pulled her shorts off with her underwear and threw them to the floor. Now she was completely bare.

“They’re off,” she told him.

“Rey, what were you doing before you called me?” he asked her.

Rey blushed again at the memory. This wasn’t exactly something she wanted to tell him. “I was touching myself.”

“What were you thinking about while you touched yourself?” he asked.

“You,” she admitted. “I was thinking about you.”

“But you couldn’t make yourself come?”

“No,” Rey said. Talking about this with him was strangely arousing. The honesty of it was already making her wetter than she had been when she was touching herself earlier. “What I do isn’t enough.”

“You’re saying you need me to come? That’s why you called me?”

“Yes,” she admitted.

“Touch yourself, Rey,” he said. “Touch yourself and tell me what you’re doing.”

Rey’s hand trailed down her stomach, her other hand reached up and cupped her breasts. Her hand found her sex and she traced circles around it, already feeling her wetness. His words had been enough to get her wet. She slipped a finger inside of herself and heard herself moan.

“I’m already wet, Ren,” she got out.

“Are you wet for me, Rey?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said. “I’m using my fingers, but I have to pretend it’s you.”

She heard him groan himself. “Trust me, angel. I’d much rather be there right now.”

“Talk to me, Ren,” she said, her fingers rubbing against her clit. “Tell me what you’d do if you were here.”

“Oh, Rey, we wouldn’t leave your bed for hours,” he said. “I’d take my time between your legs, tasting you and fucking you with my tongue. I’d make you come over and over until you couldn’t walk. Then I’d turn over on my back you could ride me. You’d look so good riding me, Rey.”

Rey moaned loudly at the thought of him between her thighs as she rode him hard and he thrust up into her. They hadn’t done that yet, but now that the thought was in her mind, she couldn’t wait to be on top of him. She added a second finger and thrust inside of herself even more quickly.

“ _Shit_ , Ren, I need you,” she got out. “I miss your cock so bad…”

“Remember our first time? When I fucked you in the backseat of your car?” Ren asked, trying to stir her on. “I almost fucked you against my bike I was so impatient. It felt so good when I was finally inside of you. You’re the best I’ve ever had, Rey.”

That did a lot to arouse her and boost her ego. Ren was by far the best lay she had ever experienced. It felt good to know he felt that way in return. She felt herself finally approaching her orgasm.

“I’m close,” she moaned out. “You make me so wet, Ren, better than anyone else I’ve ever had…” She figured she could return his compliment. “I’m rubbing my clit, pretending it’s you who’s touching me.” Her moans were growing louder.

“You won’t have to pretend for long,” he said. “Next time I get my hands on you, this won’t even compare.”

Rey rubbed harder at his words, her breathing was growing ragged. “Ren…I’m—I’m gonna—”

“I’m a thousand miles away and you're still gonna come for me,” Ren said.

Her orgasm came over her. She moaned his name as she came. She pulled her hand away and wiped the wetness from herself on the bed. Her breathing was still uneven.

She wasn’t sure what she was supposed to say. “Thank you,” was all she could think of.

“You’re welcome.” His voice returned to its conversational tone.

“You’re good at that,” she told him. “You seem so comfortable.”

“I’m surprised you’re not the same way,” he said. “Given what we do for a living.”

Rey swallowed. “But that’s work. It’s different when it’s my own life.”

“I get it,” he said. “If you ever need help again, just call. Even if you’re at work.” There was a teasing tone to his voice.

“Very funny. I doubt I’ll be calling from the office.”

“You never know,” he said. “When can I see you again?”

“Why don’t you tell me when you’re available?” she asked. He should be the one to decide this time.

“What about Sunday?” he asked.

“On God’s day?” Rey laughed. “I’m offended. What kind of lady do you think I am?”

“The kind that calls me up for phone sex on a Friday night.” He chuckled.

“Very true,” she said. “Maybe Sunday will work for me. Where do you want to meet?”

“I’m feeling beachy,” Ren said. “What are your thoughts on Florida?”

“It’s hot and expensive,” Rey answered.

“True, but I’ve enjoyed my few trips there. What do you think?”

“Where in Florida?” she asked.

“Cocoa Beach?”

Rey thought on it. She did have to be at work on Monday, so she couldn’t spend the night there. That would change things. “How about I meet you there in the morning? I won’t be able to stay the night.”

“We can do that,” he said. “I’ll text you the details this time.”

“Okay,” she agreed. “Until Sunday, then.”

“Until Sunday.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, some good old fashioned phone sex. Somehow I get the feeling these two crazy kids are getting in too deep. Until next time!


	9. Truth

Rey thought she had the wrong address when she came to a stop in front of a diner near the pier in Cocoa Beach. Ren had only texted her an address and a time, and she had shown up, a few minutes late, perhaps, but at the right address. She’d figured it would be the address of a hotel, but here she was, standing in front of a small, coastal diner.

Not knowing what else to do, she stepped inside. The diner wasn’t too crowded, it being a Sunday and all, so it didn’t take her long to spot Ren. He looked positively out of place in his leather jacket and boots in the small, Southern diner. His arm was draped over the booth he was sitting in, and he hadn’t seemed to notice her yet.

“May I help you, miss?” the hostess said to her, smiling cheerfully.

Rey returned her smile. “I’m meeting a friend,” she said, and gestured in Ren’s direction.

The hostess nodded. “Go on in.”

As Rey was making her way to the booth, Ren turned and noticed her for the first time. His eyes lit up and a smile tugged at his lips.

“Not exactly what I expected,” Rey said in greeting as she slid into the booth across from him.

Ren chuckled. “You said you wanted to meet in the morning. I figured breakfast would be appropriate.”

“You can just admit you wanted to take me on a date,” Rey teased. “It’s okay. I find it adorable.”

Ren shrugged. “If that’s how you want to see it, angel.”

Rey looked down at the table, finding nothing there but two glasses of water for her and Ren. “I need a menu,” she said, confused.

“I already ordered for you,” Ren said.

Rey raised her eyebrows at him. “Control freak,” she said.

“Not at all.” Ren smirked at her. “I just didn’t want to spend too much time here. We’ve got places to be.”

“Places? Plural?” Rey asked.

“Okay, maybe one place in particular.” Ren chuckled.

Rey leaned back in her booth. “What did you order for me? I’m gonna be mad if it’s something I hate.”

“I played it safe,” he said. “Pancakes and hash browns. I was going to get you bacon, but I didn’t know if you were a vegetarian.”

“What makes you think I’d be a vegetarian?” Rey couldn’t imagine not eating meat. She’d eat just about anything.

“This may have escaped your notice, but we’ve never actually eaten anything together,” Ren pointed out. “We’ve had drinks together, but I’ve never seen you eat any food. So I had no way of knowing what you eat.”

That was true. They’d never had a meal together before, but now they were about to eat breakfast together. That made her feel oddly uneasy. It was like their relationship was progressing somehow, and she didn’t know how she felt about that.

“For future reference, I’m not a vegetarian,” she told him. “But I do like pancakes, so you lucked out on this one.”

“And the hash browns?” Ren asked.

“I could take them or leave them,” she said. “I would have preferred bacon.”

“Well, now I know,” he said.

“Are we getting to know each other?” she wondered out loud.

“I sure hope not,” he said. He seemed to be joking, but there was an edge of seriousness in his voice.

“How did it go on Friday?” she asked, changing the subject.

Ren shrugged. “Fine. I was just meant to follow him, watch his routine, and report back. Pretty dull.”

“What were they doing putting you on an assignment like that?” Rey was confused. Ren was supposedly the best agent the Knights of Ren had. Something like a stake out seemed well below his pay grade.

“Let’s just say the person I was following wasn’t exactly someone they wanted a lower agent to tangle with,” Ren answered.

“I suppose you’re still not going to tell me who it is,” she said. Her curiosity had been piqued.

He smirked at her. “Nope,” he said simply.

Rey huffed and was about to say something else about the matter before a waitress showed up at their table with plates in her hands. She set down Rey’s plate of pancakes in front of her, then a smaller plate of hash browns next to it. Ren had also ordered pancakes, but a smaller plate with bacon on it was placed next to his plate. They both thanked the waitress and she walked away.

Before Rey could say anything, Ren reached over and took her hash brown plate, replacing it with his plate of bacon.

“There,” he said. “Problem solved.”

Rey chuckled. “Who said chivalry is dead?” She started digging into her food. The pancakes were delicious. She absently wondered if Ren had been here before and enjoyed it enough to come back.

Her first pancake was almost gone by the time Ren spoke again. “Do you always eat that fast or were you just really hungry?”

Rey looked up at him. He had only just taken a few bites of his hash browns, and was looking at her with his eyebrows raised. “I eat fast,” she said. “It’s…a habit.”

“Care to elaborate?” he asked.

“No,” she said, because she really didn’t want to talk about that.

They ate in silence for a few minutes. Rey tried to eat slower. What he had said embarrassed her. She didn’t try to eat like a pig. It was just how she ate.

“I’m sorry I asked you that,” Ren said, breaking the silence. “It was rude.”

Rey looked at him. He seemed genuine. “It’s fine.”

He nodded and bit the inside of his cheek. Most of the food on his plate was gone.

The waitress came by again to drop the check on their table.

“How’s the whole ‘no missions’ thing going?” he asked when the waitress walked away.

Rey sighed. “Honestly? It’s awful. It’s only been going on a little over a week and I’m already sick of it.”

“Do you know how long they’re going to keep you off of them?” he asked.

She shook her head. “No. Maybe when their suspicions die down about the K.O.R. Right now, they’re still being really cautious.”

“Are they still questioning people?”

“I don’t think so,” she said. “But I can’t be sure they aren’t taking other precautions.”

“So you think you’ll be off missions for what? A month?” he asked.

“I hope it won’t be that long,” she said. She was finishing the last bite of her food. “I know they want me back on missions as soon as possible.”

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing that I’m not bombarding any J.C. missions anymore,” he said.

“Yeah, that is a good thing.”

Ren picked up the check from the table and looked at it. Then he fished a twenty-dollar bill out of his pocket and put it on the table.

“Ready to go?” he asked, standing up from the table.

Rey smirked. “Aw, you even paid for the meal. This is a date.”

“Ha ha,” Ren said. “Let’s just go.”

Rey got up from the booth and walked out of the diner with him. A rush of warm air greeted them as they stepped out the door.

“This way,” Ren said, pointing down the boardwalk.

She followed him, matching his stride. The beach was to their left, and Rey couldn’t help but admire the blue of the ocean.

“So why haven’t you had to take any heat from my interfering on your missions?” she asked him as they walked.

“What makes you think I haven’t?” he shot back.

“Maybe it’s because I’m the one banned from missions while you’re still working.”

“I’ve shown up on exactly three of your missions, plus the time we came across each other at the senator’s home, but as I told you, that was not planned. Did you tell your superiors about all of these occasions?” he asked.

Rey bit the inside of her cheek. “No,” she said. “I only told them about two.” The time Ren had shown up in the bar after she had completed her mission, that she hadn’t told Luke. It hadn’t been necessary. Nothing happened that warranted reporting, unlike the other two missions where Ren prevented her from carrying out her task.

“You’ve shown up on two of my missions, again plus the time at the senator’s home,” he recalled. “The only time I reported this was after my mission at the senator’s home, and that’s because you stole from me then.”

“So what’s your point?” Rey asked. She didn’t see what he was getting at.

“Well, I’ve screwed up your missions twice so you would have to report that to your superiors, whereas it’s only happened once for me. Once usually isn’t a problem, but when something like that happens twice, people tend to get nervous.”

“So what you’re saying is I should screw up another one of your missions?” Rey joked.

“I’d prefer you didn’t,” he said. “I took a lot of shit after the last time, believe me.”

“You did?” Rey asked, surprised.

“Are you kidding?” he said. “You felt me up and pick pocketed me. Maybe you didn’t realize how embarrassing that would be to report to my superiors, and word sure as hell got around the office about that incident.”

“Sorry to bruise the great male ego,” Rey said, feeling smug.

“I’ve gotten some of my pride back since then.” Ren smirked at her.

Rey blushed at the implication.

“We’re here,” Ren said suddenly, gesturing to the building next to them.

“A motel? Really, Ren?” Rey asked when she realized where they were. “You really are a romantic, aren’t you?”

Ren shrugged apologetically. “I needed somewhere close by, and this was it.”

To be true, Rey didn’t really care where they stayed. She had been dying to get here hands on him since their phone call on Friday night. She’d take him on the beach if she had to.

Ren had already come by to get a room and key card. He slid the card into one of the first doors and opened the door for her. She moved passed him and into the room. It was small, and looked like every Florida hotel with the floral wallpaper and the beach paintings.

Once the door shut behind them Rey felt Ren’s hands wrap around her waist and his lips came down on her neck. She buried her hand in his hair as he started suckling and biting her skin. Apparently he had been just as eager as she was. She turned in his arms and stood on her toes so she could kiss him on the mouth. He kissed back without hesitation, accepting her tongue into his mouth. She moaned against him and ran her hands up and down his chest, loving the hardness of his body.

“I want your mouth on me,” she said against his lips

Ren nodded and tugged at the hem of her shirt, yanking it off over her head. She went to work on taking off her shorts as he pulled off his own shirt. When she was only in her underwear, he pushed her back towards the bed and she lay down, waiting for his next move. His hands went to the waistline of her underwear and he pulled them down over her legs. After tossing them to the floor, he kissed her knee first, slowly making he way up to her hot center.

Rey gasped when his lips were finally on her sex. Ren could be insufferable, but damn if he wasn’t good with his mouth. He knew just what to do to get her wet and panting. He grips her hips with his large hands, holding her in place as he licks and sucks her. His tongue teases her clit as he nudges two fingers inside of her. She moaned at the feeling and her legs trembled. Ren stayed on course, his fingers thrusting in and out of her as her hips rose to try and bring his mouth closer to her. It didn’t take long before she was approaching that familiar feeling again. Her whole body clenched. She could feel her oncoming orgasm.

But Ren felt it too, and after one last, long lick, he removed his fingers from her sex and pulled himself away from her. Rey cried out, confused and unsatisfied. He was still kneeling between her legs, looking up at her with that damned smirk plastered on his face. He moved up her body and his largeness enveloped her. He settled himself between her legs and rocked his hips into her teasingly, the fabric of his pants hindering any real pleasure. He leaned down to kiss her again. She could taste herself on his lips.

“You’re not going to let me get away with that, are you?” Ren asked against her mouth. He thrust his hips against hers again, as if to accentuate his point.

Rey suddenly remembered what he said to her on the phone the other night. With that in mind, she pushed at Ren’s shoulder until he was tumbling onto his back and she moved over so she was straddling him. He looked up at her, satisfied. She hadn’t taken the initiative in bed with him before, but seeing him underneath her, she couldn’t help but be gratified. Her hands went to work on the belt of his pants. She tugged them down, along with his briefs, and slowly lowered herself onto him until he was fully inside of her. She groaned, and she heard him make his own satisfied noises. It felt different from this angle, in a good way.

Before she had completely adjusted to the size of him, he jerked his hip upwards and she cried out in a mix of pleasure and pain. His hands went to her hips and he grunted out an apology. She looked down at his face and gave him a small nod, letting him know it was okay. His eyes were fixed on her face. Then, finally, she began to move. Her movement was slow, but his head fell back against the pillows and he moaned. Rey felt herself clench around him at the sound, and that only made him moan louder. She lifts her hips up experimentally and allows gravity to force her back down. She moaned herself at the feeling of his cock filling her up again.

Her hands moved to his chest as she started picking up her pace, rolling her hips into him faster. His hands on her hips followed her movements, encouraging her on. Surprising her, he tugged her forward and thrust his hips up at the same time, causing her to cry out at the pleasure of the feeling of his cock moving deeper inside of her.

“ _Fuck_ , Rey,” Ren groaned out.

She didn’t think she’d ever get tired of hearing him say her name like that. She clenched around him again in response and pushed her hands harder against his chest. His hand moved between their bodies, to her clit and he began rubbing her as she rode him. Her moans became louder at the feeling.

“Ren, _fuck_ , I’m close,” she got out.

He rubbed her harder and she keened at the feeling, her orgasm coming over her. His name was on her lips as she came. Ren removed his hand from her clit and placed it back on her hip, now fighting for his own release, thrusting up into her as she rode out her orgasm. His hands continued moving her hips, keeping her moving through her climax. He comes just a few moments later, his hands gripping her hips so tightly she was sure they’d bruise.

Rey was sweating. It had been a while since she had done anything like that with a man. She slowly pulled herself off of him and collapsed on her back next to him. She was breathing heavily, and hoped Ren didn’t want to go again very soon, because she wasn’t sure that would be possible for her.

Suddenly, Rey felt Ren’s arm move around her shoulder and pull her close. Her head rested against his shoulder and she scooted closer to him. They hadn’t really done the post coital cuddling yet, but she was more than willing.

“That was even better than I’d imagined,” Ren said into her hair.

Rey chuckled. “It was good for me too.”

“I knew you’d look good riding me,” he said.

“You’ve imagined that a lot, have you?” she asked.

“Yes,” he said simply.

Rey chuckled again, moving to kiss his chest. They were silent for a moment, just listening to the sound of their own breathing.

“Ren,” Rey said. “Can I ask you something?”

She felt him nod against her. “Yes.”

Rey turned to look up at his face, wanting to make eye contact with him. “What’s your real name?”

Ren’s eyebrows went up in surprise. Rey had wanted to ask him this for weeks now. It was obvious that Kylo Ren wasn’t his real name. He knew her real name. It only seemed fair. She felt herself hold her breath as she waited for him to answer.

“Ben,” he said. “My name is Ben.”

“Ben,” Rey said, trying out the name on her tongue. “I like it.”

“I’ve been waiting for you to ask me that for a while,” Ren said.

“Well, I didn’t know how you’d respond,” she said, scanning his face. “Why didn’t you just tell me yourself?”

Ren glanced away from her. “I haven’t been Ben in a long time.”

“What do you mean?” Rey asked.

Ren sighed. “When I left home, and joined the K.O.R., when I…” he stopped himself. “Let’s just say I’ve had to leave a lot behind.”

Rey had a feeling that was all she was going to get out of him on this topic.

“Rey is your real name, right?” he asked her, looking back at her face.

“It is.” She nodded.

“Where’d your parents get it from?” he asked.

“They didn’t,” she said. “I have no parents. I named myself Rey.” She wasn’t sure what made her reveal so much to him, but he had just shared a part of himself with her, and she supposed she could do the same in return.

He looked surprised. “You’re an orphan?”

She nodded.

“Wow, I’m…sorry,” he said, and he looked like he meant it. “I can’t imagine what that must have been like, growing up with no one.”

“You don’t want to imagine it,” Rey said, turning her face back into his chest. “So I guess we’re both pretty fucked up, huh?”

“Yeah,” he said. “We are.”

They didn’t say anything after that for a long time. They just lay there, wrapped in each other’s arms. Rey had shared a part of herself with this man. She couldn’t remember the last time she had done that with anyone. She would have thought doing that would have made her feel exposed, but it didn’t. She almost felt relieved. And lying there, with Ren’s arms draped around her, for the first time in a long time, she felt at peace.

*****

Walking into work the next morning was killer. Ren had to catch a late flight back from Florida and hadn’t gotten home until late. He was glad all he had to do all day was file paperwork. If he was lucky, he could lock himself in his office and steal a nap sometime in the afternoon. It wasn’t like anyone would stop him.

Phasma, one of their lead agents, stopped him on his way to his office. “Hey, Ren,” she said. “Snoke wants that paperwork on the Fletcher mission done before noon. He asked me to pass that along.”

Ren groaned. That was the mission he had completed on Friday. “Fine,” he said. “I’ll get it done.”

Phasma nodded at him and walked away.

A few other agents greeted him before he finally made it into his office, ready to lock himself in for the day and hope no one bothered him, but when he opened the door, he realized someone was sitting in his chair, and then he saw whom it was.

“Hux, what the fuck?” Ren said, irritated at the intrusion. “Look, I’m really not in the mood today. Can you get out?”

Hux only smirked at him, leaning back comfortably in Ren’s chair.

“Tell me, Ren,” Hux said, his smirk growing wider. “How was Florida?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, I love a good cliffhanger. Hope you enjoyed!


	10. Favor

Ren felt a sick drop in his stomach. He did what he could to keep a straight face, though he came very close to letting his jaw drop in shock at Hux’s words. He managed to keep a passive expression on his face.

“What are you talking about?” Ren asked in what he hoped sounded like a bored tone.

Hux was still smirking at him. “Don’t play dumb with me, Ren. It’s unbecoming of you.”

“Hux, you’re delusional,” Ren told him, taking a few steps closer to his desk. “Get out or I’ll make you get out.”

“Yes, go ahead and do that,” Hux said, still not getting up from Ren’s chair. “And when you do, I’ll be sure to head straight to Snoke’s office and tell him about your excursions with the J.C. girl.”

Ren couldn’t hold back his shock this time. So Hux knew. He had been hoping that maybe he had just figured out that he went to Florida and that was it, but he knew about Rey. This was bad. Hux was the last person in the world he’d want holding information over his head.

Without saying anything, Ren turned and closed the door to his office, wanting to prevent any eavesdropping. “How do you know?” Ren asked Hux when he turned back to him.

“I bugged your phone,” Hux said.

Ren clenched his jaw, furious. “ _When_?” he barked out, moving closer to his desk again.

“After your mission at the senator’s home,” Hux said, unfazed by Ren’s obvious anger. “You became so obsessed with finding her after that. I didn’t think it was just about revenge. So I bugged your phone, and it turns out I was right.”

Ren’s hands were curled up into fists at his sides, and he wanted nothing more than to pummel Hux right then and there.

“I heard your conversation over a week ago when you called her at her office,” Ren continued. “But I couldn’t be sure that was her. Neither of you brought up her work so she could have been any girl. But then I heard your conversation on Friday night.” Hux’s smirk became even wider. “You did talk about work in that conversation, among other things, so I knew it was her then.”

Ren was horrified. Hux had heard his conversation with Rey from Friday, when he had made her come over the phone. Hux had heard Rey moan and keen just for him. It was a disgusting invasion of his privacy and especially hers. Ren could kill him for this.

“You’re sick,” Ren told him. He leaned over the desk, glaring at Hux and not hiding any of the disgust he felt. “You are a _sick fuck_.”

Not one to be looked down on, Hux stood up from his chair and looked him in the eye. Ren straightened as well, and took some gratification in the fact that he was taller than Hux.

Hux’s confidence still hadn’t wavered as he leaned forward on the desk, not backing down. “You make me so wet, Ren,” Hux said, and there was laughter in his voice. “Better than anyone else I’ve ever had.”

The last word had barely gotten out of Hux’s mouth before Ren grabbed hold of the front of Hux’s shirt, pulled him over the desk, and slammed him into the closest wall, not giving a damn if someone in the neighboring office heard it. Hux cried out in pain as his head hit the wall.

The little _rat_. Throwing Rey’s words back in his face? He’d kill him.

“Struck a nerve, did I?” Hux asked in a strained voice. Ren was holding him up off the floor, his toes were barely touching the carpet, but still, he knew he had the upper hand. “You don’t actually care for this girl, do you?”

Ren huffed and pushed him harder against the wall.

Hux smirked again. “Damn. This J.C. whore must have been the best shag of your life to get you so riled up like this.”

“If you know what’s good for you,” Ren said through gritted teeth. “You’ll stop talking about her like that.”

“And you’re defending her honor,” Hux said with a chuckle. “How noble of you. Now stop being a child and let go of me. There are matters we need to discuss.”

Ren hesitated for a moment, holding his glare, before he finally let him go, knowing that he was going to have to deal with the consequences of Hux knowing his secret.

When Hux dropped to the floor, he straightened his shirt and jacket stepped away from Ren, moving back around his desk and sitting in his chair again. “First, we need to address something,” Hux said, as if this was some kind of business meeting. “Did you give her any information on us?”

Ren was doing his best to keep himself calm, and tried to keep his thoughts in order. “You heard our conversations,” he said. “You should know.”

“I’ve only heard two of your conversations,” Hux said. “From those I didn’t gather much on what she knew about you. Does she know you work for the K.O.R.?”

Ren bit the inside of his cheek and took a breath before giving Hux a curt nod.

“Well, then.” Hux sighed. “Did you tell her anything else about us?”

“She knows I work for the K.O.R. and she’s shown up on a couple of my missions. Apparently she has a source, maybe on the inside, but I suspect it’s one of our former agents. I haven’t given her anything.”

“Are you sure?” Hux pressed.

“ _Yes_ , I’m sure.”

“Well, that’s good then.” Hux looked somewhat relieved. Perhaps he had been worried Ren would betray them. “What have you found out from her about the J.C.?”

“Nothing useful,” Ren said. Guilt was already swelling up inside of him. He didn’t want to give Hux any small piece of information he might have. Rey seemed like she was actually starting to trust him.

“Are you kidding?” Hux asked, he didn’t look like he believed him. “You’ve been fucking this girl for how long? And you haven’t gotten anything out of her? You must not be as good in bed as you think.”

Ren wanted to throw Hux against the wall again, but managed to restrain himself. “I’m not fucking her for information.”

“Well, as of now, you are.” Hux said, leaning back in the chair. “Your little fling is over. Now this is just another mission.”

Ren rested his palms on his desk and leaned closer to Hux, looking him in the eyes. “ _No_.”

Hux raised his eyebrows, unimpressed. “This isn’t exactly optional, Ren. You owe me a favor, remember? And if you don’t do this, I’m going straight to Snoke with this information, and I revel in the idea of what he would do to you if he found out you’ve been shacking up with the enemy. So this is me phoning in my favor as well as blackmailing you.”

Ren swallowed and straightened up again. His hands were tied. Hux had him trapped. He had no idea what Snoke would do to him if he found out, but he knew it wouldn’t be good. He’d fear for his safety as well as Rey’s. What Hux was demanding was not what he wanted to do. The idea of betraying Rey like this was like a knife in his gut, but he didn’t see much choice.

“What do you want me to do?” Ren asked, defeat apparent in his tone.

Hux smirked at Ren’s surrender to his demands. “You’ll go on as you have, but this is a recon mission now. Get her to tell you anything about the J.C., their missions, their agents, any prospective agents, and if you could tell us where they’re located. Once you have enough, we’ll bring the information to Snoke. I imagine Snoke would be so grateful that he’ll forget you were ever fucking an enemy agent.”

“She’s just as secretive as I am,” Ren tried to protest, but it sounded weak in his own ears.

“Oh do stop making excuses, Ren.” Hux said, annoyed. “I can’t even count how many missions you’ve been on that involve seduction. I’m sure you can put that mouth of yours to good use with this girl.”

Ren said nothing, not sure if there was anything he could say that would prevent this from happening.

Hux took his silence as an agreement. “You’ll report back to me with anything you’ve learned. I don’t want you keeping anything from me, Ren. If I don’t get anything from you soon, I’ll go straight to Snoke.”

“It’s going to take some time,” Ren said quietly. He wasn’t even looking at Hux anymore. He was staring at the floor.

“Then you’d better get started.” Hux said. “Call her now.”

*****

Rey was sitting at the hotel bar sipping her Jameson on the rocks. Ren had told her to meet him here. It was rather different from the last couple of places they had met. The hotel was a lot nicer than the previous places they had stayed in, and they were meeting later in the evening, which they hadn’t done before. She’d looked up the hotel before she went and when she saw how nice it was, she dressed for the occasion. Her white dress clung tightly to her upper body, loosened at the hips and flowed outward in elegant layers. The back of the dress was open, and the cut exposed her breasts just enough to tantalize the mind. She’d thought of Ren when she put the dress on, not that he needed to know that.

She noticed Ren the moment he walked into the bar. He was dressed in all black, a stark contrast to her white dress. His hair looked wind blown, like he had just gotten off of his bike. He probably had. It only took him a few seconds to spot her. She offered a smile as he approached and stood up from her stool. His eyes were trailing up and down her body.

When he reached her, Rey was going to say something, but before she could, he took her face in his hands and kissed her. Rey was surprised. He had never done anything like that before, not in public. She gasped in surprise and he used the opportunity to deepen the kiss. Rey kissed him back for a few seconds before she remembered there were other people in the bar. She pushed at Ren’s chest.

“Ren,” she got out, his lips still seeking hers. “We’re in public. Stop.” She could feel herself blushing. A few people in the bar were glaring at them.

“Sorry,” he said, smirking. He gave her another peck on the mouth. “I saw you in that dress and I couldn’t help myself.”

Rey licked her lips and sat back down on her stool. Ren sat down in the one next to her, turning it so his legs were brushing hers.

“Can I get you something to drink, sir?” the bartender asked Ren.

Ren didn’t take his eyes off her as he answered. “Bourbon.”

The bartender walked off to retrieve his drink.

Ren put his hand on Rey’s back and began trailing his fingers up and down her bare skin. She blushed further under his intense gaze. “What’s going on with you tonight?”

Ren bit the inside of his cheek and his face softened. “Nothing,” he said. “I just missed you.”

“Well, it hasn’t been all that long,” Rey said. “I was surprised you called me so quickly. It hasn’t even been a week since Florida.”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed,” he said. “But I’m not exactly the most patient person in the world.”

“No, you aren’t,” Rey agreed.

“Your drink, sir,” the bartender said and placed Ren’s drink in front of him.

“Thank you,” Ren said, picking it up from the counter and taking a sip.

“What have you been up to?” Rey asked.

Ren placed his drink back on the counter. “Just work as usual,” he said, his eyes still on his drink. “Few problems with a coworker.”

“You? Having problems with someone?” Rey joked. “I can’t imagine.”

“Funny,” he said, but he didn’t sound amused.

Rey bit her lip and changed the subject. “I thought you’d have a mission tonight, after your last one and all.”

Ren didn’t say anything for a moment. “They’re keeping me busy,” he said simply.

“Well, I’m happy to fit into your schedule,” she said and took another sip of her drink.

“Do you have anything going on?” he asked. “Do they still have you off missions?”

“Yeah,” she said with a huff. “But I think they’re starting to relax. There have been no mishaps on other missions since you showed up on mine. So I don’t think it will be long before they have me in the field again.”

“Anything exciting?” he asked, picking up his drink for another sip.

She side eyed him as he sipped his drink. “I don’t know yet,” she said. It was true. Luke had told her there are a few missions coming up that he wanted her on, but he hadn’t given her the details. “I’ll have to wait until they give me the green light.”

His finger slipped under one of her dress straps. “The guy I was staking out last week,” he started, his voice dropping lower. “He’s on the terrorist watch list.”

Rey’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Are you serious?”

Ren nodded gravely. “I did say it wasn’t a mission for people on a lower pay roll.”

“Are you gonna have to take him out?” Rey whispered, eager for more information. Following a possible terrorist around was more dangerous than any mission she’d ever been on.

“I don’t know,” he said, keeping his voice low. “He’s only on the watch list. They don’t know yet if he really is a terrorist. That’s why I was watching him. I’m meant to report any suspicious activity.”

“And did you see anything?” she asked.

“The people he was hanging around didn’t exactly scream ‘innocence’ to me,” Ren said, taking another sip of his drink. “But it wasn’t enough. They’ll probably have me follow him again soon.”

Rey swallowed. She’d never liked missions where she had to just follow people around, but that one sounded like something she’d want to do, if she ever qualified for a mission so dangerous. “Why are you telling me this now?” she asked him.

He shrugged, and his hand moved lower on her back. “I feel bad that you’re not on missions because of me,” he said. “Figured I’d share a little bit of my work so you can live vicariously through me.”

“Cute,” she said with a chuckle.

Ren leaned in close and pecked her on the mouth again. Her breath caught in her throat and she felt her whole body tense. He rubbed his nose against hers gently. “Let me take you to bed.”

She managed to get a breath out and give him a gentle nod. Her whole body was tingling with excitement the way it always did around him. His hand trailed down from her back, down her arm, to her hand, and he intertwined his fingers with hers. He stood up from his stool then, pulling her with him. He led her out of the bar and to the elevators, holding her hand the whole time.

“What room are we in?” Rey asked as he pressed the button to call the elevator.

“1037,” Ren told her.

The elevator door opened and they stepped inside.

When they were alone in the elevator, Ren pressed the button for the tenth floor and kissed her again. He pushed her back against the elevator wall, his arms wrapping around her and pulling her close. Rey responded eagerly, burying her hands in his hair and deepening the kiss. She was ready to let him take her right there in the elevator before the door opened and she pushed him away.

A man and a woman were standing outside of the elevator, looking at them with shocked expressions. They were stopped on the fifth floor. Rey felt her whole body turn red, while Ren only looked amused.

“I think we’ll just get the next one,” the woman said, clearly uncomfortable.

The elevator doors closed, leaving them alone again. Ren moved closer to her and dipped his head to kiss her again, but Rey stepped away from him.

“Nope,” she said. “I’m not risking that humiliation again.”

Ren raised an eyebrow and stepped closer to her. “Don’t make me chase you, angel,” he said. He put his arms on either side of her head, caging her in. “That won’t end well for you.” He leaned closer and brushed his lips against hers.

“Is that so?” Rey asked, not intimidated. She trailed her hands over his waist. “You can’t really pull the macho card on me, Ren. Last time we were together, I rode you like a horse, and you loved it.”

“Maybe so,” he said. “But maybe not as much as you love being on your back underneath me.”

“Well, why don’t we see about that,” she said. Her fingers were dipped in his pocket and she was pulling out the key card.

Finally, the elevator door opened, and she darted under his arms and sped out the doors. She ran down the hall in the direction of their room. It wasn’t long before she heard Ren’s fast approaching footsteps behind her. She would have a hard time outrunning him. His legs were so much longer than hers, but when she looked over her shoulder, she saw that he was only walking a bit faster than normal, a smile apparent on his face.

When she reached the door to their room, she quickly stuck the key card in, but she did it too fast and it didn’t work. She tried again and it unlocked this time. She pushed the door open and she immediately felt Ren’s chest against her back as he pushed her through the door, his arms wrapping around her midsection. She dropped the key to the floor. He closed the door behind them, turned her around, and pushed her up against the wall.

“What did I say about making me chase you, angel?” he asked, brushing some of her hair behind her ear.

Rey smirked at him. Truthfully, his words had only made her want to run away from him, just so he would chase her and she could find out exactly what he meant. “You talk a big game, Ren,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I doubt you can live up to any of it.”

She was egging him on. They both knew it.

Ren tore her dress down the middle, exposing her breasts and rendering the dress useless.

“Hey!” Rey protested. “I liked that dress!”

“I’ll get you another,” he said. He tore off what remained of the dress and tossed it to the floor, leaving Rey in only her underwear. “I wanted to tear it off of you the second I saw you downstairs.”

He bent down to kiss her neck, and Rey was lost in the sensation for a moment, but she was still mad about the dress. Out of spite, she reached up to the collar of his button down and tore it. Buttons went flying in every direction and his hard chest and stomach were exposed.

Ren chuckled against her throat. “You’re sewing those back on.”

“Not on your life,” she said into his ear.

Ren’s mouth came over hers again and she felt his hands move to cup her through her underwear. She gasped at his touch and pushed herself closer to his hand. He pushed her underwear aside and slipped a finger inside of her. Her hands pulled at his hair, encouraging him on as his mouth continued to move on hers. He brushed his thumb over her clit, eliciting a sharp moan from her throat. Her hips surged towards him and he chuckled. He continued rubbing her clit, soon moving his finger in and out of her in a slow rhythm. Her moans were growing louder.

Abruptly, he moved his hand away and detached his mouth from hers. Rey looked at him, confused. Ren dropped to his knees, looking up at her with that intense gaze of his.

“Eyes on me, Rey,” he said. “Or I stop.”

She locked her eyes on his. He pulled her underwear down her legs and she stepped out of them. He gripped her hips in his large hands, and then he pressed his lips against her clit. The wet heat of his tongue brought out a groan from Rey. He licked and sucked at her before she felt two of his fingers slip inside of her again. He kept his eyes on her face, watching her come undone. She wanted to throw her head back against the wall and close her eyes, surrender to the pleasure, but she knew he would stop if she did, and she couldn’t bear that. It wasn’t long before she felt herself coming to the breaking point, and she wondered if Ren would deny her orgasm like he had last time. His eyes stayed locked on her face and she knew he could feel it coming too. As her climax came over her, she buried her hands in his hair and held his gaze. He watched her the whole time, taking her in.

Rey slumped against the wall, needing its support. She was aware of Ren standing back up, his gaze still intense on her face. He pulled his shirt the rest of the way off and began to undo his belt. Rey glanced over to the hotel bed. It was still untouched and looked rather appealing.

“Ren, should we—the bed?” she got out. Her voice sounded tired.

“No,” he said, pulling her hips against his. “I want you here.”

He reached down to her thighs and pulled her up so he was standing between her legs. He pushed her up against the wall and held her there. She watched as he undid the button of his pants. When he released his cock from his pants, Rey reached down and stroked him, and was rewarded with a loud moan from Ren. He slammed his fist against the wall and seemed to be running out of patience. He pulled her hand away from him and lined himself up with her wet entrance, then he pushed himself in and she felt her walls stretch to accommodate him. He had been inside of her a few times now, but still, her body needed to adjust to the size of him every time.

Ren didn’t give her much time to adjust before he began to move. His movements were quick and jerky, like he wanted to finish quickly. Rey dug her nails into his shoulders, urging him on. She loved the feeling of his hard body under her hands. She wrapped her legs tighter around his waist as he pounded into her. She would surely have bruises on her back the next day as he was pushing her into the wall, but she didn’t care. He pulled his face back and pressed his lips against hers. She opened her mouth for him and let his tongue tangle with hers. He groaned into her mouth, his movements growing faster. She could tell he was getting close.

Suddenly, Ren’s hand moved down to her clit and he began rubbing her. She gasped against his mouth. “Ren,” she groaned out. “I don’t think I can—”

“You can,” he said against her lips. “You will. Come for me, Rey.”

Rey threw her head back against the wall and let out an even louder moan as he continued to rub her clit.

“I need to feel you come, Rey,” he said. His lips were on her throat now. “Come for me, angel. I know you can.”

His fingers on her clit and his cock moving in and out of her brought her over the edge. She came around him with a sharp cry, her fingers digging so hard into his shoulders that she swore she drew blood. Ren groaned at the feeling of her orgasm, and came right after, spilling himself inside of her.

Rey held on to Ren, not sure if she could stand. He kept his face buried in her neck, and she felt him place small, wet kisses on her skin.

“I’m gonna make you chase me more often,” Rey said, breathless.

“Just don’t do it again tonight,” Ren said. “Not sure if I could go like that again.”

Rey chuckled and Ren removed his hands from her legs and set her down. When he released her, her shaky legs wouldn't support her weight. He surprised her by lifting her up into his arms, one hand under her knees and the other at her back, and carrying her to the bed. He set her down against the pillows and pulled the blanket over her naked body. He moved around to the other side and got into bed with her, pulling her against his chest and wrapping his arms around her.

Rey took Ren’s hand in hers and kissed it. “I like you,” she said.

Ren chuckled at her words. “Well, I would hope you like me considering what we’ve been doing the last few weeks.”

“Yeah, but I’ve had relationships before with people I didn’t even like,” she said. “But not you. I actually like you. I don’t know why. You drive me crazy.”

“I think that’s why you like me.” He chuckled. “That and my dazzling personality.”

“You’re difficult, stubborn, and arrogant,” she listed off. She craned her neck so she could look at him. “But I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone so much like me before.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” he said quietly.

“I don’t know if you should.” She bit her lip.

Rey scanned his face. He wasn’t looking at her. He was looking down at the foot of the bed. “Hey,” she said. She reached up and cupped his cheek in her hand, trying to turn him so he would look at her. “Is something wrong?”

His eyes met hers, and for a moment he looked…sad. It caught her off guard.

He didn’t say anything for a moment, but he gave her a small smile. “No,” he said. “I’m fine. I just…I like you too.”

Rey licked her lips and tilted her head to the side. “Well, I’m glad we could get that out of the way.”

“Can you do something for me, Rey?” Ren asked her.

“Sure,” she said. “What is it?”

“Kiss me,” he said.

Rey smiled. That was a task she was most definitely up to. She leaned forward and pressed her lips against his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, Ren. What's a guy to do? I hope you liked it. Let me know what you think!


	11. Clash

“I know it’s been a while for you, Rey,” Luke said on Monday morning in his office. He was sitting at his desk, looking at her with his hands clasped together in front of him. “But I was finally able to convince my sister that there are no risks in sending you on a mission.”

Rey did her best to keep from leaping out of her chair and hugging Luke in excitement. “Thank you, sir,” she said, smiling. “Does that mean the investigation you had going is over?”

“For the most part, yes,” he said. “I never believed we had a mole, and we found nothing to indicate we might have a mole. What happened on your two missions, I believe, was pure bad luck.”

Rey glanced to the side. “I’m glad to hear that,” she said. It was a relief knowing the investigation was over. “And is your sister as convinced as you are?”

Luke shrugged. “Probably not,” he said. “But I do believe she is starting to relax about this, finally.”

“I’m glad.” Rey nodded. “So…you said you have another mission for me?”

He smiled. “I do,” he said. “One of your regulars. It should be a piece of cake for you.”

Rey leaned forward in her chair, ready to be briefed. “What is it?”

Luke opened a drawer of his desk and took out a packet of papers, dropping them on his desk. “His name is Liam Rice.”

For the next half an hour, Luke briefed her on the target. Rice was a member of the secret service and was believed by his superiors to be leaking government secrets to North Korea. His death was not to be a big show, as they did not want much attention to be drawn to this. She would slip him poison while he was at a bar this Friday night. Nothing she hadn’t done before.

“I trust you with this, Rey,” Luke said when he was finished. He slid the packet of papers on his desk towards her.

Rey stood from her chair and picked up the papers outlining her mission. “Yes, sir,” she said. “Thank you.”

Luke gave her a smile and a nod before dismissing her. When she walked out of his office, she was practically grinning. Being sidelined for the last few weeks had been torture. She was one of the J.C.’s best. She should not be sitting on the bench watching everyone else go to work.

She stopped by Finn’s office as she made her way to her own. “Guess who’s back on missions,” she said, holding the packet out in front of her.  
Finn was at his desk, and he looked up at the sound of her voice. When her words registered, he smiled. “Finally!” he said. “I swear they were giving me all your missions. I had twice the work.”

“Well, I’m happy to take that weight off of you,” she said. “I owe you that much.”

“Don’t be silly, Rey,” Finn said, shaking his head. “I’m just glad we have you back.”

“Me too,” she said. “Lunch today? I’ll tell you about my mission.”

He nodded. “Sounds good.”

She backed out of the doorway and headed towards her own office. When she reached it, she opened the door and closed it behind her. She reached for her phone, which was sitting on her desk, and went to her contacts list. She stopped then, and realized she was about to call Ren. Her first instinct had been to call and tell him what had just happened. She didn’t know what to make of that, but she didn’t want to dwell on it. She hit the call button next to Ren’s name.

*****

“You’re honestly telling me you didn’t get _anything_ out of her?” Hux hissed at Ren.

They were in Ren’s office. Hux had come to see him that Monday morning, pissed that he hadn’t called after seeing Rey on Friday. Ren had spent the weekend ignoring Hux’s calls, and he was paying the price for it now.

“Are you really as stupid as you look?” Ren asked. “Even you should know this would take some time. Did you expect me to have the address of the J.C. base after seeing her for one evening?”

“No, but I expected you to have _something_ ,” Hux said. “On every recon mission you’ve ever been on, you’ve only needed a few hours to get what we needed.”

“Do you even understand who it is I’m trying to get information _from_ , you imbecile?” Ren barked out, leaning forward in his chair. “This girl isn’t some corporate idiot or drug trading lowlife. She’s a J.C. agent working under Skywalker. She’s not going to give me whatever I ask after a few good fucks. This is going to take _time_.” Ren hated himself more with every word that left his mouth.

Hux was silent for a moment before putting his hands on Ren’s desk and leaning forward. “Just know this, Ren,” he said quietly. “If I find out you are concealing any information from me, you won’t have to just worry about what Snoke will do to you, but what he’ll do to your little J.C. agent too."

Ren gritted his teeth. He didn’t take well to being threatened, especially by the absolute scum of the earth. Hux threatening Rey made it even worse. But he knew he was right. Snoke would have Rey hunted down and killed if he knew what was going on between them. Ren stood up from his chair.

“If it weren’t for Snoke,” Ren said, his calm voice making his rage. “I would have killed you years ago.”

They stood there and glared at each other for a few moments before a phone rang. Ren glanced down at his desk and realized it was his cellphone that was ringing. Before he could pick it up, Hux snatched it off his desk and looked at the screen.

“It’s her,” Hux said.

Ren felt his stomach drop.

Hux handed the still ringing phone over to him. “Put it on speaker.”

Ren glared at him, but did as Hux said. He answered the phone and put it on speaker. “Hello?” he said.

“Ren!” Rey’s voice came from the other line. Ren loved the sound of her voice, but hated that Hux was listening. “I’m back on missions!”

Ren’s eyes immediately snapped up to Hux’s face. Hux was smirking. Ren had a hard time imagining how Rey’s timing could have been worse.

“That’s great,” Ren said, masking his frustration. “Did you just find this out?”

“Yes, just now,” she said. “I’m finally off the bench. The mission is this Friday.”

“Anything interesting?” Ren asked. He didn’t want to, but with Hux standing there, he didn’t have much choice.

“How about I tell you on Friday?” Rey said. “Let’s meet up after my mission to celebrate.”

Ren looked at Hux again, and he gave him a “come on” hand movement.

“That sounds great,” Ren said, trying not to sound defeated. “Where do you want to meet?”

*****

Rey’s mission went off without a hitch. It wasn’t one of her easiest missions. Rice was a member of the secret service after all, and a few of the men he was hanging out with at the bar were also members. Sneaking poison into one of their drinks wasn’t the easiest job in the world, but she managed. After they had all had a few drinks, their faculties weren’t all there and she had been able to sneak up behind Rice and slip the poison into his drink without anyone noticing. After that, she stuck around to make sure he continued sipping his drink, and then she disappeared from the bar, her job done.

It felt good to complete a mission. It had been too long. She wasn’t the kind of person who liked staying still. She always felt better when she was doing things, and doing her job was a big part of that.

Her excitement only increased as she approached where she was going to meet Ren. She was in Washington D.C. and she had told him to meet her on a street in Foggy Bottom. She hoped she hadn’t kept him waiting long. She hadn’t been sure exactly how long her mission would take.

Ren was always easy to spot. He was standing next to the street sign dressed in all black, towering over anyone who walked by him. Rey smiled at the sight of him. He noticed her as she got closer, and Rey picked up her speed at little bit, and when she got close enough to him, she jumped into his arms and kissed him. Her legs wrapped around his waist and she could tell he was startled but it didn’t take long for him to kiss her back. Rey smiled against his mouth.

“Thought you weren’t big on P.D.A.,” Ren said when they came up for air.

“When I initiate it, I don’t mind,” she said.

He set her down on the ground. “I’m not sure if I find that fair, angel.”

Rey took his hand. “You’ll get over it,” she said. “Come on.” She started pulling him along next to her.

“I take it your mission went well,” he said as they walked hand in hand. “You seem to be in a good mood.”

Rey smiled. “I am,” she said. “It did go well, thank you. I finally got another mission and I got it done. It’s what I’ve wanted for weeks.”

“So your bosses aren’t suspicious anymore?” he asked.

She shook her head. “No. We’ve gotten through the worst of it. I don’t think they suspect any foul play anymore. Putting me back on missions means we’re about done with the crisis.”

“Good,” Ren said. “Now I don’t have to feel guilty over that anymore.”

“No, you can still feel guilty,” Rey said, squeezing his hand. “I’ve had a boring few weeks because of you.”

Ren nudged her shoulder with his. “I don’t think it was all boring.”

Rey blushed and glanced up at him. He was smirking at her. “You’ve got a big ego, Ren.”

“Maybe,” he said. “But I know I’m right in this case.”

“What about you?” she asked. “What's going on with your work?”

“I’m probably going to have to stake out that guy I told you about again,” he said. “The client’s suspicions haven’t gone away, and they called us again.”

“Oh shit,” Rey said. “They must really think he is a terrorist.”

“That’s the impression I’ve gotten,” he said. “But we’ll see if I can find anything.”

“When are you going to do that?” she asked.

“Sometime next week, if I had to guess.”

“Damn,” she said.

Ren shrugged and shifted his gaze. “It’s what we do.”

They arrived at the Hyatt. “We’re here,” Rey said, gesturing to the hotel. She’d already come by to check in earlier, so she had the key card in her pocket. “I got us a room on the first floor,” she said when they walked through the doors. “Thought we’d avoid a situation like last time.”

“I enjoyed last time.” Ren smirked.

Rey chuckled and pulled him down the hall towards their room. She released his hand when she reached the door. As she was putting the key card in the slot, she felt his hands move to her hips and he leaned down to kiss her neck. She smiled as his long hair tickled her skin. The key unlocked the door and she opened it, stepping inside.

When Ren closed the door behind them, she dropped the key to the floor and turned around to face Ren before standing up on her toes so she could kiss him. He responded eagerly, his large hands running up and down her back, tugging on her shirt. Rey grabbed him through his pants, surprising him and making him groan against her mouth. He was already hard and Rey smiled, loving that he responded to her so much. Her hands worked quickly on his belt while she kissed him.

He started pushing her back towards the bed, but Rey turned them around so she was pushing him towards the bed. When the back of his knees his the mattress, she sat him down and straddled his waist, kissing him hard. Ren buried his hands in her hair, encouraging her on. Rey ground herself into his hardness, his groans becoming even louder. She bit his lip then, and Ren responded by tugging her shirt roughly over her head and throwing it to the floor. His hands went to her breasts, cupping them through her bra. Rey tugged his shirt off to and her mouth went to his chest. She kissed her way down his chest and hard abs until she was on her knees and kissing just above the waistband of his pants.

She unbuttoned and unzipped his pants and tugged them down along with his briefs, exposing his hard cock. Ren was breathing heavily, watching her, and his hand was still buried in her hair. Rey didn’t hesitate before taking him in her mouth. He groaned immediately, his fingers lacing through her hair and pulling her closer. Rey watched him as he threw his head back, her own arousal growing quickly. Each flick of her tongue was causing a reaction through his body and she loved it. He gripped her hair harder as she took his full length into her mouth. He sputtered and thrust his hips towards her face. Her own hips rocked back and forth, following the movements of her mouth. She was becoming wetter with every moment.

“Rey, _Rey_! I’m gonna come,” Ren groaned out, warning her.

Rey removed her mouth from his cock and looked up at him. “We can’t have that so soon, can we?” she said, teasing him. She stood up and slid her pants down her legs. He kicked off his own pants, and moved back on the bed. Rey took off her underwear and bra, now completely bare before him, and straddled him on the bed. Her entrance was already wet and waiting for him as she slid his cock inside of her. They both paused for a moment, groaning and adjusting. It hurt a little, as it always did, particularly from this angle, and Rey did her best to adjust quickly. Ren moved first, sitting up so they were face to face. She began to move then, and his hands went to her hips, following her movements. She kept her eyes on his. His gaze was boring into hers.

She lifted herself up and set herself back down on him again and he groaned, his lips covering hers again as he thrust up into her. Rey moaned at the feeling, her arms wrapping around his shoulders and holding him closer. He stopped kissing her and buried his face into her neck, focusing on thrusting up into her. Rey moved with him, her nails digging into his hard shoulders.

“Ren… _Ren_ ,” Rey moaned. She clenched around him.

He groaned louder. “ _Fuck_ , angel. Do that again.” He was gripping her hips so tight she was sure he’d leave bruises. One of his hands moved between them to her clit and he began stroking her.

Rey gasped at the feeling and clenched around him again. She pressed her face against his shoulder as she felt herself coming closer to the breaking point. Ren kept stroking her clit and she continued her movements, wanting to bring him to his release too.

Ren suddenly pulled her face back so he could look at her again. His hand was still stroking her clit and his eyes were now intense on her face again. “I’m gonna come, Rey,” he groaned out.

His words somehow only brought her closer to her own orgasm. She nodded at him and kept rolling her hips. She felt him come inside her, and the feeling of it brought her own release. They came together, staring at each other and panting. Rey heard her name on Ren’s lips as he rode out his orgasm. She kissed his mouth, savoring the moment.

“Wow,” Ren whispered against her lips once they caught their breath. “You’re amazing.”

Rey chuckled. “You’ve only just figured that out?” Her voice sounded tired in her own ears.

Ren kissed her again. “No,” he said. “It just seemed like an opportune time to tell you.”

Rey lifted herself off of him and rolled onto her back, her head falling against the pillows. Ren lay down next to her.

“I’ve found a new appreciation for hotels,” Rey said, her chest rising and falling as she breathed heavily.

“Well, we have been spending a lot of time in them,” Ren said, glancing around the room pointedly.

“I know,” she said. “That’s where the appreciation comes from. I like being somewhere clean, and away from home.”

Ren nodded. “I know what you mean,” he said. “It feels…safe.”

Rey turned her head to the side so she could look at him. “Exactly.”

Ren looked back at her and leaned forward to kiss her again. “What were you up to tonight?” he asked quietly.

She shrugged. “My usual,” she said. “I took someone out.”

“Sniper?” he asked.

“No,” she said. “Poison. Like when we ran into each other at the senator’s house.”

“Guy was dangerous?” he asked.

“Apparently,” she said, running her hand through his hair. “They thought he was leaking government secrets to North Korea.”

Ren’s eyebrows show up. “Holy shit,” he said. “And you thought my mission with the possible terrorist seemed bad.”

Rey shook her head. “I’d say yours is still worse. I only had to take him out, not follow him around.”

He gave a small nod. “I suppose,” he said. “Was it tough to sneak him the poison?”

“Tougher than usual, yeah,” she said. “The guy was a part of the secret service, so it should have been hard for me to sneak it by him.”

“Wow,” Ren said. He glanced away from her and up towards the ceiling. “That’s intense.”

“Nothing I couldn’t handle,” she said. Her hand moved across his chest and she pulled herself closer to him. “You don’t have to worry.”

Ren shook his head. “I don’t. I know you can handle yourself.”

“Then what is it?” Rey glanced up at his face.

He still didn’t look at her. “What is what?”

“You’re acting weird again,” she pointed out.

He did look at her then. He stared at her for a moment, her words lingering in the air between them before he leaned forward and kissed her. His arms went around her and he pulled her closer.

Rey kissed him back for a moment before pulling away. He was still holding her close. “No. Don’t do that.”

“What?” he asked, confused.

“Kiss me to avoid talking to me,” she said. “You do that too much.”

Ren sighed, exasperated. “What exactly do you want to talk about, Rey? It’s not like we usually do a lot of _talking_.”

Rey pulled herself out of his arms and glared at him. “Is that what it is, then? You meet up with me for sex and that’s all you want?”

“That’s not what I said—”

“Well that’s what I _heard_ ,” Rey snapped. “And it’s bullshit too. I’ve done more talking with you than I’ve done with anyone in a long fucking time. Don’t lie to me and say it’s not the same for you.”

Ren sat up straighter in the bed. “Fine, it’s true. But so what? What does it _matter_?”

“It does matter!” Rey raised her voice. “It means you should be able to tell me why you’re acting weird when I ask! But you still can’t even bring yourself to do that!”

“You don’t get to act like you’re sharing a lot while I’ve been silent,” Ren shot back. “That’s not fair. Neither of us says much of anything outside of work talk!”

“Then maybe we need to fix that,” Rey said. “Tell me why you always want me to look at you when you make me come.”

Ren looked at her like she had a screw loose. “Why do I—?” he sputtered. “What the fuck does that have to do with anything?”

“I asked you that before, and you didn’t answer me,” she told him. “Obviously it matters to you and I want to know why.”

“You’re being ridiculous—” he said.

“Fine. You don’t want to share? I’ll share,” Rey said. “I told you I’m in orphan. My parents aren’t dead. They left me at the foster home when I was four. I still remember them leaving me there.”

Ren didn’t say anything. He just stared at her.

“That’s not work talk,” she said. She could feel tears starting to form in her eyes and she hated herself for it. “That’s me sharing with you because I like you and I want you to know me. But you, for some reason, don’t feel the same way.” She slid herself off the bed and reached for her shirt, which was lying on the floor.

“Rey, don’t.” Rey could hear Ren get up from the bed.

Rey tugged on her shirt and underwear before turning to see him coming closer to her. He had pulled on his own pants and looked as sad as she felt. “You don’t trust me,” she said when he came close to her.

Confusion washed over his face. “That’s not true—”

“Then why don’t you _talk_ to me?” she asked. “You’ve been acting weird. Is it because you’re just here for sex? Is it because you want to end this?”

“ _No_ ,” Ren said immediately, his voice was breaking. His hands went to her biceps and he held onto her. “That’s not what it is.”

“Then _what_?” Rey asked, a tear escaping her eye.

Ren took a deep breath before answering. “I just want to protect you,” he said quietly.

Rey didn’t say anything for a moment. “What do you mean?”

“What we do…it’s dangerous,” he said, his voice sounded broken and sad. “For both of us. I just wish…we could leave it all behind. Go somewhere no one would know us…and have our own lives.”

More tears were escaping Rey’s eyes. She brought her hands up to his face, stroking his cheek with her thumb. “We could,” she said. “One day.”

“No,” he said. “We couldn’t.”

“ _Why_?” Rey asked. “Because of the K.O.R.?”

“I can’t leave them,” Ren said. He was finally looking into her eyes again.

“Why not?” Rey asked, exasperated. “Do you owe them a life debt or something?”

“It’s the only home I have,” he said, sorrow apparent in his voice.

Rey remembered what he had said to her before, about how he hadn’t been Ben in a long time, after he left his family. She wondered where his family was now. She wanted to ask him more questions, but she thought better of it. Instead, she leaned up and kissed him again. She had chastised him for doing this earlier, but now, kissing him seemed to be the only thing she could do in that moment.

Ren pushed her back gently against the wall, still kissing her softly. His hands moved from her biceps and wrapped around her back, holding her close. “You asked me before,” he said between kisses. “Why I always want you to look at me when I make you come.”

Rey nodded at him, worried that if she said anything, he would back off.

He looked at her closely. “I’ve destroyed so much,” he said. “My life…the people around me, everything. But not you.” His voice dropped lower. “When I see you…and I see your face when you come, when you feel good because of what I’m doing…if I can make you feel that way, then maybe I’m not a monster.”

Rey inhaled sharply at his confession. She brought her hand up to his face again. He closed his eyes at her touch, taking in the feeling.

“You’re not a monster, Ben.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They definitely needed to have a fight for the first time. Hope you liked how it went.
> 
> Tsk tsk, Ren. Still not coming clean. No one ever said he wasn't a seriously damaged individual. Guy probably thinks he's doing the right thing. We'll see how that pans out. Hope you enjoyed!


	12. Undoing

Ren knew what to expect when he walked into his office next Monday morning. Hux was becoming pathetically predictable. Just as he knew he would be, he was standing in his office, leaning against the wall, when Ren entered the room. Ren didn’t even bother acknowledging him as he shut the door behind him.

“If you tell me you have nothing again, I’m going to Snoke right now,” Hux said to him.

Ren didn’t look at him. He walked past him and dropped a file of papers on his desk, moving to take his seat.

Hux rounded on him, not taking well to being ignored. “Ren if you don’t say something so help me—”

“Did you hear about the secret service agent who died this weekend?” Ren said, finally looking at Hux.

Hux blinked, caught off guard. “I think I may have read something about that. Why?”

“It was her.” The words tasted like vinegar in Ren’s mouth. He hated giving Hux information that Rey had trusted him with, but he didn’t see a way around it. “She took him out. She used a poison. They thought he was leaking government secrets to North Korea. I got the impression that it was someone high up the government chain of command that hired her. If you do some digging, you could probably find out who that was.”

Hux just stared at him for a moment before nodding. “That’s good, Ren,” he said. “Finally, something useful.”

Ren’s eyes flashed dangerously. He felt like he just betrayed Rey and this sorry excuse for a human being was making light of it.

“Anything else?” Hux asked him, ignoring Ren’s obvious change in demeanor.

“No,” Ren said. “That’s it.”

Hux sighed. “Well, that will have to do for now. I’ll see what I can come up with.” He turned and started heading towards the door. When his hand was on the doorknob, he stopped and turned again. “By the way, you’re on the Fletcher mission again. They want you tailing him on Wednesday. I’ll email you the details.” He left the room then, shutting the door behind him.

When he was alone, Ren brought his hands up to his face and sighed. After what had happened between him and Rey on Friday, giving Hux information she had shared with him was brutal. She’d hate him for it if she knew, and he wouldn’t blame her.

He needed to see her again, but without Hux knowing. If he could have some time with her without coming back to Hux grilling him for information, that may do something to clear his conscience. He couldn’t see her before Wednesday. Fletcher was going to keep him occupied until then, but maybe Thursday. He took his phone out and sent Rey a text.

**Ren: Thursday? Chicago?**

They hadn’t spoken since they left the hotel on Saturday morning. After the incident on Friday night, he wasn’t sure how she would feel about seeing him again. If she chose not to…then maybe that would be better for her in the long run. He waited for almost a minute before she responded.

**Rey: Yes.**

A one-word answer. No indication of her mindset or how she felt about him now, but it did tell him she wanted to see him again even after seeing him in such a bad place on Friday. This was new for him, and he didn’t know how he felt about it. He sent her a text to let her know he’d send her the details later, and then he buried himself in his work, trying not to think of brown hair and hazel eyes.

*****

Rey wasn’t sure seeing Ren again was the best idea considering what had happened the week before. She had wondered if they needed some space from each other to think about things. But when Ren had texted her asking her to meet on Thursday, she’d had a hard time rejecting him. As difficult as their last meeting had been, she couldn’t help but want to see him. She wanted to be around him. She missed him when he was gone. She found herself wanting to talk to him about her days at work and her missions. The implications of that worried her. This relationship was becoming too complicated. When they started, it was more about mutual attraction and sex but now…she wasn’t sure what it was anymore.

These thoughts plagued her as she rode the elevator up to the eighth floor of the hotel Ren had asked her to meet him in. When the doors opened, she headed towards the room number he had given her, and when she reached it, she hesitated for a moment, taking a breath before knocking on the door.

Ren answered after a few seconds. He gave her a smile when he opened the door before standing aside so she could come in.

“Hey,” Rey said as she passed him.

Ren closed the door behind her. “Hi.”

Rey tossed her keys and wallet on the table before taking a deep breath. She stopped short when she smelled something familiar. She sniffed a few times and turned to Ren. “Have you been smoking?” she asked.

Ren shrugged sheepishly. “Yeah, on the balcony.”

She glanced around and saw a pack of cigarettes next to his phone on the bedside table. “I haven’t seen you smoke since the night I met you.”

“I don’t do it often,” Ren said in a low voice. “Only when I get the urge.”

Rey moved closer to him and put her hand on his chest. She leaned in and sniffed just under his chin. She could smell it on him. “You should stop,” she said. “That stuff will kill you.”

“Yeah, well so will our job,” he said as a matter of fact.

Rey couldn’t argue with him there.

“I was surprised you wanted to see me again so soon,” Rey said, taking her hand off his chest. “After last time, I thought you might want some space.”

Ren sighed and looked over her head. He seemed a little more guarded than usual, probably because of what happened when they last saw each other. “I do need space,” he said. “But not from you.” He looked into her eyes again.

“From the K.O.R. then?” Rey asked.

“Yeah, you could say that.” He put his hand on her lower back and drew her closer to him.

Absently, Rey wondered what it meant if Ren didn’t want to be around the K.O.R. Was he not pleased with how he was being treated? Was there any chance he’d leave? Last Friday she got the distinct impression that something was keeping him there, and that maybe he’d leave if he could.

“Well,” Rey said, reaching up to stroke his cheek. “I didn’t need space from you either.”

Ren almost looked relieved at her words. He leaned down and started kissing her neck, sucking and biting at her tender flash. Rey laced her fingers through his soft hair and held him there, savoring the feeling of his mouth on her skin. He started walking her backwards towards the bed as he kept kissing her. When the back of her knees hit the mattress, Rey briefly considered turning him around, pushing him down on the bed and getting on top of him, but she decided against it. Ren seemed to want her to follow his lead tonight.

He pushed her shoulders lightly until she was sitting down on the mattress. He stayed standing and unbuttoned his shirt before removing it. Rey scanned his chest, admiring his body. She reached down to pull off her own shirt and tossed it to the floor. Ren’s lips were on hers immediately when she threw her shirt to the side. He tasted like smoke and metal. He urged her back on the mattress with his hands, and she moved her body up so that her head was resting against the pillows. He crawled over her, one arm on each side of her head, and leaned down to kiss her again.

His gentleness was surprising. It had never really been like this between them before, light touches and soft kisses. Usually he took her hard and fast. The change was a little unsettling, though not unwelcome. She chose not to dwell on it.

He snaked one hand behind her back and undid her bra. She held out her arms so he could pull if off her and toss it away. His mouth went to her breasts then as his hands moved down to unbutton her shorts. She helped, lifting her hips off the bed so he could work them down her legs. He sat up for a moment so he could pull them all the way off of her along with her underwear. He settled himself on top of her again and kissed her mouth. His hand went from her breast to her midsection and Rey felt one of his fingers push inside of her. She gasped into his mouth at the feeling. She was already wet for him, his gentleness turning her on more than she would have thought it would. He worked her easily, thrusting his finger in and out and adding a second finer. He kept his eyes on her face as he did this.

“ _Ren_ ,” she breathed up at him. She wanted to kiss him.

He seemed to get the message because he leaned down and placed his mouth on hers again, his fingers continuing their movements inside her. Her hands moved to the belt of his pants and she began to undo it. His fingers curled inside her and she thrust her hips towards his.

“Ren, _please_ ,” she moaned out as she managed to unbuckle his belt. “I need you inside me.”

He nodded, removing his hand from her and pushing her hand away from his pants. He undid them himself and pushed them down his waist along with his briefs. Rey’s breathing picked up as he lined herself up with her entrance. She didn’t know why she felt so anxious. They had done this plenty of times before. But this time felt different. With one stroke, he pushed himself inside of her. Rey gasped as he filled her up and tried to adjust to him. His eyes held hers, waiting for permission to continue. After she squirmed around him for a moment, she gave him a nod. He leaned down and kissed her again before he started to move, not hard and fast as they usually did, but slow and tender. It was a stark contrast to every other time they had been together. Her hands clasped his arms and she moved with him.

His gaze held hers as he moved in and out of her. She couldn’t bring herself to close her eyes or look away. He was looking at her with such affection that she didn’t know what to do with it. She could only return his gaze.

“ _Rey_ …” he moaned out. He brought his forehead down against hers, still keeping eye contact, and he picked up his pace a little bit.

Rey wanted to close her eyes and surrender to the pleasure he was giving her, to lose herself in it, but his gaze held hers and she could not look away. Those dark eyes so filled with desire and warmth and something else that she couldn’t quite place. Her hips snapped up to meet his as she felt herself getting close to her release. She knew she’d have to keep her eyes open as she came, and she remembered when he revealed why he wanted her to do that last Friday. It was intimate, what he had told her, and she still didn’t know how she felt about it.

His movements were growing faster, and she knew he was close too. He reached down and rubbed her clit, trying to bring her to her orgasm, and that was all she needed before it crashed over her. He came at the same time, and they rode it out together, holding their gaze the entire time. Their breathing was heavy and he stayed inside her for a few moments. Not knowing what else to do, she leaned up and placed a soft kiss on his lips. He kissed her back lightly, and pulled out of her, rolling onto his back. They lay there for a few minutes, breathing heavily and staring at the ceiling.

“I liked that,” Rey said finally.

Ren licked his lips. “It was…different,” he said.

“It was,” she said. “But different is good. That’s why I liked it.”

Ren turned his head so he could look at her. Her hair was a mess, her lips were swollen, and she had red marks on her neck from where he had been sucking her skin. She looked beautiful.

“I’m not usually…like that,” he said quietly.

Rey turned to face him, her hand reaching out to hold his. “So why were you this time?”

“I needed it,” Ren said, his eyes dropping to her lips.

“You needed to be gentle with me?” Rey asked, her thumb stroking his wrist.

Ren nodded.

“Is this about what you said to me last time?” she asked. She remembered his words quite well, about feeling like a monster.

“Maybe,” he said lightly. “Among…other things.”

Rey had a strong feeling that she was not going to find out what “other things” were even if she asked him. “Well,” she said and leaned closer to him. “I liked it.” She pecked his mouth again and lay back on the pillows.

Ren nodded slightly and averted his gaze to the wall behind her.

“So,” Rey said, wanting to change the subject for both their sakes. “How is work?”

He seemed to lighten up a little when she asked that, as it was an easy topic. “That potential terrorist I’ve been telling you about, I followed him again yesterday.”

“You told me you might have to do that,” Rey said. “Did you see him do anything?”

Ren bit his lip. “I might have, but I can’t be sure quite yet. I reported it to the client, but we’ll see if that goes anywhere.”

“Aren’t you worried he knows you’re following him?” Rey asked. She wanted to know what it was Ren saw him doing, but she knew he wouldn’t tell her if she asked. “If he is a terrorist, he has to know that there’s a chance he’s being followed.”

“He probably does,” Ren agreed. “But I’ve been careful. I switch cars often, I wear different clothes and hats and sunglasses. It’s not something I’m new at.”

Rey bit the inside of her cheek. “I know,” she said. “It’s just…I worry.”

Ren gave a little half smile. “Glad to know you care.” He leaned forward and kissed her. “But I’ll be fine.”

Rey smiled in return and felt a little bit better about it.

“I’m gonna take a shower.” Ren said. He sat up on the bed and pulled his pants the rest of the way off.

“Okay,” she said. She thought for a moment about joining him, but shower sex had never really been her thing and she had a feeling that’s what would end up happening if she went with him. She admired his backside as he walked towards the bathroom. He threw her a smile over his shoulder as he entered and closed the door behind him.

When she was alone, Rey stood up and grabbed one of the robes out of the closet. She didn’t want to sit in the bed naked until Ren came back in. She pulled it around her body and lay back down on the bed. She picked up the remote from the table and turned on the TV. She heard the shower come on as she began flipping through channels, looking for something to watch.

She had finally settled on a guilty pleasure show, Say Yes to the Dress when she heard a phone buzzing. At first, she thought it was hers, and she glanced on the floor for her shorts, which still had her phone in the pocket. Then she realized the buzzing was coming from right next to her and she looked at the bedside table. It was Ren’s phone, sitting next to the pack of cigarettes she had noticed earlier, that was buzzing. She looked a little closer and realized that he was getting text messages, not a phone call. She bit her lip and glanced at the bathroom door. It would be an invasion of privacy to look at his messages, but she really wanted to know more about that potential terrorist. Maybe that’s what the texts were about. Before she could dwell on it further, she picked up the phone and looked at the screen.

She couldn’t open it. The phone was password protected, but she could see the messages as they popped up on the screen.

**Hux: Ren, where are you?**

Hux? Rey didn’t recognize that name. She assumed it was someone Ren worked with.

**Hux: Are you with the girl?**

Rey frowned at that message. What girl? The phone buzzed again as another message came in.

**Hux: I know you flew to Chicago. You’re not supposed to see this girl without telling me. You’d better get more information for me this time.**

Rey’s eyes widened at that message and she dropped the phone back on the bedside table as if it had burned her. This Hux person was messaging Ren about meeting a girl he needed to get information out of. Rey couldn’t help but automatically assume it was her that he was talking about. Ren hadn’t told her about any other recon mission he had been on recently. Suddenly, the pieces started to come together. He had been acting strange lately and refused to give her a real answer whenever she asked why, and it had seemed like he had been asking her more questions about her work lately. He had also been more willing to talk about his work…probably to get her to open up to him more. That was something she herself had been trained to do.

She thought back to the senator’s gala where they ran into each other again, that was when their continuous meetings really started. He had told her that he hadn’t followed her there, but what if he had? Had he been playing her since then? Too much was starting to make sense, and Rey felt tears spring into her eyes as she realized the implications of this. Was any of it even real? Her mind raced back to everything she had ever told him about the J.C., and she hoped she hadn’t told him anything too crucial.

Heartbreak was washing over her but she knew she needed to think quickly about what to do next. She wiped the tears away from her eyes. Ren didn’t know she knew. She could still play along and get out of this hotel. She couldn’t leave while he was in the shower. That would set him off. She’d have to wait until he came out again and make up some excuse to leave. After that…well, she’d figure out what to do when she got that far.

She heard the shower turn off in the bathroom. Rey did her best to settle herself back against the pillows and immerse herself in the TV show where the bride was picking some hideous mermaid dress that she would never be caught dead in. She did her best to look nonchalant, and hoped it was working. That was how Ren found her a minute later when he stepped back into the room. He had just a towel around his waist. Rey did her best not to stare at him. Seeing him was harder, now that she knew what he had been hiding from her.

“That dress is hideous,” Ren said when he looked at the TV.

Rey swallowed and did her best to chuckle. “You watch this show?”

Ren shrugged and stepped closer to the bed. “Guilty pleasure.”

Rey tried to force a convincing smile. “Same.”

“Another thing we have in common,” Ren said. He sat down on the bed and moved closer to her. He pulled her knees apart and began kissing his way up her leg.

Rey’s breath hitched as she realized what he was doing. “Ren, I can’t,” she said quickly.

He looked up at her quizzically. “Why not?”

“I have to get going,” she told him. She pulled away from him and swung her legs off the side of the bed.

“Already?” Ren asked, confused.

Rey stood up and took a deep breath. She was being too hasty. He’d be suspicious if she just threw on her clothes and left now. She turned around to face him. He was sitting on the end of the bed, looking at her. She moved closer to him and straddled his waist before kissing him on the mouth. He responded eagerly, his arms going around her waist. She ran her fingers through his wet hair and clasped at his strong shoulders. Ren turned them over to she was on her back underneath him and kept kissing her. She was very aware of their lack of clothing. His towel was starting to come undone.

“Ren, you just took a shower,” Rey said against his mouth, trying to dissuade him.

He stayed on course, pushing her robe to the side and exposing her breasts. “I can take another.”

“Ren, I said I can’t,” she said, pushing at his shoulders a bit. “I want to, but I can’t.”

He sighed against her mouth and held himself up on both arms so he could look down at her. “Do you have to get back?”

She nodded. “I wish I could stay, but I have to get going.”

“Alright,” he said and pulled himself off of her.

Rey got up off the bed and began dressing herself. She was well aware of Ren’s eyes on her as she moved around the room. She tried to ignore it. When she pulled her shoes on, she looked at him again. He was still sitting on the bed. She needed him to be convinced. She went over to him and kissed him on the mouth again, hard enough to convince him, but not so much that he would pull her onto the bed again.

“Thank you for tonight,” she whispered to him when she released him from the kiss.

Ren nodded and took her hand in his. “Thank _you_.” He squeezed her hand.

Rey licked her lips and did her best to smile before turning around and walking away from him, her hand slipping out of his as she went. She picked up her wallet and her keys from the table by the door and turned back to Ren.

“I’ll see you soon,” she said with a small smile.

Ren smiled and nodded. “Soon.”

She left then, closing the door behind her. She walked quickly to the elevators, almost jogging. Her mind was racing. She had no idea what her next move would be. When she reached the elevators, she pressed the pressed the down button and waited for it to arrive, part of her worried that Ren would figure out what had happened and chase after her. She impatiently waited for the elevator, tapping her foot as the seconds ticked by. When it finally opened, she stepped inside, pressed the button for the first floor, and watched as the doors closed.

Then, and only then, did she allow herself to cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I'm sorry this chapter took so long. Things have been crazy, but I finally got it updated. Hope you like it. I promise not to take as long with the next chapter.


	13. Strife

Hux had been texting and calling him all night. After Ren had gotten off the plane from Chicago early Friday morning, he checked his phone to find thirty-two text messages and fifteen missed calls. Ren had ignored all of them, opting instead to deal with Hux when he got to work that morning. He knew he was playing with fire, but he just didn’t care anymore. This had gone on long enough. Ren would rather Hux went to Snoke right now than have to lie to Rey for another minute.

After a quick stop at his apartment, Ren headed for work, ready for what was waiting for him. He had barely gotten off the elevator before Hux spotted him and made a beeline towards him. Ren didn’t bother avoiding him. Hux was not going to be ignored this morning.

“I need to talk to you _now_ ,” Hux hissed when he reached him.

Ren didn’t protest as Hux grabbed his arm and pulled him into his office, shutting the door behind him. Ren scanned the room. It was rare that he spent time in Hux’s office. He spent most of his time avoiding this room.

Hux stood directly in front of him, his eyes blazing. “You were with the girl last night, weren’t you?”

Ren gave him a curt nod.

“You were supposed to tell me every time you planned to see her,” Hux sputtered, his voice getting louder.

Ren just stared at him.

“Dammit, Ren!” Hux shouted. “If you don’t say something I’ll—”

“Go ahead,” Ren said.

Hux blinked at him, caught off guard. “ _What_?”

“Go ahead and tell Snoke,” Ren said simply. “That’s what you were about to say, right? That you’re going to tell Snoke? Well, go ahead and do it.”

Hux swallowed. “The girl. What did she—”

“No,” Ren said, his voice harsh. He stood as tall as his formidable frame would allow him. “I’m done. I’m not giving you anything else. So go and tell Snoke.”

Hux narrowed his eyes at him suspiciously. “If you think I won’t—”

“No, that’s not what I think,” Ren said, his mouth in a hard line. “You go ahead and tell him. I’ll wait here for him to call on me once you’re done.”

Hux just stared at him for a moment, the surprise apparent on his face. “Alright then,” he said, trying to maintain the superior edge to his voice. He turned away from Ren and moved towards the door.

“Of course,” Ren said when Hux’s hand reached the doorknob. “I’ll have to tell Snoke that you were keeping this from him for weeks now.”

Hux froze, his hand still on the doorknob. He slowly turned his head back towards Ren. “What?”

Ren’s mouth quirked up. “You know how Snoke feels about secrets, and when he finds out you’ve been keeping this from him for so long, I can’t imagine what he’ll do to you.”

“No,” Hux moved away from the door and approached him again. His voice was angry. “I tried to use this for the K.O.R.’s benefit, he’ll see that.”

“Will he really?” Ren was almost laughing at him. “After all, you barely have anything to show for your efforts. He’ll just see that as more evidence of your failure.”

Hux clenched his jaw, and Ren could tell he was trying to keep it together. “Are you actually _blackmailing me_?”

“It’s not fun, is it?” Ren asked with a raise of his eyebrow. He leaned in closer to him. “Now, listen to me you little bastard. I’m going to continue my relationship with Rey with no interference from you. You’re not going to contact me about her. You’re not going to talk to me about her in the office. You’re going to forget you ever knew about us. And if you go to Snoke, I’ll be sure to tell him you’ve been keeping this from him.”

With that, Ren walked to the door of Hux’s office.

“This won’t last, Ren.” Hux’s voice came from behind him.

Ren glanced over his shoulder at him.

“You know it won’t,” Hux said. “Snoke will find out, or the J.C. will find out. The two of you…there is no happy ending.”

Ren glared at him for a moment before walking out of Hux’s office and closing the door behind him.

*****

Rey had taken the day off from work. When she had first gotten home from Chicago, she cried. Before all of this, she couldn’t even remember the last time she cried, but she cried from the feeling of betrayal. She’d had a boyfriend before who had cheated on her, but this was worse. She didn’t know if Ren had any feelings for her at all. If this had all been a game to him, and she had poured her heart out to a man who didn’t care for her in the least. She hadn’t been able to sleep the whole night. She just stared up at the ceiling, questions racing through her mind, and it wouldn’t be long before tears sprang into her eyes again.

It was morning now, and she felt like she could cry no more. Instead, she was thinking. Crying was going to get her nowhere. If Ren had been spying on her this whole time, she needed to figure out exactly what he knew. She knew for a fact that she had never given him anything too crucial about the J.C. She had never even mentioned Luke to him. The most important information she had ever given him was about her missions, but she had never given up the names of her clients.

She wondered how long it would have been before she would have been willing to give him information he really could have used. Based on their last few encounters, she imagined it wouldn’t have been too much longer. But she knew what was going on now, and things were different. He wasn’t going to get anything else out of her.

She had been contemplating what she was going to do next since she left Ren in the hotel room. Her first thought had been to never see him again. That was the most obvious course of action. Change her phone number so he couldn’t contact her again, and just forget he ever existed. But Rey wasn’t entirely sure that would work. He had found her before without her telling him where she would be. He could do it again if she stopped talking to him and he came looking for her.

She could got to the J.C. and tell them everything. The guilt over keeping this relationship from them had been weighing on her for a while now. If she told them, they could help keep her off Ren’s radar so he couldn’t find her. But they also may throw her out of the J.C., and Rey wasn’t sure what she would do if that happened. Luke may understand, but she didn’t know about the higher ups. The thought of going to the J.C. and telling them would have unpredictable results.

But that left her with the most daunting option. Confront Ren. She had no idea how that would go down should she do it. He may try to kill her, or kidnap her and take her back to the K.O.R. so they could get more information out of her. If she was going to confront him, she’d have to do it in such a way that she knew she’d be safe. She couldn’t be caught at a disadvantage when confronting him about something like this. She didn’t know what kind of results she’d get out of confronting him. She could find out everything he had been keeping from her, and perhaps make sure he never tried to find her again, but it could go badly very easily if she slipped up.

Rey knew she had already made her decision.

*****

A cabin in the woods. So cliché, but it was perfect for what Rey needed to do. It was Saturday night. Rey had texted Ren the day before about meeting up. The cabin was in Virginia. Not far from civilization, but far enough so Rey felt they were a safe distance away from other people.

She’d spent the last hour making sure everything was ready. This had to go off without a hitch or she would be found out. She’d done this kind of thing with men before, but never with a man who was in the same line of work as her. This was going to be tricky, but as long as Ren didn’t know she knew anything, she felt like she could do it.

Rey heard his motorcycle approaching and her heart rate shot up, anxious feelings overwhelming her. She took a deep breath and looked around again to make sure everything was in its place, the sound of his engine coming closer racking up her nerves. She knew she was ready. The motorcycle stopped in front of the cabin and she heard his footsteps approaching the door, and finally, she heard a knock.

Rey moved towards the door and paused for a moment, gathering herself, before swinging it open. Ren was there, looking as he always did. His long hair was tousled from his ride here. He was wearing a white shirt with a leather jacket, the same one he always wore.

“Hi,” she said, giving him a smile. Seeing him was difficult. She had to fight back tears that threatened to spring into her eyes.

He took her in too, his eyes moving down her body. She had dressed to impress that night, in her leather pants and cleavage-bearing top.

“Hey,” he said with a smile. “Can I come in?”

Rey moved aside and let him step into the cabin. He was so much bigger than her. She remembered how she’d found that daunting the first time they met, and those same feelings were returning. She closed the door after he stepped in and locked it.

When she turned back to him to say something, he was on her. She felt his lips press against hers and he pushed her back into the door. She hadn’t been expecting that. Ren was always eager, but they usually talked before they got to this. His hands were moving on her, down to her hips and pulling them flush against his. Rey gripped the doorjamb next to her. Kissing him when she knew everything didn’t feel right, but still, she kissed him back so he wouldn’t expect anything. When she felt him trying to lift her up, she put her hands on his chest and pushed him away, but not too hard.

“What has you so eager?” she asked him. She sounded breathless.

He shrugged. “Maybe it’s the great outdoors. Why’d you pick a cabin?”

She smiled. “Oh, I like the privacy. Figured we could use a break from hotels.” She stepped away from him then, walking towards the couch in the living room.

“Well, it was a nice choice,” he said, following her.

Rey was leaning against the back of the couch. Ren came to a stop in front of her, exactly where she wanted him. She smiled up at him. “And besides,” she said, standing up and moving closer to him. “Out here, we won’t wake any neighbors.”

He smiled at the implication of her words and she leaned up and kissed him. He responded immediately, but before he could push her back against the couch, Rey pushed him backwards, walking him towards a chair at the dining room table, her lips staying on his the whole time. When the back of his knees hit the chair, she pushed him down so he was sitting in it and straddled his waist. She could already feel him getting hard beneath her. She rolled her hips into his; encouraging him further, and she heard him moan deep in his throat. His hands were at her waist, but she took the opportunity to grab his arms and pull them off of her, pushing them back until they were behind the chair. She rolled her hips into his again, distracting him further. Then, when his wrists were close enough, she pulled out the handcuffs she had hidden under the cushion of the chair, and very quickly handcuffed his wrists together.

He froze immediately, breaking their kiss. She heard him pull at the handcuffs, probably registering what she had done. He looked at her with confusion. “I’m not opposed to handcuffs, angel, but a little warning would be great.”

Rey didn’t smile. She got off his lap and kneeled down in front of him, pulling the two pairs of ankle cuffs she had taped under the chair, and secured his first leg.

“Rey, what are you doing?” He sounded concerned now.

She cuffed his second leg and stood up. He was secured to the chair, and he was looking at her with only confusion in his eyes. She crossed her arms and glared at him.

Ren adjusted himself, the metal of the cuffs clinking as he did. “Rey,” he said again, his voice was calmer. “What is going on?”

She clenched her teeth. “I think you know the answer to that question.”

Realization slowly came over his face. He cast his eyes to the floor for a moment and swallowed before he brought his gaze back up to meet hers again. If Rey didn’t know any better, she’d swear he looked guilty. “You know,” he said quietly.

“Yes,” she said, pleased with how strong she sounded. “I know.”

“How?” he asked. He didn’t sound demanding. There was hardly any emotion in his voice.

“I don’t see why that matters,” she said. “But I saw your messages from some guy named Hux. When I saw them, I knew.”

He didn’t say anything. He just dropped his gaze to the floor again.

His silence was infuriating. She felt her cheeks warming with frustration. “You’re going to tell me everything you told the K.O.R. about me.” Her voice sounded angry. This was important. She needed to know what Ren had given up about her and the J.C.

He still didn’t look up. “I told Hux about the source you have that’s helped you find me on missions, and I told him about your mission to take out a member of the secret service.”

Rey didn’t say anything for a moment, surprised. “That’s it?” she asked.

He glanced up at her. “You haven’t given me very much to tell him.”

“But you were getting close to the good stuff, weren’t you?” she asked, her voice harsh. “How many more of our little rendezvous did you think it would take for me to give you anything you wanted?”

He was silent.

She wanted to hit him. She turned away from him, feeling tears in her eyes. She tried to fight them back. “So I imagine this started when you happened to run into me at Senator Knight’s party,” she said, moving a few steps away from him. “ And I was stupid enough to go along with your story that you just happened to run into me there. You’ve been playing me since then haven’t you?” She looked over her shoulder at him.

Still, he said nothing.

She could have screamed in frustration. She turned to face him again. “Or have you been spying on me since the first time we met in the alley? Did they send you on that mission just to get my attention? Was there ever a single real moment between us?” She couldn’t fight back the tears anymore.

He looked up at her then. He looked…broken. She had never seen him look like that before. But she could barely bring herself to care.

“Ren, you bastard, I _cared_ about you. I told you things I’ve never told anyone. You actually opened up to me…or was any of that even the truth? Did you make all of it up just to get closer to me? I know how these missions go.” She wasn’t sure if she could stop now. Everything was pouring out. Tears were streaming down her face. “What we had, it meant a lot to me. You were someone I could rely on. I believed that you were—” she wasn’t sure how to finish that sentence. She paused for a moment and took a deep breath. “Ren, I let you _inside of me_. I felt closer to you than I’ve felt to anyone in a long time, and now I don’t know if any of it was even real.”

Her words hung in the air between them. She was done now. She needed him to say something, to offer some kind of explanation.

She watched him take a breath before he spoke. “I don’t deserve your forgiveness.” His voice was sad. “But I will explain myself, if that’s what you want.”

He looked at her, and after a moment, she gave him a small nod.

“You don’t have to believe a word I tell you,” he said. “But I swear, it’s the truth.” He took a deep breath. “I never set out to spy on you. Our first meeting was just a coincidence. As for the meeting at the senator’s house, I still don’t know how that happened, but it did. I did not follow you there. I wasn’t spying on you then either, or after that. This started…” he swallowed before continuing. “It started after we met up in Florida. One of my coworkers, Hux, told me he knew about us. He had bugged my phone and heard our conversation when we agreed to go to Florida.”

Rey sighed as she remembered what phone conversation Ren was referring to.

“When I got back from Florida, Hux confronted me,” Ren continued. “He told me that I could either spy on you, or he’d got to Snoke, our boss, and tell him about us.”

“And why would that be so scary?” Rey said, her voice still harsh. “Is getting fired your worst nightmare?”

Ren shook his head. “Snoke wouldn’t fire me. He’d…do other things, and probably have me killed when he was done with me. And…” Ren glanced up at her. “He’d go after you too.”

Rey was taken aback. “Me?”

“He’d consider you a security risk, even if he knew I didn’t tell you anything. He would have had you killed.”

Rey narrowed her eyes at him. “Say I believed any of that, why didn’t you tell me?”

Ren swallowed. “I knew how it sounded,” he said. “I was…I was scared to lose you, Rey. I was afraid that you’d look at me exactly how you’re looking at me right now.”

Rey felt more tears well up in her eyes. “I asked you,” she said. “I asked you more than once if something was going on, because I knew you were acting different, but you still didn’t tell me.”

“I’m a coward,” he said, and unless she was mistaken, there were tears in his eyes too. “I’m a selfish coward and I deserve your hatred.”

Rey turned away, not wanting to look at him anymore. She covered her face with her hands, the tears flowing faster.

“You don’t have to believe this either, but you deserve to know.” His voice came from behind her. “After I got back from Chicago, I told Hux I was done. I told him that if he told Snoke about you and me, I’d tell Snoke that he had been keeping this from him for weeks. That seemed to scare him off. I just couldn’t keep lying to you, Rey. It was _killing me_.”

Rey tried to keep her sobs silent as she registered his words. She wanted to believe him more than anything.

“I’m sorry, Rey.” Ren’s voice came again, sounding broken and sad. “I know that probably means nothing, but I am _so sorry_.”

Rey felt like she was going to start hyperventilating. She didn’t know if she could take this anymore. “I wish that were enough, Ren.”

She turned then. Her face, she was sure, was red and wet from tears. She was surprised to see tears falling down his cheeks as well. He looked the same as he had looked when he told her he thought he was a monster. After staring at him for a few moments, she put her hand in her pocket, digging out two keys. She walked around him and kneeled behind the chair, undoing the handcuffs. When they were undone, she put the other key in his hand, meant for the ankle cuffs. She stood up and walked towards the door then, picking up her small bag on the way out.

When she opened the door, she glanced over her shoulder. Ren wasn’t taking off the ankle cuffs. He was looking over his shoulder at her, guilt apparent on his face.

“Goodbye, Ben,” she said to him as she closed the door behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am very sorry this chapter took so long. With the holidays and then the new semester, it was hard to find time to write. I hope I didn't let you down with the new chapter after so long a wait.
> 
> Oh, how I love angst. Is Hux right? Is there no happy ending for them? You'll have to wait and see. Let me know what you think.


	14. Mourning

Rey spent the next two weeks trying to fall back into a routine. She went to work, she socialized, she was productive, and she went home. Luke sent her on a mission, a standard sniper mission. She had to push back thoughts of Ren when she scanned the rooftops around her. She got the job done and reported back. Things were going back to the way they should be.

It should have been easy. It should have been easy to go back to normal after ending things with Ren. She had lived most of her life without him; so living without him now should be no different. But despite that, she was finding it increasingly difficult to go back to the way things were. She was starting to realize she had changed. There was no going back. She knew this in her heart, but despite those feelings, she carried on, trying to find some sense of normalcy.

A part of her hated Ren for this, hated him for coming into her life and changing everything, ripping her old life away from her. That part of her wished she had never met him. But the other part of her couldn’t bear that idea, couldn’t bear the idea of erasing the time she had with him. Maybe that made her weak, longing for someone who had stuck a knife in her back and twisted it. When she thought about what he did to her, a rush of hatred always went through her.

Then she thought about what he said to her in the cabin, how he had apologized, and told her that he deserved her hatred. His explanation of why he did it, that this Hux person had made him do it and he was scared of his boss Snoke, sounded reasonable, and the way he looked at her seemed so sincere. But she was scared to believe it, because if she believed it she might forgive him, and if she forgave him…she did not know what would come after that.

She sat at her desk at the J.C. exactly seventeen days after she had left Ren in the cabin. For once, she wasn’t actually thinking about him but instead was filling out the paperwork on the sniper job she had finished a couple of nights prior. She was getting close to done when she heard a knock on her door.

“Come in!” she called.

When the door opened she glanced up from her papers and saw Finn step inside her office. She greeted him with a smile.

“Hi, Finn,” she said.

He returned her smile as he closed the door behind him. “Hi.”

“What’s up?” she asked, placing her pen on the desk and straightening up. “Did you need something?”

“No, don’t need anything,” Finn said, approaching her desk. He didn’t take a seat in either of the chairs. “I just wanted to see about you.”

Rey tilted her head to the side. “How do you mean? I’m finishing up my paperwork from the mission if that’s what you’re asking.”

He shook his head and scanned her face quickly. “That’s not what I mean.” His smile was gone, and he seemed a little uncomfortable. “How are you doing, Rey?”

Rey smiled again, but felt put off by his nervous energy. “I’m fine, Finn. What’s this about? You’re acting strangely.”

Finn reached up and scratched the back of his neck, his eyes turning towards the floor. “You’re sure you’re okay?”

Her smile fell from her face at his words. “Finn, what is it? I don’t understand.”

He sighed and looked up to meet her eyes again. “Rey, you’ve been acting weird for weeks now.”

Rey was taken aback. “ _I’m_ acting weird? Finn, you’re the one who came into my office looking like you’ve just seen a ghost.”

“That’s true,” he admitted. “But that doesn’t change the fact that you’ve been acting weird for weeks.”

“And how have I been acting weird?” Rey demanded.

Finn bit his lip and exhaled before speaking. “You’ve been way more social than usual. Every time there’s a conversation around here, you’re in it. You keep on saying you want to meet up with people outside of work, which you hardly ever did before. You’re even laughing louder than usual, like you’re over compensating.”

Rey scoffed at his remarks. “So what? It’s a crime to hang out with people in the office? Come on, Finn.”

Finn sighed and seemed to think over his next words. “Jessika said she heard you crying in the bathroom.”

Rey’s shoulders deflated at that comment.

“Twice,” he added.

Rey bit her lip and fell back into her chair. She stared at her fingernails, not wanting to meet Finn’s eyes. She felt too embarrassed to look at him. She had escaped to the bathroom to cry a few times over the last few weeks, but she had no idea anyone had heard her.

“I might not have said anything about this, but when Jessika told me that, I got worried,” Finn said, and Rey could hear genuine concern in his voice. “You don’t have to tell me what’s going on. That’s your business. I just wanted to let you know I’m here for you if you need anything.”

Rey didn’t say anything or look up. She just continued to stare at her nails. It was silent for almost a minute before she heard Finn turn around and head for the door, apparently having had enough of this discomfort. Rey gritted her teeth and considered just letting him leave. That would probably be for the best, but still, he had come to her office offering her his help, and Rey so desperately needed to talk to someone. This was the thought that compelled her to say something.

“Finn,” she said when his hand was on the doorknob of her office.

He turned around and looked at her, waiting for her to speak again.

Rey swallowed. “Will you come over to my place tonight? Seven o’clock?”

Finn nodded. “Okay. I’ll see you then.” And he opened the door and left her office.

*****

Rey spent the rest of the day going back and forth about whether it was a good idea to tell Finn what had happened with Ren. She trusted him, and as a former K.O.R. agent, she felt like he would understand more than anyone. But she also didn’t want to put him in a position where he might have to lie for her, or at the very least he’d be keeping something from his superiors. It seemed selfish to tell him. But if she didn’t talk about this with someone, she might very well go insane, and Finn had offered his help, and she so desperately wanted to take it.

After she ate her dinner, she waited anxiously in her living room, flipping through channels and bouncing her leg up and down. She kept looking at the clock under her TV, counting down the minutes until seven.

6:40…6:47…6:52…6:57…7:00

When the clock struck 7:00 she turned around on the couch and looked at the door. No knock came. She told herself it was ridiculous to imagine that he would be there at exactly the right time. No one ever did that. She turned back to the TV and tried to pay attention to whatever episode of The Office this was.

Once it was 7:03 her head felt like it was ready to burst from the stress of it all, and that was when she heard a knock on her door. She just about flew off the couch. First she grabbed the remote and turned off the TV before making her way to the door. When she put her hand on the doorknob, she took a deep breath before opening it.

Finn was standing there, a small smile on his face.

“Hey,” she said. She sounded almost out of breath. “Thanks for coming.” She stood aside and waved him in.

“Of course,” he said as he stepped inside her apartment.

Rey closed the door behind him. “Let’s sit down,” she said, making her way back towards the couch. She really didn’t feel like wasting her time with small talk. She hadn’t been able to talk to anyone about this in over two weeks, and now that she had the opportunity she felt like it was all going to come tumbling out of her.

Finn sat down on the couch where she had previously been sitting and she sat next to him. She took a deep breath a looked at his face. He was looking back at her patiently, waiting for her to say something.

Rey pressed her lips into a hard line before speaking. “I really appreciate you coming. What I wanted to talk about, it couldn’t be said at the office.”

He nodded. “I understand.”

Rey gripped her hands together tightly. “I’m going to tell you something that I would like you to keep between us,” she said quietly.

Finn nodded again and leaned forward ever so slightly.

Rey sighed and closed her eyes for a moment. She was finally going to tell someone. She opened her eyes and looked straight into Finn’s brown ones. “I’ve been seeing a K.O.R. agent.”

Finn’s expression did not change even minutely. He just looked back at her, not saying anything, as if waiting for her to continue.

Rey drew her eyebrows together, confused. “You don’t look surprised.”

His expression did change then. He looked down and pressed his lips together. “I’ve kind of…” he looked back up at her. “Suspected.”

Rey inhaled sharply and her eyes widened. She had not been expecting him to say that and it immediately panicked her. “You—” she started.

He immediately reached over and put his hand over her clasped hands. “No one else suspects!” he said urgently. “It’s just me, I swear. You’re not in any danger.”

Rey scanned his face, looking for any dishonesty, but she knew she would never find that in Finn. He was honest to a fault. If he was telling her that he was the only one who knew, then she believed him.

“How?” she asked him quietly.

He removed his hand from hers. “Your interest in the K.O.R. kind of set me off to something,” he said. “Then, when I gave you information on one of their missions that second time, I could tell you were excited to have it, even though you tried to hide it. Then for a few weeks you seemed happier then usual, but that changed about two weeks ago. You were acting happy, but that was just it, you were _acting_. Then when Jessika told me she heard you crying I suspected my hunch had been right.”

Rey looked down. Of course he’d been able to figure it out. They’d been trained to notice things like this, and Finn was her close friend. It was only natural that he’d pick up on her behaviors.

“So…” Finn spoke again, his voice kind. “It ended badly?”

Rey bit her lip before nodding slowly.

Finn reached over and put his hand on her shoulder, a comforting gesture. “I’m sorry.”

Rey felt a tear escape her eye and she quickly reached up to brush it away. “He was using me for information.” Her voice sounded shaky.

Finn inhaled sharply. He had a hard time imagining how anyone could use Rey for information. She was one of the best agents they had.

“Don’t worry,” she said. “I didn’t give him anything too important. But…there is something you should know.” This was what she was most worried about telling him.

“What is it?” he asked.

Rey looked up to meet his eyes again, scared about the impact of her words. “I did tell him I had a source that told me how to find him on missions, meaning you. But I didn’t tell him anything about you I _swear_!”

Finn swallowed. That wasn’t something he wanted to hear. His time in the K.O.R. had been difficult, and he preferred not to think about it if he could. He also hated the idea of coming up on the K.O.R.’s radar in any way. He knew that if they ever got their hands on him, they wouldn’t kill him, but do far worse.

“I’m so sorry, Finn,” Rey said, breaking him from his thoughts. She sounded miserable. “I’m an complete idiot for trusting him. I’m sorry.”

“You’re not an idiot,” he said. He wasn’t happy about what she had said about him, but he also knew she was sorry, and that getting angry with her would accomplish nothing. “You screwed up, but he’s the one who used you. I’m not angry with you, Rey.”

More tears escaped her eyes but this time she let them fall. She was relieved to hear him say that. She was worried that the moment he found out when she told Ren, he’d be out the door, calling the J.C., reporting her and never speaking to her again.

“Did you tell him anything else?” he asked. Though he was trying to be supportive, he also wanted to know if she gave up anything vital.

“He knew about one of my missions and reported it,” she said. “That’s it.”

Finn nodded and squeezed her shoulder, trying to be of help.

Rey brought her hand to her forehead and Finn could see more tears coming down her cheeks. “I just wish none of this had happened.”

“I know, Rey,” Finn said quietly, rubbing her back. “I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve this.”

Rey sniffled, rubbing her eyes as she tried to control her breathing.

“You cared about him a lot, huh?” he asked.

She couldn’t seem to bring herself to speak an answer to that, so she just nodded.

Finn thought about asking something else but he realized she needed a few minutes to cry. He knew this was probably the first time she had told anyone about this, the first time she had really been able to talk through it, and that made the whole thing all the more difficult. So he sat next to her, rubbing her back, and let her cry. That continued for a few minutes before she brought her head back up and looked at him.

“I’m sorry…” she said in a broken voice.

“Stop apologizing,” he said, soft but firm. “You don’t need to apologize.”

“I should have known better,” she said, her voice breaking. “I should have known better than to get involved with him.”

“Maybe,” Finn said, seeing no reason to lie to her. “But that doesn’t mean you deserve what happened.”

Rey wiped a few more of her tears away and looked at him closely. “Thank you, Finn.”

He gave her a smile that he hoped looked comforting. “Of course, Rey.”

Rey leaned back on the couch and Finn took his hand off her back. He still had a few questions about all of this. Though he had suspected this was going on for a while, having it confirmed was something else. It was a big deal. If any of their superiors found out, Rey would be thrown out of the J.C. in a heartbeat.

“Do you…” Finn started.

Rey looked at him again.

He cleared his throat. “Do you mind me asking how you found out he was using you?”

She sighed and looked down at her hands. “I saw messages on his phone,” she said quietly. “That’s how I found out.”

Finn swallowed. “That must have been hard.”

She nodded. “I confronted him about it a couple of weeks ago. I set a trap for him and made him tell me everything.”

Finn raised his eyebrows, surprised. “And?” he asked. “How did that go?”

Rey licked her lips. “He told me he was forced to do it by one of his fellow agents and that if he didn’t do it, the agent would have gone to their boss, Snoke.”

Finn practically gasped when he heard the name and Rey turned on him sharply at the sound.

“Snoke?” she said. “Was he your boss when…you were there?”

He looked at the floor. He was not fond of reminiscing about his time with the K.O.R. Some things were better forgotten. Rey just saying Snoke’s name stirred up all kinds of fear inside him.

“Yeah…” Finn answered her. “He was.”

Finn saw her nod out of the corner of his eye. “You don’t have to say anything else about him if you don’t want to.”

“Let’s just say,” he said. “I hope he never finds out about you and one of his agents. He would come after you. I’m sure of that.”

“That’s what Ren said.”

Finn looked back up at her. “Ren?” he asked. “You called him Ren? Like Knights of Ren?”

Rey shrugged. “Yeah, that’s what I usually called him. His call name was Kylo Ren.” She didn’t really care that she was giving him up, not after everything that happened.

Finn’s mouth dropped open and he leaned back on the couch. He brought his hand up and ran it through his hair.

Rey drew her eyebrows together and studied him. “Finn, what is it?”

“It’s just…” He sighed. “I knew him.”

She raised her eyebrows. It shouldn’t surprise her much that Finn knew Ren since Finn had worked for the K.O.R., but the way Finn said that, it seemed like Ren wasn’t just someone he ran into at the office sometimes.

“Were you…friends?” she asked cautiously.

Finn shook his head. “I wouldn’t say that,” he said. “But I knew him. I sometimes got the impression that he hated it there more than I did.”

Rey was taken aback. “What makes you say that?”

“Snoke freaked him out. He freaked us all out, but Ren seemed particularly scared of him. I wondered a few times if Snoke was holding something over him, because I didn’t know why else he would be there.” Finn clasped his hands together. “He also didn’t get along with a lot of the other agents. I remember him and this guy, Hux, they just hated each other—”

“Did you say Hux?” Rey interrupted.

Finn nodded.

“Hux was the one Ren told me was making him use me for information.”

“I’m not surprised,” he said. “That seems right up Hux’s alley. He always was a snake. He would do anything to get ahead.”

“So you think that was true?” Rey asked. “That this Hux guy was making Ren do this?”

Finn shrugged. “I don’t know, Rey,” he said and scanned her face. “But I think you’re asking me because you want to believe that’s the truth.”

Rey looked away from him. She knew that what he was saying was true. She wanted to believe what Ren had told her. She was still so angry with him, but she missed him so desperately that his claims that he had been made to spy on her were so tempting to believe. Maybe it was silly to hope those claims were true, but still, she remembered the moments they had shared in their time together, and she found it harder and harder to believe that those moments were faked.

“Maybe I am,” she said. “Maybe I miss him.”

Finn gave her a small smile. “It was good?” he asked. “The time you were together?”

Rey’s mouth quirked up ever so slightly. “It was,” she answered. “What we had…. I had never experienced anything like that before.”

“Do you love him?”

Rey inhaled sharply. She had been so consumed by anger at Ren for the last few weeks. She had never stopped to consider whether she _loved_ him. That would present a whole new set of problems. She had never even been in love before. Her past relationships had been fine for what they were, but love? Never even close. How was she supposed to know if she was in love? In the movies it was always described as getting butterflies around the other person, and goose bumps. You want to be around them all the time. Rey thought back to her time with Ren. Their ride on his motorcycle in New Orleans. Their breakfast in that seaside diner. Their time in Chicago when he was so gentle with her. All of these memories filled her with something she had never felt before. Was that love?

“I don’t know,” she answered him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sure everyone's forgotten about this fic by now since it took me so long but here's an update if anyone out there still remembers this.


	15. Compromised

Ren watched as Robert Fletcher locked the front door of his house and walked towards his car. Once again, Fletcher was leaving at an odd time of night with his wife and kids fast asleep. It was past midnight, and he was entering the front seat of his car and starting the engine. Ren didn’t start the engine of his own rental car. Rather, he ducked a bit, making sure Fletcher wouldn’t be able to spot him, and waited until Fletcher had pulled out of his driveway before he put the key in the ignition. When Fletcher had turned the corner out of the neighborhood, Ren turned the key and started the engine. He needed to keep his distance from Fletcher. The last thing he wanted was for him to realize he was being followed. He turned the same corner and saw Fletcher’s car further ahead. Staying a safe distance away, he followed him.

This was his third time tailing Fletcher, but he still had nothing concrete to report, only suspicious activity, which wasn’t enough for their client. Fletcher was a war hero turned senator. He had been captured and held prisoner for months in Iraq. When he was finally rescued he rode the publicity all the way to the senate. For a while, he had been lauded as a great American, but then the rumors started. Rumors that he had been turned when he was a prisoner of war and was their man on the inside. These rumors had not been leaked to the media yet. They were kept under wraps in Washington. So now Ren was following his car in the dead of night, looking for evidence that he had turned. He had never had a mission quite like this before. He had followed plenty of dangerous men, but never a suspected terrorist, and never more than twice. This was an unusual mission for the K.O.R., which was precisely why Snoke wanted him on it.

Ren made sure to keep at least one car between him and Fletcher at all times as he followed him through the streets. If he stayed right behind him, he might eventually notice he was being followed. The last two times he had followed Fletcher, he went to two different locations, and met with a few men that Ren did not recognize. He had looked into them and recognized none of them as fellow senators, congressmen, or government officials. Ren could already tell they were going to yet another different location. It was smart not to go to the same place each time, especially if he was up to no good.

When Ren turned a corner to a street that Fletcher had just gone down, he paused when he saw that Fletcher had parked his car. Ren scanned the area. There were three men standing across the street from where Fletcher was parked. They were standing in front of a church. Fletcher got out of his car and approached the men. They greeted him with handshakes and pats on the back. Ren waited, not wanting to approach them. They exchanged words for a minute or two before they headed up the steps of the church, opened the door, and entered. They closed the door behind them and the street was left empty. After waiting another minute to see if they would come back out, Ren drove his car further down the street. Not too close to where Fletcher had parked his car, but close enough that he would be able to get a good look at them when they left the church. He pulled the key out of the ignition.

A church was an odd choice, but he supposed there was little chance of being interrupted in a church in the middle of the night. It also looked innocent. Who would expect any plotting going on in there?

Ren settled in. This was probably going to be a while. When they came out of the church, he was going to attempt to take a picture of at least one of them so he could run it through facial recognition. Those were Snoke’s orders. These stakeouts were pointless if he couldn’t get any dirt on Fletcher.

As it usually did on these missions, his mind started to wander, and every time his mind wandered, he ended up thinking of Rey. The last couple of weeks had been torturous. Every time he thought of her he remembered the way she looked at him when he was handcuffed in that cabin, the look of betrayal on her face. He hated himself for making her feel that way. Hated himself for lying to her. He deserved everything she had said to him. Hell, he deserved worse. He had told her the truth about why he had done it and he hoped she had believed him, but it didn’t matter. He had still lied. He could have come clean earlier but he didn’t, and for that, he deserved her rejection.

What did he think would happen? That she’d never find out? That was idiotic of him. She had been suspicious of his behavior for a while. The last few times they had been together she seemed to realize that he was behaving strangely. The truth was, when she confronted him in the cabin, he hadn’t been all that surprised. He had only wished none of it had happened, that he never lied to her and betrayed her. Now he would never see her again. She had probably already moved on.

Hux had kept his mouth shut about what happened. Ren figured he was truly scared of what Snoke might do to him if he knew he was keeping secrets. And now that it was over between him and Rey, he figured he never had to worry about that himself, which was a weight off his shoulders, even if he still felt broken over losing Rey. Hell, Hux had even been avoiding him since they had their confrontation. That was a gift.

But not having to put up with Hux did little to help him overall. He was isolating himself from the rest of the K.O.R. Usually he at least made an effort to talk to other agents. He and Phasma were friendly. But ever since Rey, he had barely talked to anyone, only talking to them if it was necessary for a mission. He talked to Snoke, of course, but that wasn’t optional. He knew it was probably a bad idea to cut himself off from everyone, but he was having a difficult time caring. He didn’t want to be around anyone, and he knew he was dabbling in self destructive behavior.

The night after Rey ended things with him, he found himself in a bar, throwing back far too many and looking for trouble. When some big drunken guy bumped into him from behind he saw his chance.

_Ren whirled around on his stool hopped off, shoving the guy who had bumped into him hard. “Watch where you’re going,” he snarled at him._

_The guy stumbled back a few paces and looked at him in shock, but his expression quickly switched to anger. “You got a problem?”_

_“Are you deaf? I told you to watch where you’re going.” Ren knew he was blowing this way out of proportion, but he didn’t care. He wanted to fight._

_The guy charged forward and threw a punch at him. Ren ducked under his arm and watched as he ran into his stool. The man turned on him again, furious, and ran at him full speed._

_Ren didn’t avoid him this time. The man hit him hard and he was backed into the pool table in the middle of the bar. People were starting to gather around them now. When he was trapped against the table, the man punched him in the mouth. Ren tasted blood. He still didn’t move as the man landed another punch against his jaw. Then he punched him in the gut. Ren did fight back then, shoving his knee up and hitting him in the crotch. The man doubled over, falling to the floor. Ren was immediately on him, hitting him again and again._

_Someone grabbed his jacket then, hauling him off the man. Ren looked around to see the bartender._

_“If you don’t stop this nonsense now, I’m calling the cops,” the bartender yelled at him. “Now get out, both of you.”_

_Ren knew better than to argue. He couldn’t afford to get arrested. That was one of Snoke’s top rules. He had to keep his record squeaky clean._

Since that night Ren had avoided getting into trouble, but he had been drowning his sorrows in plenty of alcohol. He hadn’t realized how important Rey had become to him. Losing her should not be this difficult, he had plenty of failed relationships before this one, but he had become too attached to her. He didn’t know what to make of it, or what he was supposed to do about it now. He couldn’t get her back. She would never have him. Trying to forget about her was certainly not working. So what did that leave?

He needed a cigarette. Thinking about Rey so much made his head hurt. He looked to make sure no one was coming out of the church and rolled down his window. He took a cigarette out of its box and lit it up, taking a deep drag. Rey had told him once that he shouldn’t smoke, but lately he had been smoking even more than usual.

As he had done so many times in the last few weeks, Ren took out his phone and scrolled through his contacts. When he came to Rey’s name, he stopped. He desperately wished he could call her; hear her voice, even if she just yelled at him.

“Can I help you, sir?” a voice from right next to him startled Ren out of his thoughts. He almost jumped in his seat but he managed not to appear calm. He looked out his open window and saw a man standing there, crouched a little bit so he could see into his car.

“No, thank you,” Ren said, his voice calm, but in his head he was beating himself up for letting someone sneak up on him. He had been so distracted by thoughts of Rey; he wasn’t even checking his area as he was supposed to do.

The man smiled at him. “Do you mind me asking what you’re doing here at one o’clock in the morning?”

Ren was a little suspicious. Most people wouldn’t just stop and ask questions like this unless he was parked in front of their house. But this wasn’t a neighborhood. There were no houses on the street. There were a couple office buildings and the church that Fletcher and the men had gone into. So who was this man? Ren didn’t recognize him from any of Fletcher’s previous meetings.

“I was on my way home,” Ren said slowly. “I stopped for a smoke.” He looked pointedly at his cigarette, which he was still holding out the window.

The man glanced at his cigarette and looked back at his face. He studied him for a moment before nodding, seemingly satisfied. “You have yourself a nice night then.”

Ren returned his nod. “You too.”

The man walked away and Ren watched him go until he turned the corner down the street. He flicked his cigarette onto the ground and rolled up his window. Ren wasn’t sure what had just happened, but it was possible he had just been compromised. That man could have been working with Fletcher, and if that was the case, he couldn’t stay. The man might come back, and if Ren were still there, he’d know he was up to something.

Cursing under his breath, Ren put the key into the ignition and drove away from the church. He had let his thoughts of Rey distract him from his mission, and now there would be consequences.

*****

Ren walked into headquarters the next day knowing he was going to have a hell of a time. Snoke wanted him to report on the mission immediately, so Ren just headed straight for his office, not bothering to stop at his own.

“Hey, Ren,” Phasma said to him as he approached her. “How’d last night go?”

“The mission might be yours after I talk to Snoke,” Ren said as he passed her.

He caught sight of her surprised expression but kept walking. Ren wasn’t usually one to screw up a mission. The only exception being when Rey had pickpocketed him and stolen the information he was meant to receive. Snoke had reamed him out over that incident, but other than that, his record was nearly perfect.

Hux glared at him as usual when he passed him, but Ren paid him no mind. His eyes were on the door to Snoke’s office. He had been mentally preparing himself for this all night. When he finally reached the door, he hesitated before finally knocking.

“Come in.” Snoke’s voice came from inside.

Ren bit his lip before turning the doorknob and stepping inside.

Snoke was at his desk writing something down. He looked sharp as ever in his suit and tie. He dressed to the nines every day. His shaved head and pale skin giving him an even harsher look. He looked up when Ren shut the door behind him. His pale blue eyes pierced him, making him want to back up a step.

“Good,” Snoke said. “You’re here.” He set his pen down on his desk and leaned back in his chair. “Tell me about Fletcher. Did you get the photographs?”

Ren swallowed and took a breath. “No,” he said. “There was a complication.”

Snoke raised his pale eyebrows, and Ren could already see a glint of anger in his eyes. “What do you mean a ‘complication’?”

Ren swallowed again and tried desperately to keep his voice from shaking. Then he told Snoke what happened, about the man who had come up to his car window and asked him what he was doing. He relayed the entire conversation to him, and told him that he believed whoever it was had known he was up to something. When he was done, he held his breath, waiting for Snoke’s response, knowing it would not be good.

Snoke’s jaw was clenched. He sat there staring at Ren for a few moments before standing up and circling around his desk so he was standing in front of it. “What’s happened to you, Kylo Ren?”

Ren desperately wanted to leave the room. “I…I’m sorry. It won’t happen again—”

“You let an enemy agent steal from you,” Snoke said, ignoring his words. “Now you compromised yourself on a high stakes mission. And don’t think I haven’t noticed how differently you’ve been behaving lately.”

Ren flinched. He didn’t realize Snoke knew something was off.

“So I ask again,” Snoke said, stepping closer to him. “What’s happened to you?”

“Nothing, sir,” Ren said. His voice sounded breathless in his own ears. He was always capable of masking his emotions, but Snoke had a way off putting him off his game. “Nothing’s happened.”

Snoke was standing right in front of him now, his eyes scanning his face up and down. “You compromised yourself on this mission?”

“Yes,” Ren got out. He was staring down, not wanting to make eye contact with him.

“You neglected to mention how that happened.” Snoke’s voice was harsh.

Ren’s fingernails were digging into his palms. “I was distracted.”

He had barely gotten the last word out of his mouth when he felt Snoke’s fist make contact with his jaw. Ren knew it was coming, but he still lost his balance. He was able to stay on his feet but he stumbled to the side a few steps.

“Get back over here.” Snoke’s voice was angrier than before.

Ren quickly moved to stand in front of him again, trying to ignore the stinging pain in his jaw.

Snoke grabbed his face in one hand. His fingers pressing into his cheeks as he forced him to look at him. “ _Distracted_?” he hissed in his face. “I send you on one of the highest stakes missions we’ve ever had and you tell me you got _distracted_?”

“Yes, sir,” Ren managed to say. “I’m sorry, sir.”

“This is the second time you’ve failed a mission,” Snoke said darkly. “Is there a reason for that? Do I need to start questioning your loyalty?”

“No!” Ren said immediately. The thought of Snoke thinking he wasn’t loyal was terrifying. He’d get much worse than a punch in the jaw if that were the case. “No, sir. You know I’d never betray you.”

“Have you forgotten what I’ve done for you, boy? Everything I’ve given you?” Snoke snarled at him.

“I haven’t!” Ren said, and he meant it. He briefly remembered what had happened when Snoke first came across him, but immediately pushed that memory back down.

Snoke took his hand away from his face. “I sure hope that’s the truth, because you know as well as I do that you have nowhere else to go.”

Ren let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as Snoke stepped back from him. He kept his mouth shut. The last thing he wanted was to set him off again.

Snoke walked back around his desk and sat down in his chair again. He looked composed, as if he hadn’t just punched out one of his agents. It was his calmness that scared Ren the most.

“I want you to leave,” Snoke said as he picked his pen back up to finish whatever he was working on. “Go home. I don’t want to see you for the rest of the day.”

Ren felt all too eager to comply. He immediately headed towards the door, trying to keep himself from sprinting out of the room.

“And Ren?” Snoke said when his hand was on the doorknob.

Ren glanced back over his shoulder at him.

Snoke paused for a moment before saying. “Don’t fail me again.”

Ren nodded and opened the door. He stepped out and closed the door behind him. Relief washed over his body immediately. A couple of agents nearby looked at him. Obviously some of them had heard his encounter with Snoke. He didn’t spare them a glance, just headed towards the elevator to put as much distance between him and Snoke as possible.

*****

That night Ren was sprawled on his couch watching TV. He had a glass of bourbon next to him on the table and an icepack on his jaw. Snoke had really done a number on him.

Phasma had called him earlier to ask him what had happened. Rumors were swirling around the office that he messed up big time. He didn’t go into details with her but he told her he screwed up. He asked her if the mission had been given to her. They were the best agents in the K.O.R. so they always got the most difficult missions. But she told him it hadn’t been given to her. Apparently it was still his, for now.

He was still beating himself up for failing his mission. Getting distracted on missions was for rookie agents. He had been at this for years and this was the first time he had been compromised like that. It was humiliating. If only he could get Rey out of his head, he could just go back to normal. Run his missions for Snoke without any wrench being thrown into them, and everything would be the same as it was before Rey had cannoned into his life. But that didn’t seem to be possible for him.

Some girl on Say Yes to the Dress was about to pick a dress that made her waist look way wider than it was.

“Come on, Sarah,” Ren said against his ice pack. “You can do better than that.”

His phone rang then. Ren glanced at the table where it sat. He figured it was Phasma again. Maybe she had been given the mission. He picked his phone off the table and looked at the caller ID. When he saw who it was, he dropped his icepack on his lap and immediately pressed ‘answer.”

“Rey?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh look, another chapter. Am I writing regularly? Let's try not to jinx it, okay? Hope you enjoy.
> 
> And did you guys see the latest TLJ trailer? Maybe that's what inspired me to write more.


	16. Penalty

Rey knew she was probably making a mistake the moment she stepped into Teddy’s, a bar she occasionally frequented. But when she walked by, the temptation of a Jameson was too great for her to ignore. It had been three days since she had confessed everything to Finn, and things had not gotten any easier. She was relieved that somebody knew. There was comfort in knowing that Finn would be there for her and that he would never tell anyone. But confiding in Finn could not fix the whirlwind of feelings she was having about Ren. One moment she felt that she could forgive him, the next she was furious and never wanted to see his face again. It was all too confusing.

She had gone out for a walk that night to try to clear her head. What Finn had told her only confused her more. According to Finn, Ren wasn’t happy with the K.O.R. Rey had gotten that impression from him before, but the way Finn told it, it was like he was there against his will. As if he couldn’t leave if he wanted to. What did that mean?

_What does it matter? You’ll never see him again._

But if what Ren told her was true, and he really was afraid of what Snoke might do to both of them, doesn’t that change things?

_No. He lied to you. He betrayed you._

He did lie to her. He did betray her. The thought of what he did still infuriated her. But she knew that it didn’t change how she felt about him. Despite what he had done, she still cared for Ren, and she knew for a fact that he cared for her too. The emotion he had shown with her, it was real. For that reason, she couldn’t help but want to get him away from the K.O.R. if he really did hate it like Finn seemed to think he did. Based on the little information Finn had shared with her over the course of their friendship about the K.O.R., she had some idea of what the agency was like, and none of it sounded good.

Speculating on whether she could get Ren away from the K.O.R. was pointless. They weren’t seeing each other anymore, and even if they were, she doubted she could get him to listen to her about leaving them. The one time it had come up, when they had their fight in the D.C. hotel room, he had resisted any suggestion of walking away from the K.O.R. He was obviously tied to them, and she doubted she could sever that. There were too many ‘what ifs?’ in this scenario for it to ever play out the way she wanted.

All of these thoughts were bouncing around her head when she approached the bar counter and ordered a Jameson from the bartender. The bar wasn’t too crowded for a Friday night. There were a few people occupying the tables and a few playing pool in the back of the room. She sat down on a bar stool and waited for her drink. She didn’t come here too often, but enough to know the menu and recognize some regulars.

The bartender, she was pretty sure his name was Mike, returned with her Jameson and set it down in front of her with a smile. She thanked him and immediately brought the drink to her lips. It was strong, which was what she wanted. She felt herself relax after just one sip. The taste of something familiar sometimes worked wonders.

She thought back on when Ren had found her in that bar in Texas after she had taken out those drug traders. They had a drink together and he asked her about her drinking habits. The question was oddly personal. She hadn’t known what to say. She usually didn’t drink much, but in the last couple of weeks, she had been drinking a little more than usual. She supposed that was a pretty normal reaction to heartbreak.

Rey downed the rest of her Jameson in less than ten seconds and signaled to Mike that she wanted another. He raised his eyebrows at her, seemingly surprised that she had finished her first one so quickly. He took her glass out of her hand and turned back to the drinks along the wall. He turned back after a few seconds with her glass filled back up and handed it to her.

As Rey sipped from her second glass, he thoughts continued to focus on Ren. Though they were thoughts to a different nature now that the alcohol was doing his job. She still thought about getting him away from the K.O.R. She fantasized about bringing him over to the J.C. and working with him. After all, if Finn could do it, why couldn’t he? But these were silly fantasies that could never come to fruition.

But as the alcohol worked its way through her, Rey thought about how much she missed going to bed with Ren. It had only been a few weeks since they’d last slept together in Chicago. When he had been so gentle with her and she had kept her eyes locked on his the entire time. They came together. That had never happened to her before with any man. It had been one of the most erotic moments of her life.

She doubted she’d be able to find anyone else who could pleasure her in the way Ren had, and that frustrated her to no end. Ren barely had to touch her to make her wet, and when he did touch her, her body sang in response. Over the last few weeks, she had tried touching herself a few times when she was lonely, and had only been successful once. She had touched herself, pretending it was Ren’s hands on her and not her own, and tried to think about their many times together, how he had gently made love to her, or taken her hard against the wall. She rubbed herself to these thoughts and came shouting his name. She felt ashamed afterwards. Ashamed that he still held this power over her and that she could not shake him off.

Rey was finished with her second glass now and once again signaled to Mike that she wanted another. He quickly took her glass and refilled it.

The alcohol was starting to take effect. Rey realized this when she giggled in response to Mike’s smile as he set her drink down in front of her. She probably shouldn’t be getting drunk by herself, but it wasn’t like she was in an unfamiliar place and her apartment wasn’t too far of a walk.

Rey thought of when she had sipped from Ren’s drink when they were at Senator Knight’s gala a few months ago. He had really pissed her off that night, and it still filled her with glee when she remembered how she pick pocketed him without him suspecting a thing.

_You stole from him. He lied to you._

That was what she was angriest about, she knew. That he had lied. He turned over information about her to the K.O.R., but if he had come clean about it, she would have forgiven him. She would have been angry, but if he had explained, she would have understood. Maybe they could have figured out a way out of it together, but no. He chose not to tell her the truth. He deceived her. And no evil boss of his could make that okay.

Rey pulled out her cell phone before she realized what she was doing. She was mad, and not thinking very clearly. When she pulled up her contacts on her phone she had the intention of deleting Ren’s phone number from her life forever. Seeing his name on there was a constant reminder of him, and his lies, and she wanted it gone. If she deleted his number, maybe she could delete him from her mind, and from existence.

When she came to Ren’s name’s in her contacts, her thumb hovered over the ‘delete’ button for a few moments before she made a snap decision and pressed ‘call’ instead. She was pissed and wanted to give him a piece of her mind. This would be the last time she spoke to him. Then she’d delete his number from her phone and never think about him again.

The phone rang once and she wondered if this was a bad idea. Second ring. Anticipation hit her as she realized she might hear his voice again for the first time since she left him in the cabin. Third ring. _This is a mistake I should hang up—_

“Rey?” Ren’s voice came from the other line.

Rey immediately tried to ignore the butterflies she felt in her stomach at the sound of his voice. He sounded surprised and a little tired. Had she woken him up?

_Who cares? You called to tell him off._

“Yeahh, it’s me,” she said and winced at the sound of her slurring. She must be a little drunker than she thought. “I’m ah, calling to tell you that…you’re a bastard for lying to me aaand I’m never talking to you again.”

There was a long pause, and Rey briefly wondered if he had hung up.

“You called just to tell me that?” Ren broke the silence. “That you’re never gonna talk to me again?”

“Wellll…yeah.” Rey realized that this plan hadn’t made much sense, but her drunken mind wasn’t looking for sense. She had acted on impulse. But she did have more to say. “You did not have to lieee to me, you know that? But you did and that’s…s’what ruined—”

“Rey, are you drunk?” Ren cut her off.

“What does that matter?” Rey said indigently. “Now you listen—”

“Where are you?” he asked. He sounded worried now. “You’re not alone, are you?”

“Yeah…I’m at a bar.” She was getting frustrated at his interruptions. She was supposed to be telling me off. “You’re not listening to me. I called to—”

“Which bar?” Ren asked, his voice insistent.

“It’s called Teddy’s!” If he would stop interrupting her she could do what she called him to do in the first place. “Now I’m talking. You ruined what we had, Ren. I hope y’know that.”

“I do,” he answered immediately. There was guilt in his voice.

“Good,” she said, but a part of her wanted to tell him she forgave him and make amends. “It coulda worked out if you told me, but ya lied.”

“I know,” he said.

Rey wasn’t sure what to say when he was being so agreeable. She had imagined they would yell at each other on the phone, but this was not the case.

“Well…goodbye then,” she said. “I’m deleting you from my phone now.”

She hung up when the last word escaped her mouth, not wanting to hear his answer. If he asked her to forgive him, she had a feeling she would do it in a heartbeat. She picked her drink up off the counter and downed the rest of it. For the fourth time, she signaled to Mike that she wanted another drink. He looked at her uneasily this time.

“You sure about that?” he asked. “I don’t know if that’s the best idea.”

“Another,” Rey said, trying to sound as sober as she could.

Mike shrugged. “Okay, but I’m cutting you off after this.”

Rey glared at him. She didn’t want to be cut off even though a part of her knew that was probably for the best. He refilled her glass and placed it in front of her again. She took a few sips from her drink and glanced around the bar. She would walk home after she finished this glass.

_Forgetting something?_

Oh right. She was going to delete Ren’s number from her phone, and hopefully in doing so, delete him from existence. It was best if she didn’t have the option to contact him anymore. She might do something stupid like call him when she’s drinking alone in a bar.

She pulled up his number on her phone contacts again, and once again her finger hovered over the ‘delete’ button. She stared at his name on her phone and back at ‘delete.” This should be easy, to delete someone who had lied to her. So why was she hesitating?

Rey was suddenly yanked from her thoughts when she felt a hand trailing over her backside. She swung around and saw one of the guys she had seen earlier playing pool. He had obviously had a few too many as well.

“Excuse me,” Rey said in the clearest voice possible, though she knew she sounded faded. “Keep your hands to yourself.”

“I’m sorry, darlin’,” the man said. He was leaning in too close for comfort. “You’re just so pretty.”

When the man reached around to try and grab her again, Rey took hold of his wrist and bent it backwards. He immediately shouted out in pain and tried to pull his hand back. She may have been drunk, but she was still coherent enough to do this.

“Now, I could break your wrist, or I could let you go, which would’ya you prefer?” she asked him, tightening her grip on his wrist.

“Let me go, please!” the man cried out. “I’m sorry!”

“Ya better be,” she said harshly, but she loosened her grip and looked him in the eye. “Don’t let me catch you around here again,” she told him, and then she let him go.

The man fell backwards a few steps. He looked shocked. Then he immediately headed towards the exit.

Rey turned back to her drink to take another sip.

“That was impressive,” came an all too familiar voice from next to her.

Rey froze. She knew who it was, but she didn’t think it was possible. How could he be here? She slowly looked to the side and there Ren was, standing next to a stool a few feet away from her at the bar. He must have come in while she was dealing with the drunk. She hadn’t even noticed him.

She put her drink down and continued to stare. The butterflies were back in her belly. He was standing right there. She had thought about him so much in the last few weeks and seeing him felt like it breathed new life into her. “How’re you here?”

Ren took a step closer to her. “You told me which bar you were at, remember?”

Rey tried to replay her conversation with Ren in her mind, but she was drawing a blank. Her memory was a jumbled mess right now. Though she supposed she had to have told him where she was, because he was here.

“You…you live in D.C.?” she asked him. That was what really got to her. He was there, which meant he lived nearby, which meant they lived in the same city. They lived in the same city and she didn’t even know it.

Ren nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “You didn’t suspect? A lot of people…in our line of work live here.”

Rey narrowed her eyes. She had never really thought about where Ren might live. She certainly never considered that he would live so close to her. The idea was bizarre, yet it seemed to be the case.

“Well…this was fun,” Rey said and stood up from her stool. She downed the rest of her drink and dug through her pockets for two twenty dollar bills and laid them next to her empty glass. She turned back to Ren. “But I was just leaving.”

She walked toward the exit, but she didn’t realize what a challenge walking was going to be. This was the first time since she had come into the bar she had walked anywhere and she knew immediately that it was going to be a challenge. The room was already spinning. She managed to make it to the door and pushed it open, but when she glanced over her shoulder she saw that Ren was right behind her.

They walked out of the bar together and Ren said, “Rey, you can’t drive.”

“Don’t gotta,” she said, and her voice sounded drunken in her own ears. “I’ll walk.”

“Rey, you could barely get out of the bar.” His voice sounded worried. “How are you going to walk home?”

“I’ll be fine,” she said slowly and she turned to face him. “I don’t need _your_ help.” She jabbed her finger in the middle of his chest for emphasis. She tried to ignore how excited she felt about being near him again.

“Rey, please…” He reached out and took hold of her shoulders, trying to steady her. She was starting to sway from side to side.

“No, no. I don’t—” Rey felt it coming then, and she was mortified. She wrenched herself away from Ren and practically leaped over to the bushes next to the bar exit and unloaded her stomach into the bushes. It had been a while since she had puked, and the sensation was always overwhelming. Once she had finished her first wretch, she felt another one coming up and bent over again.

She felt a hand in her hair and when she glanced up she saw that Ren was pulling her hair out of her face. He was looking at her with concern. She thought about shoving him away from her but before she could do anything she puked into the bushes again. She wasn’t sure how many times she puked, but Ren stood there with her until she was done, holding her hair out of her face.

When she was finally done, she stood up straight and Ren let go of her hair. She still felt dizzy, but she made to move past Ren. “I’m goin’ home,” she said, brushing past him.

Ren was immediately next to her. “I’ll walk with you.”

“No!” She turned on him then, but she was having a hard time focusing on his face. Walk home with him? Then he would know where she lived, and she couldn’t have that. “You don’t—I don’t want…” She was having trouble forming a coherent thought, and before she knew it, she was falling forward into his chest.

Ren caught her, his arms circling around her. “Can you stand?” he said into her hair.

Rey nodded and tried to straighten herself, but the moment she did she fell into him again. Every time she opened her eyes she saw three Rens in front of her, and her legs felt like jelly. She clutched Ren’s leather jacket and tried to steady herself. She tried not to think about how she was in his arms again, or his familiar scent.

“You’re okay,” he whispered. “I got you.” He leaned down then and put his hand under her legs and swooped her up into his arms.

“Hey!” she tried to protest.

“Well, can you walk or can’t you?” he asked her. His voice wasn’t harsh, but insistent.

Rey huffed and leaned her head into his shoulder, knowing he was right. This was what she got for drinking so much by herself. She doubted she’d be able to walk more than a few steps without falling over, and she felt exhausted.

Ren walked with her in his arms to the parking lot behind the bar. She saw his motorcycle parked there and she felt uneasy at the sight of it. The idea of getting on his motorcycle while she was as drunk as she was did not seem pleasant. When they reached his motorcycle Ren placed her on the seat and reached for the helmet hooked on the side. He held it out to her and she tentatively took it in her hands. She stared at it for a moment before glancing up at him.

“Could you…?” She honestly wasn’t sure she’d be able to put it on properly in her current state.

Ren took the helmet back and put it on her. Once he secured the buckle under her chin, he looked at her.

“Where do you live? I’ll take you home.”

Rey shook her head at him. As tired and drunk as she was, she still knew she didn’t want him to know where she lived.

“Fine,” he said and grabbed his own helmet. He put it on and swung his leg over his motorcycle, settling in. “I’ll go slow,” he said over his shoulder. “But you should hold on.”

Rey still felt nervous about being on the motorcycle, but she put her arms around him anyway and held on.

Ren ignited the engine and took off.

*****

Ren wasn’t usually one to go slow on his motorcycle, but with Rey in her current condition, he went about as slow as he could without pissing off other drivers. He didn’t want to risk her flying off. Motorcycles weren’t exactly meant for transporting people who are less than sober.

His apartment wasn’t far, and by the time he reached his place he let out a breath in relief. He turned off the engine and took his helmet off. Rey was still holding onto him, and when he glanced over his shoulder to look at her, he saw that her eyes were closed. He knew it had probably been a stupid idea to go looking for her tonight, but when she called and told her where she was, he had a hard time staying away. And after seeing what condition she was in, he was glad he showed up. He was somewhat surprised when he realized they both lived in D.C., but not as surprised as she seemed to have been.

Ren unwrapped her arms from his stomach and got off his motorcycle. When he turned back, Rey had made no move to get up. He unbuckled her helmet and took it off of her. Her eyes were still closed, but she groaned low in her throat. She seemed semi conscious. In this state, walking seemed to be out of the question, so Ren scooped her up in his arms again. Her head leaned into his chest and he resisted the urge to kiss her forehead. He walked into his building and pressed the button for the elevator and stepped inside when it opened. He was glad there was no one around. Walking into your building with a barely conscious woman in your arms wasn’t exactly the best look.

When he finally reached the door to his apartment, he struggled a bit with his keys before he got the door open. He stepped inside, shut the door behind him and paused. What was he supposed to do now? He hadn’t thought this far ahead. The only reason he brought her back here was because she wouldn’t tell him where she lived, not that he blamed her.

Rey had decided to fall asleep in his arms on the way up in the elevator, and he figured she wasn’t going to be able to go anywhere for a few hours at least. He shrugged and took her to his bedroom. When he laid her down on his bed he realized her pants and puke stains on them from her episode earlier. He hesitated for a moment before he unbuttoned her pants and pulled them off of her. Once he had them in his hands he covered her with the blanket on his bed. Rey snuggled into the blanket and buried her face into his pillow. Ren stared at her. It was strange having her here. For so long they had been meeting up in hotel rooms. Doing that was simpler. Having her in his bed like this felt strangely intimate, like he had allowed her into his world. He wasn’t sure how he felt about it. He also had no idea how she would feel about it when she woke up.

He thought of something then, and he went into his bathroom that was connected to his bedroom. He opened his medicine cabinet and took out the bottle of Advil. Rey was going to wake up with a headache, he was sure of that. She would want this. He walked back into his bedroom and placed the bottle of Advil on his bedside table.

He took another few seconds to look at her as she slept in his bed, his feelings all over the place, before he turned around and left the bedroom, closing the door behind him.

*****

The first thing Rey was cognizant of was her drool. She was definitely drooling into a pillow. She reached up and wiped her mouth. She hated when she did that. Then she felt the splitting headache she had and brought both of her hands up to her temples. This was a bad one, but that’s what she should get for drinking.

_Drinking…I was drinking…and then—_

It came back to her then. Drinking by herself at Teddy’s, calling Ren, Ren showing up and…what happened after that?

She was having a hard time remembering but she was starting to realize she wasn’t in her apartment. Wherever she was, it wasn’t familiar to her. It was dark, but her eyes had adjusted enough that she could tell she was not in her room. She reached over to the table next to her and turned on the lamp that sat there. When the light was on, she took in her surroundings. The bed she had been sleeping in had white sheets and a blue comforter. The walls were mostly bare of anything one might expect in a bedroom. There was a bookshelf across from her next to an open door that led to a bathroom. Rey had never been in this room before.

_How did I—_

Ren. She remembered then, vaguely, Ren carrying her to his motorcycle. She was pretty sure she had puked at some point as well. Ren must have taken her here, back to his home.

When she glanced out the window she could see that it was still nighttime, so she couldn’t have been there for too long. She looked at the clock on the table next to her and it read 3:17.

Her head was still killing her and she was about to get up to look for something to take in the bathroom when she saw an Advil bottle on the table next to her. She immediately grabbed the bottle and threw back two of them, not caring that she had to dry swallow. She laid her head back on the pillow and tried to focus on making her headache go away. She stayed like that for maybe ten minutes when her headache finally felt like he was subsiding.

Now she had another problem. She desperately needed to pee. She threw the blanket off and headed for the bathroom across from the bed. When she reached the toilet she noticed that she wasn’t wearing any pants. She couldn’t even begin to guess how that had happened.

Once she finished her business and flushed the toilet, she washed her hands and looked at herself in the mirror. She looked pale and her hair was a mess. On the bathroom counter were a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream, and a razor blade. All Ren’s items, presumably. It was odd to see such mundane things. Ren often seemed like a fantasy to her, but he brushed his teeth and shaved just like everyone else.

She splashed some water on her face and ran her fingers through her hair, trying to fix the rat’s nest. Then she took some of the toothpaste and put it on her finger and finger brushed her teeth. She hadn’t done that since she was a child, but she also wasn’t one to use someone else’s toothbrush.

When she was finished, she looked slightly less ghastly and she left the bathroom. She wasn’t exactly sure what she was supposed to do now. Should she go back to sleep? Should she try to sneak out of the apartment so she could avoid having to confront Ren?

That second option quickly became impossible when she realized that she didn’t have her phone or keys. They were in her pants, and she had no idea where those were. She couldn’t go anywhere without her phone. Leaving without seeing Ren was clearly not going to be an option, but she didn’t want to go back to sleep either. She didn’t think she’d be able to sleep knowing she was in Ren’s bed.

So instead, she walked to the door leading out of the room and put her hand on the doorknob. She hesitated for a few moments before twisting it.

When she stepped outside the room, she found herself in a short hallway. Down the hall, she could hear the TV and see the light from the TV flashing. She took a deep breath and headed towards the noise. When she stepped out of the hall into what she assumed was the living room, she saw the TV playing some old movie and a couch in front of it. There was a foot laid on the armrest of the couch. She knew it was Ren, but she couldn’t see the rest of him. She stepped closer, moving to the side of the couch where she saw his foot. She wondered if he was sleeping, but when she could finally see his face, his eyes were open and on the TV.

She didn’t have to stand here long before he noticed her. He shot up on the couch, surprised. He was wearing a wife beater and sweat pants. Rey had never seen him in sleep clothes.

“Hey,” he said, his voice tired. “I didn’t…I figured you wouldn’t be up until morning.”

Rey stared at him. She realized then that she had come out here without any game plan. She wasn’t sure what to say.

“Well…I’m up,” she said, not able to think of anything else.

Ren nodded and looked down. Apparently he didn’t know what to say either.

“Where are my pants?” she asked when she remembered she was standing in front of him without pants on.

“I put them in the wash,” he said. “You puked earlier…and it got on your pants.”

“My phone and keys?” she asked.

“On top of the dryer,” he told her.

Rey nodded and looked down. This was more awkward than she expected. It was strange to be in his home with him, even stranger because they weren’t together anymore.

“Why did you bring me here, Ren?” she asked him.

He raised his eyebrows at her. “You wouldn’t tell me where you lived, remember? I had to take you somewhere.”

“Why didn’t you just take me to a hotel or something?” If he had taken her to a hotel, that would have been easier, but now she would know where he lived. He couldn’t take that back. She would always know how to find him now and she didn’t want that.

He scoffed. “I live five minutes from that bar. I wasn’t going to check you into a hotel.”

“You should have,” she snapped. “Why did you even show up?”

He seemed taken aback by her tone and he stood up from the couch. “You drunk dialed me and told me you were alone at a bar. I wanted to make sure you were safe.”

“I don’t need you to take care of me,” she said, knowing she was being harsh. “I was fine.”

“You could barely walk,” he said, taking a few steps closer to her. “I was just trying to help. Excuse me for giving a shit.”

Her temper flared at that. “Oh, you wanted to help me? Get in good with me so you could use me again? Is that it?”

“That’s ridiculous and you know it is,” he shot back. “I told you what happened.”

“And you expected me to believe someone who spent weeks lying to me?” she said. “And even if I did, that doesn’t change anything. You had plenty of chances to tell me and you didn’t.”

He was in front of her now and he clenched his jaw at her words. She’d obviously struck a nerve. “What do you want?” he asked, his voice rose. “Do you want me to apologize again? Fine, I’m sorry. I fucked up and I’m sorry.”

“Save it,” Rey said coldly, holding up her hand. “That’s not what I want.”

“Then what do you want?”

She looked him up and down for a moment, considering. But she already knew what the answer was. Before he realized what was happening, Rey shoved him back against the armchair of the couch. He looked up at her, bewildered.

“Poor Ben had to lie to me because he’s scared of his boss, isn’t that right?” she said, her tone high pitched and mocking. “You know, when we first met, I didn’t take you for a coward.”

“Rey…” His voice had a hint of warning in it. She could see the anger in his eyes.

“I thought we had something, I really did,” she went on. “But you had to go and screw up one of the only good things you had, didn’t you?”

She made to slap him across the face, but he caught her hand in his before she made contact with his cheek. He yanked her up against him, his other hand circling around her waist, holding her tight.

“Enough,” he said harshly. The anger was still in his eyes.

“You’re a lying bastard,” she spat at him.

“I know.” He made to kiss her then, but Rey turned her lips away and he made contact with her cheek. He kissed his way down to her neck and Rey buried her hand in his hair encouragingly. She yanked the roots of his hair until she heard him groan against her. Her other hand was exploring his chest. She missed touching him. It felt right to be in his arms like this. But she didn’t want softness right now, and he didn’t give it to her. He was licking and biting her neck, his hands holding her so tight she thought she would bruise.

When he brought his lips back up to try to kiss her mouth again, she moved away, pulling him with her around to the couch. She lay back on the cushions and pulled him down on top of her. He kissed her neck before he sat up on top of her and pulled his wife beater off and tossed it to the side. Her hands were on his chest immediately, touching every familiar curve. His hands went to work on her shirt, and she lifted her arms up as he pulled it off of her and tossed it away. Once again he tried kissing her lips but she turned away. She heard him make a frustrated sound as he kissed down her chest instead. Kissing Ren was incredible. She could lose herself forever in his kisses, but that wasn’t what she wanted now. She didn’t want the tenderness that his kisses would give her.

Ren kissed down her stomach until he reached her underwear. He put his fingers under the waistband and yanked them down her legs. She helped, kicking them off when they reached her ankles. Ren immediately stuck one of his fingers into her heat and Rey practically shot off the couch. She had been wet ever since she shoved him against the couch, and Ren knew exactly how to work her with his hand. He inserted another finger and Rey’s groans grew louder. She looked at him and she saw that he was watching her intently, taking in her every sound and expression. Feeling his fingers inside her like this reminded Rey exactly why her own hands had been a poor substitute.

When he seemed satisfied with the work his hands had done, he pulled his fingers out of her and leaned over her again. He reached around her and unhooked the clasp of her bra, tossing it to the side when it was off. Then he tried to capture her lips with his again, chasing her lips when she turned away.

“Come on, angel,” he groaned against her cheek.

“No,” she said firmly.

He made an agitated noise and pulled back a little bit. Rey used the opportunity to turn herself around so she was on her stomach beneath him. She felt him move away from her. She could feel him staring down at her and he didn’t move. Then he took her arm and tried to turn her back around. Rey wrenched her arm away from his grasp and stayed put. She knew this would bother him, knew he wouldn’t want to take her if he couldn’t see her face.

“Rey,” he said, annoyance apparent in his voice. “I won’t—”

“I’ll have you like this,” she snapped at him. She was growing impatient. “Not any other way.”

He leaned back again and Rey couldn’t feel him against her. For a moment she wondered if he wouldn’t take her at all. Then she heard the sound of his pulling his sweatpants off and her breath hitched in excitement. It had been too long since they were together, and she wanted him inside her desperately.

Ren took her hips in his hands and pulled her up so she was on all fours. They had never done this before; neither of them had ever suggested the position. Rey had never done it with any man, and it didn’t suit Ren’s needs either. The truth was, Rey was still trying to punish him. She wanted this, wanted him inside her, but she didn’t want him to have it his way, to let him see her face when she came.

She was also hoping to make him mad. She wanted him to take her more roughly, and when she felt him slide into her from behind, she knew she had gotten what she wanted. He immediately began pumping into her hard, making her gasp at his every thrust. He grunted as he pumped in and out of her. It felt so good to have him inside her again, after weeks of dissatisfaction with her own weak efforts. She heard the sound of his skin slapping against hers and it only made her wetter. This was what she wanted, to make him mad. Her words, refusing to kiss him, and refusing to look at him, it had all pissed him off and she was reaping the benefits of it now.

His hand snaked up her back and he grasped a handful of her hair and pulled. She moaned at the feeling and wondered why she had never been in this position before with a man. She supposed she might have found it demeaning, but it didn’t feel that way at all. The angle was perfect and with every thrust she could feel herself getting closer to her climax.

Ren reached down with his other hand to stroke her clit once, and she pushed back against him trying to catch his hand again. She was so close.

“Come _on_ , Ren,” she complained. “Can you do the job or not?”

He made an angry noise at her words and his fingers were immediately on her clit again, stroking her. She cried out at the feeling. Her knees and arms were starting to wear out. She wanted to come, and she was so close.

“Let me feel you come, Rey,” Ren groaned out as he stroked her harder.

After just a few more strokes from Ren’s hand, Rey came. She cried out as she did, her arms shaking from the effort to hold her up.

Ren wasn’t done yet. He was still pumping in and out of her as Rey tried to come down from her orgasm. Her thoughts were clear, and she wasn’t done with her plan yet. Once she had steadied herself enough, she turned around and shoved Ren’s shoulder. He slid out of her and she pulled herself away from him. Before he could grab her and bring her back to him, Rey was off the couch, picking up her shirt and underwear.

“Rey!” Ren sounded incredulous and angry at being denied his orgasm.

She ignored him and moved around to the back of the couch, heading towards the hall leading to his bedroom.

“Rey, wait! Please…” His voice came again from behind her.

She stopped and slowly turned back towards the couch, her clothes bunched up and held to her chest. He was on his knees on the couch facing her. She knew from the start that she wasn’t going to let him come inside her. She wanted to come herself but that didn’t mean she was going to let him do the same. She was still furious with him, and she would not reward him for his betrayal.

After a few seconds of staring at each other, Ren reached between his legs and began stroking himself. Rey watched, not making any move to return to the couch. His eyes stayed locked on her face and he continued to pump his cock faster and faster. Rey felt a heat between her legs return as she watched him, but she pushed that feeling down.

When he finally came with a loud groan, Rey still didn’t move. What she just did felt good, denying him his pleasure, making him come in a much less satisfying way. After what he had done to her, she felt this was a worthy punishment.

He didn’t say anything as he came down from his orgasm, just kept his eyes on her face. Rey stared at him for a few moments longer before she retreated down the hallway and entered his room, closing the door behind her.

*****

Rey had snuck out of the bedroom a few hours later when she was sure Ren was asleep and found her pants in the dryer and her cellphone and keys sitting on top of the dryer. Then she retreated back into Ren’s room. She had managed to get a couple more hours of sleep, but it was restless sleep. It was difficult to sleep in Ren’s bed, and difficult to keep her mind off of what had happened between them that night. She didn’t regret any of it, but now she had even less of a clue about where they stood than she did before.

When she woke up just before 9:00 and decided she needed to go. She picked up her phone from the bedside table and called an Uber. The app said it would arrive in ten minutes. She got out of bed, freshened up in the bathroom and pulled on her pants. Maybe Ren was still sleeping and she could sneak out. She made sure she had everything before she opened the door to the hall and walking into the living room.

She saw right away that Ren wasn’t there, and she wondered if he had left the apartment, but then she looked to her left and saw him sitting on a stool in the kitchen, a bowl of cereal in front of him. He was looking at her curiously.

Rey wasn’t sure what to say, not after last night. Her feelings for Ren…they were all too complicated. She still didn’t regret what she did, but that didn’t mean she knew how to deal with the fallout.

“Cereal?” he asked her, breaking the silence.

Rey swallowed. She was starving, but she couldn’t stay. If she stayed, they might start talking, and if they started talking, she wasn’t sure she’d ever want to leave. She’d probably forgive him. “I can’t stay. I called an Uber.”

He just blinked in response.

Not knowing what else to say, Rey moved towards the front door, ready to leave, if only to get his eyes off of her.

She felt him come up behind her when her hand was on the knob. “Don’t,” she said, before he could touch her.

“Rey, please…” His voice sounded sad, pleading.

Rey turned around to look at him. He was towering over her. Part of her wanted to lean up and kiss him, but she still felt so angry with him. That feeling wouldn’t go away.

He reached his hand up, as if to touch her face, but immediately dropped it again. “I’m so sorry, Rey.”

The expression on his face made her want to stay, to throw herself into his arms and tell him she forgave him. She closed her eyes and dropped her chin, not able to look at him.

“If there’s no chance you will ever forgive me…” Ren said. “Please tell me now. If you don’t, I’ll always wonder.” His last few words were whispered.

Rey took a deep breath and managed to make herself look him in the eye. He looked like he did when she confronted him in the cabin, broken and afraid.

“I don’t know,” she said quietly, and it was true. She didn’t have an answer for him. She bit her lip and tried to keep herself from tearing up. “Give me time.”

With that, she walked out of the apartment and left him alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, I'm not ready to let go of the angst quite yet. But Ren really screwed up. Rey shouldn't let him off the hook so easily. But I was ready to return to the smut, lol. Hope you guys enjoyed.


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